Would you forgive a one night stand?!

[999HELPMYPUDDINGSONFIRE]

Posting this on behalf of my best friend.
Well she doesn't know I've posted it but she's coming over at 9 and I don't have any advice for her at the moment :-(
She's been with her husband for 2 and a half years, they have 1 little boy who is 9 months old.
Things haven't been going well for the past few months, nothing major, just everyday stresses I guess.
He has never given reason for her to doubt him although they did meet on a dating website and she has wondered before if he is still using it however hass no proof of this.
They had a row yesterday morning about here to go on holiday next year, was meant to be a romantic getaway to try and patch things up with them.
He booked it for feb and she wanted to go when Warmer, silly row.
The row resulted in her saying she didn't think it would work, is there a point in the holiday at all?
He stormed out to his brothers who he was going out with last night anyway.
Turns out he went to a bar, met a girl and ended up back at her place!
He was texting Sophie all night so in between shagging this bird etc!
She was asking where he was and he told her ( just forgot the other girl part )
He came home at 11am and is saying he wants it to work as did my friend so they kissed and made up.
She only knows this after finding messages in his phone from The girl, asking if he got home okay ( she knew he still live with her )
His reply was "yeah, had a great night but she wants to work it out now so seems to be going well my end"
Doesn't look like he was planning on meeting again but they hadn't actually broke up although he says he thought it was over.
Mess.

Not in this scenario no sorry....

Wasn't planning to see the girl again but gave her his number?

How do you know he slept with this girl?

no

You came from NMs and you're posting on behalf of a friend? You don't like MN enough to recommend it to her then? Is she still hunnied up on NMs? Sorry to be rude but go away with your Damascene conversion nonsense.

Ewwww, no.

It's men like this ( and women too) who make me feel oooooooooooold.
They want to give up on a relationship that involves a 9 month child because of daily stresses and strains.
He needs to grow up and face up to his responisbilities- and so does your friend.

Their rows over hols etc sound childish and petty- and poor communication.

I hope BTW your friend is not really called Sophie or she won't thank you for your candour!

so- he left her and their son on New years eve to shag ( you think???) a woman and meanwhile was talking to your friend throughout?

First, you have no proof what happened.

So don't assume.

But if it's true, your friend is well shot of him - doesn't sound like a life partner but as i said, they both sound young and silly.

No

No. But then I don't live in Walford. Your friend and her husband need to realise life is not a soap opera, it's real and has responsibilities and consequences. Poor little DS

Is this a Stenders thing then?

No.

No Sarah but this sort of stupid, childish drama littered "relationship" complete with twat DH, texting Detectives and friend juries piss me right off.

Is this some sort of un subtle invasion?

If they were arguing about where to go on holiday 'to patch things up' it sounds as if they should have booked a break with Relate or another marital counselling service.

Plenty of holiday destinations, such as the Caribbean, are warm in February and if they go long-haul there'll be less chance of one of them storming off home if they don't like what the other is saying.

If they've been together for 2.5 years in total and have a 9month baby, it would seem that they rushed into marriage and are now repenting at leisure.

It's very often the case in these situations that the aggrieved party needs to vent and advice as such is not required.

Only your friend can decide whether she's prepared to forgive and/or forget, and you're best advised to encourage her to express her feelings and make up her own mind as to whether she can come to terms with his alleged adultery - if he was texting your friend all night, it begs the question of whether he actually did the deed.

So how exactly does a text from a woman asking if a bloke got home all right equate to the fact that he was shagging her? Or was there more detail than that? Otherwise it doesn't add up.

They both sound very immature. If he left his phone lying around with incriminating texts on it then he's either just thick or he wanted her to find it.

Unlikely :
You are very rude.

He admitted it after she questioned him that's how she knows.

Some people here are very strange

An invasion? That's sad

Here are some of your other threads for continuity:

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/1368853-Should-I-believe-him-Re-dating-bloody-websites

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/1368213-Is-him-watching-porn-a-big-deal-Is-he-missing-something-with-our-sex-life

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/1369471-Would-you-consider-this-cheating

No, I wouldn't forgive a one night stand.

no

Ah i see, thanks Lizza.

Puddingsonfire, brains burnt to cinders i'd say.

Those texts don't suggest a shag to me.

But no I wouldn't forgive a one night stand - it would be a deal breaker in this house.

But they 'were on a break'