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Relationships

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Original poster

Fallen out with dp 5 days before due date

5 replies

lightsandshapes · 23/10/2011 01:49

what do I do? It was a silly argument - he accused me of dominating the house because I was watching a programme I liked, whilst eating dinner I cooked, though he did exactly the same watching the rugby whilst eating a meal I had lovingly prepared the day before (see the cooking theme).

Went to bed early to avoid him. Feeling resentful and don't want to talk to him, but my baby is due in 5 days and he's my birth partner. Surely this is not the frame of mind to be approaching my first labour. I'm terrified as it is But h was quite harsh with me and I can't let it go.....

OP posts:

ionysis · 23/10/2011 08:18

Oh those pregnancy hormones, I remember it well. Did you ever think that maybe, just maybe he is shitting himself about the birth to come and is pretty on edge right now? Yes, I KNOW you are too, and have every reason to be, but this is a pretty stressful and scary time for BOTH of you and you need to cut each other some slck if either of you are snappy or irrational.

Go and give him a cuddle and tell him you're scared about everything and feeling really vulnerable and could he please give you a nice cuddle and tell you everything will be OK and try to be extra nice to you and you'll try to be the same.

You are both grownups (I assume!) and if an argument about who watches what on TV can;t be smoothed over then you'll have FAR bigger issues to deal with after your baby comes and you're both operating on 3 hours sleep a night!

babyhammock · 23/10/2011 08:38

Hi sounds like he's not helping much at all tbh (the cooking comment). Has he been supportive the rest of the pregancy?

Be nice if he cooked you a meal esp as you're only five days to go, let alone give you a bollocking for watching your programme. I'd keep an eye on this..sounds like twattish behaviour to me x

ionysis · 23/10/2011 10:42

Does anyone on here do anything except blame the men for all and every problem in the relationship?

No one is a saint and we all have off days and say twatish things, even the OP at some point in her life I'm sure. Nursing resentment about a silly argument when you are both stressed and at a scary time is also twatish.

BearWith · 23/10/2011 11:38

ionysis, do you do much except play devils advocate for men on this forum? Every one of your posts seems to be the same. Bit dull, don't you think?
Or are you trying to give a more 'balanced' view?

ionysis · 23/10/2011 11:51

The OP herself admits it was "a silly argument". Do you suggest we should be advising her to continue to be pissed off with him and stay in a sulk and so ruin her birth experience and his? People have rows. People are unreasonable. All I seem to see on here are "he's an ass" comments. Yes, men can be asses. So can we.

Make up, move on. Don't make mountains out of molehills. The OP is having a baby in 5 days - they had a spat over a TV show. Have some perspective. Be the bigger person. Don't sulk, drop the self-righteousness, TALK to your partner, get back to enjoying this very special and unique time.

All this "you go girl" "leave him he''s abusive" "he's being a twat - watch him!" "reg flags" "don't let yourself be treated this way".... it's not ACTUALLY helpful or constructive to anyone's relationship is it?

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