Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

I am a serial dater.

96 replies

oleblueeyes · 04/08/2011 17:31

I've lurked for a while so I thought I'd post. I expect to get shot down in flames but what the hell. I thought it may give you some insight into the male psyche ( I'm a bloke by the way).
Basically I am a serial dater. In fact as I write this I have 9 women on the go at various stages of intimacy.
Two I have slept with.
Three I have snogged and may sleep with.
Four I have just started dating but I expect at least 2/3 of those to end in sex.
Why am I doing it?
I like the attention. I like sex. And I don'tI fancy/like any of them enough to want to commit myself to.
Most I have met online.
I'm thinking of quitting this whole charade. It's exhausting. I've been as honest where I can with all these women with regards to how far I want a relationship to go with them.
One of the women who I have sex with simply wants that...sex.
Another who I am just dating I have told that I didn't want anything serious but she wants to carry on seeing me.
So there you have it.
Please form an orderly queue to stcik the boot in.

OP posts:
buzzsore · 04/08/2011 17:34

The only thing about your post that makes me want to stick the boot in is the idea we need insight into the male psyche as though it's a special gift you can give us - I mean, honestly, I have men in my life, do you think I don't talk & interact with them? Grin

KatieScarlett2833 · 04/08/2011 17:35

As long as your datees know about your dating methodology, where's the harm?

If you are letting them think you are serious about them then you are a prick.

Which one are you?

Sausagesarenottheonlyfruit · 04/08/2011 17:43

That's concurrent dating, not serial dating.

SarahStratton · 04/08/2011 17:44
Original poster
oleblueeyes · 04/08/2011 17:44

Well, they certainly don't all know about each other if that's what you mean?

But I haven't let any of them think that I'm serious about them.

Does that qualify me as a prick ?

OP posts:
SarahStratton · 04/08/2011 17:45

No, just your typical wistful thinking 14 year old boy.

cheekeymonkey · 04/08/2011 17:45

Boring.....being a man doesn't make that an exclusive lifestyle choice you know, women do it too! Shock horror! Biscuit

ViolaTricolor · 04/08/2011 17:46

Exactly, Sausages. That's the bit that makes me want to get my red pen out.

BlobChob · 04/08/2011 17:47

No need for the psyche insight or putting the boot in...you live as you see fit. I can't help but wonder why you started lurking though. Has that given you insight into the female psyche?

ReadyToDrink · 04/08/2011 17:51

Maybe he's looking for Lucky Number 10? Wink

wtfhappenedtomauricetinkler · 04/08/2011 17:51

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by Mumsnet.

SarahStratton · 04/08/2011 17:52

How old are you OP?

LittleHousebytheRiver · 04/08/2011 17:54

Sausages would you not call it parallel dating? Like batteries?

OBE do you worry about your own sexual health at all? If your dates behave similarly you are putting yourself at risk.

Original poster
oleblueeyes · 04/08/2011 17:56

ha ha ha....me...a stud ?!!!

Nah, I'm not handsome enough, though I'm in reasonably good shape for a bloke my age (mid forties) and I'm a good snogger ;-)

OP posts:
Sausagesarenottheonlyfruit · 04/08/2011 17:59

mauricetinkler I think you've pulled [wunk]

wtfhappenedtomauricetinkler · 04/08/2011 18:00

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by Mumsnet.

ReadyToDrink · 04/08/2011 18:00

Are you a fireman? You sound like a fireman Hmm

SarahStratton · 04/08/2011 18:01

But not that successful if you're not attracting anyone 'good enough' for you. Or maybe your goalposts are a little high?

IMO players are very off-putting to women.

Original poster
oleblueeyes · 04/08/2011 18:05

I agree about not being successful Sarah. And I agree about players being off putting.
I don't think I am one though.
I'm honest and try to have integrity.
I have made it clear to a couple, who started to get a bit full-on, that I didn't want anything serious so I probably wasn't for them.
I hadn't had sex with them at this point.
Both still said they wanted to continue seeing me.
I have had sex with one of them and will probably with the other too.

OP posts:
SarahStratton · 04/08/2011 18:07

So they all know about each other?

Original poster
oleblueeyes · 04/08/2011 18:10

No.
But I have not told any of them that we are exclusive either.
I know what you are getting at. That I say I'm honest, but haven't told them about each other.
But I don't think they need to know. I don't ask them whether they are seeing anyone else.
If they asked me I would tell them the truth.
Also, if I met one who I really fell for I would stop seeing all the others.

OP posts:
SarahStratton · 04/08/2011 18:13

IMO they need to know about each other. I would be horrified if someone was doing this to me, even if it wasn't exclusive. You are playing with their health, as well as yours.

HerHissyness · 04/08/2011 18:14

What a load of BOLLOCKS!

If this is true, which I sincerely doubt... Sorry but where is your respect?
These women are not commodities. You have no gift of insight to offer us. Sound more of a Narc than anything.

And on the relationships board too. How pathetic.

wtfhappenedtomauricetinkler · 04/08/2011 18:15

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by Mumsnet.

Original poster
oleblueeyes · 04/08/2011 18:15

I always wear a condom.

OP posts: