Cunting XH is gaslighting the DDs

[SarahStratton]

Has told them I never loved him, that he was badly treated by me, and that I just wanted his money.

Can't be a sewing bee as an alibi as it's too easy to find out I hate sewing. Knitting, perhaps? Fine knitting needles would make good weapons.

I'm glad they won't believe him.

My DSDs are only just starting to see through their mother's lies... Previous humdingers include

"your dad [my dh] was not present at your ELCS birth, he swanned off to Paris with some girl"
And
"the dr told me I need to smoke or I'll die"

Yeah, not gaslighting, just being a subhuman wankstain and making a risible attempt at trying to manipulate them.

Surely killing is too good for him? What about stripping him off, putting him in a cage, letting him sit in his own excrement and then inviting the whole of Mumsnet around to heckle and chuck buns at him?

I am more than willing to help with this.....IF the stamping squad would then like to come down and kidnap MY wankstain and chuck him in the cage too, before disbanding?

(CSA due to take him to court in January. Apparently.)

I never tried to get maintenance off XH because he never had a bean. However he's recently rearranged his life, sold his house, and seems to have plenty of money to bribe lavish on taking the DCs out to dinner etc. Maybe he could be persuaded at gunpoint to chuck a little towards keeping a roof over their heads.

Get him to take up field archery. I will sort out the rest.

Feeling more cheerful yet, stratters?

Much more cheerful.

I am happily planning his funeral. I think I shall wear bright pink.

Can I take his eyeballs out with a corkscrew? Please? I read it in a book and I've been itching to try it out.

A kicking we shall go.. with licence to stamp, and stomp, and hack, like true vengeful goddesses warrior women.

Go easy on the sharpening, Sarah - decapitation with a blunt blade is entirely too good for some of them and death by a thousand cuts with a fish knife is a more apt demise for the likes of your ex-cunt.

Btw, think sunshine yellow with pillar box red accessories to match the gas station roses you'll cheerfully- reverently place on his coffin.

Can I watch, M&G? Always interested in acquiring a new skill

Of course.
I have a lot of random violent knowledge gleamed from martina cole books I hide on my kindle

DP should live in fear really.

Hmm I like you're thinking. I shall go as a chintz curtain instead. I was going to chuck a couple of porn mags on his coffin instead. Keep the wanker busy down there.

Do what you like to him. I always fancied using cheese wire tbh.

Chintz it is. And as your fellow celebrants mourners, we'll be suitably attired in matching pelmets mini-skirts.

Cheese wire you say? Mmm... I can see the logic - considerably less aftertaste than biting it off.

How about a large neon disco floor gravestone to seal the deal.

The FistOfDeath is at your disposal Stratters

The thing is, they probably WILL believe him. Kids at that age are really impressionable, irrespective of how intelligent they are, and don't want to think that their parents lie to them. I know one kid who used to say that his own mother was 'a slag who goes round with a mattress strapped to her back' because his dad told him this often enough that he believed it.
Don't try to rise above it - you need to fight back somehow or he'll poison them.

No they won't believe him. He is a nobber and they know it.