Holiday's without the kids- could/do you do this ?

[Mummyvicky]

Quite a few of my friends think nothing of leaving their children with inlaws/parents while they have long weekends and even weeks away on holiday as just the two of them.
I said to them I could never do it, and the kids being there would make my holiday better, and they all insisted I was too "clingy" and that they need time away from the kids to survive!!! They are a mixture of working and sah mums...is this true ?
I was the odd one out at playgroup, and starting to feel I'm abnormal not wanting to leave my children for a dirty weekend/holiday !!

Im just interested to gauge people's thoughts on this.... ( please tell me I'm not a freak!!!)

"I also find it sad that people have children and then can't even cope with a family holiday with them. All too soon they'll be grown up and gone."

Except sometimes they don't grow up and go (or if they do it's into care when they're still going to need you). Everyone's situation is very different- we have to find people who can look after ds1 (including allowing us to go away) because there may be times when he needs to be left somewhere. The other kids need a break from autism as much as we do, and we can't take him with us as we never know whether the place we are going to will be safe. A friend lent us their caravan to try with all 3 boys recently, but there was no way of locking the windows so we had to come home again.

We will be carers (as in dh and myself) for the rest of our lives. Even when (not if, when) ds1 goes into residential care we will still be responsible for him. We have 1 life, so we enjoy the time we get with each other knowing the 3 children are happy and cared for.

It is great if you can leave your child with relatives, but if you're breastfeeding, or you don't have relatives, or the money, or whatever, then you have to find other ways to 'maintain' your relationships! A lot of us manage without regular trips away together. We even manage to have sex and an 8 month old baby!

I went to Rome for my best mate's wedding with my dp when ds was 7.5mths old. We were gone for 4 nights. DS is a dream baby sleeps through, eats all his food really lovely temperament - except when teething and he can go off food, be a bit fractious and wake up during the night if really bad pain. The weekend we were away he chose to cut 3 teeth. He was with my sis who I trust implicilty as she did childcare course and loves my nephews and niece to pieces (constantly babysitting so loads of experience). When we weren't fretting about DS we had a lovely time but in hindsight 4 days was too much, and so badly timed it wasn't funny. The hardest part after the leaving -which was sooooooooooooo tough- was knowing he was in pain and I wasn't there to snuggle him and comfort him. We both couldn't wait to get back for a cuddle with him!

I've been away for a weekend and left ds at home with my parents - but that was more for their sake than because we needed a break.

In June they are coming over and asked us if we want to go away for a long weekend and leave ds with them (again at our house).

Ds has many allergies that make going on holiday stressful and difficult, we would find it impossible to stay in a hotel or eat out every night. Staying at home with his grandparents would be like a holiday for him and safe. It would also be a holiday for me and dh. So I am very tempted. If he didn't have these restrictions then I would take him no question.

I am taking ds for a long weekend for a city break in January on my own, and we are going away with his Aunty over Xmas, so he's not exactly deprived of holidays.

I wouldn't have left ds before he could talk though.

I'm happy to leave dd with the GP's whilst we go away for a night or two no probs (weddings, or just a nice romantic getaway about once a year!) but wouldn't leave her for the whole week with them, after all whats the point of having a family if your going to do that?
Have never understood ss's mothers viewppoint on that one, she's never taken him away with her and her dh on hols and he's quite old now and getting resentful about it.....