This is long and a bit complicated, so please bear with me. I split up with my dd?s father when she was 18mths old because he was a drug addict, he was smoking dope, injecting speed/cocaine etc, taking acid, infact anything he could get his hands on (I?m not 100% if he was taking heroin or not).
I fought access because he was violent and out of his head most of the time. Eventually when she was three and able to speak for herself a bit she started to tell exactly what was happening during access visits and how she came to have bruises on her. At last the social services believed me and access was stopped.
At last my beautiful daughter was safe, I brought her up single-handedly (my family had disowned me years before when I took up with her father, yes; I know I was young and stupid!) I thought I had done a very good job of bringing her up and when she had her first dd I was such a proud Nan. She is 24 yrs old and has since had another dd.
What I didn?t know was that while she was pregnant with her first she had got in touch with her father behind my back as she had learned that he had had other kids. I can?t blame her for it; I suppose it?s natural to want to know. I noticed she started to change, I thought it was pnd at first, but it was much worse, he had introduced her to drugs. I eventually found out when it was too late.
I have tried to talk to her, tried to make her see what drugs are doing to her. I pointed out to her that most of her father?s friends have died before the age of 45, some over-dosed, some died of cancer and some have committed suicide (I am convinced that all of the deaths were drug related). She won?t listen to me, she says she needs it, can?t cope without it, she says she is only taking puff.
Yesterday she turned up at my home crying, when I asked her what was wrong she replied that she hadn?t got any ?stuff? and she had to go to her fathers to get some. She told me that she was craving so badly that she nearly shook her 5mth old dd in frustration. She then left the kids with me and left. She came back 3 hours later smashed out of her skull to pick up the girls. I kept on making up reasons for her to stay so that I could gauge her ability to look after the girls. I fed the kids and kept them here until it was nearly their bed-time so all she had to do was put them to bed.
I?m at a loss to know what to do, my beautiful dd that I fought so hard to protect and that I was so proud of has changed into some-one I hardly recognise. I fear for my grand daughters. I feel totally powerless.
I hate to say it but why couldn?t her father have died a long time ago before she got in touch with him again?