I have a dp who I've been with for quite a while. We don't live together. He is a bit controlling about how I have the house and apparently finds it completely unacceptable for any of the children's toys to be lying around the house and thinks literally everything should have a place. He's one of those super-tidy people, and I, although I think cleaning is important and I can understand that some people are like that don't mind if a few things are out of place.
So at the weekend he said that he's stressed about how I run the house and he thinks every time the children ask me if they can do something I say 'yes' and he thinks I should expect them to help tidying the house. He does have a point, but I have a 2 year old who constantly pulls things out. He says this is no excuse for letting them get toys out, his family at home have 11 children and their house is perfect blah, blah, blah.
I have been ill again and didn't welcome the confrontation and reminded him I wasn't brought up the same way as him to think that everything depends on a spotless house. Then yesterday he suddenly said he's going to leave the country soon. I was really upset because he sounded as if he meant it. I began to think it wasn't about the house and that he obviously just isn't happy with me any more. However he didn't leave my house at any time. Eventually he said he did not intend to leave the country and all these conversations led to him initiating sex which I felt he meant to impress on me something - I can't describe it. When he saw how upset I was I caught a look of triumph on his face. He's always said he loves me and he wants us to have a future.
By the end of yesterday I felt so confused and drained that I could not see the situation clearly at all.