The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Head To The Summer Of Sobriety

[Mouseface]

Hello

I'm Mouse

Welcome aboard The Brave Babe's Battle Bus. There are a whole host of lovely posters here who will support your journey to sobriety, however you choose to get there.

We are a Bus full of drinkers, non-drinkers and those who are somewhere in between.

BUT - we will never judge or leave a poster out in the cold. So, find a seat and settle down for the journey ahead.

And HERE is the last thread and those before it too. Just follow the links to read the journeys so far.

Hi Golly, hi Mouse, thanks for your welcome. Saturday mornings are definitely more pleasant now. It's true that I've never regretted not having a drink, but plenty of regrets as a result of drink.

Sounds like a plan Golly

Right you lovely lot, I'm off to bed.

Be good. See you over the weekend.

Night. xx

Antidenial - thank you for stopping posting. I appreciate you respecting my request.

Golly AVRT looks reallly interesting, saying 'never' is something I have been battling with, and have not been able to say to myself or others, but the AVRT steps are useful in affirming this desire.
Thank you for pointing me in this direction.

I have resisted responding to your threads PBR and Anti-D, but feel I have to.

I read your posts yesterday, and although I think you show a regrettable lack of courtesy in continuing to pursue your own agenda on this thread, it is a public forum and as such. Is open to comments from whomever chooses to participate. I reported your longer post to MN on the basis that it was potentially libellous.

Is it reasonable to warn people that AA, which by its very nature will include vulnerable people, may attract those who wish to exploit? Of course. As other PPs have said, however, those who go to AA are at least attempting to address problems and lifestyle choices. Which in themselves are damaging to their children. This isn't an alternative family trip out when the soft play looks busy.

Saying that any organisation is deliberately recruiting children for the purposes of abuse is something very different. Such allegations belong to the police, and making them in a place such as this is potential libel. I am not disputing your allegtions. I have no way of knowing if youn people have been abused as a consequan e of their parents' involvement with AA, although tragically I think it's inevitable. Fewer than those harmed in some way because their parents drink? Who knows, and it's a tasteless calculation toeven consider.

I have no axe to grind. I have never been to an AA meeting. This is not an AA thread. It has, however, helped me and many others to address our own misuse of alcohol and thereby substantially increase our children's welfare.

If, as you claim, you are motivated solely to protect children, then perhaps you will consider the harmful effects of threatening the source of support for parents which this thread represents.

Apologies for typos. Am off to enjoy a hangover-free Saturday lie in and day with my young children, which a few months ago seemed unattainable.

Is there room for another little one on the bus??? I have been lurking for months and you seem a friendly bunch.

I have finally accepted that I have to stop drinking. I am actually in pain and am beside myself as to what damage I have done.

Does anyone have any tips on things to do besides stopping drinking to actually help my liver get better??

So, day 1....

Have a good weekend everyone x

Morning Sharpkat

You're in the right place for support, keep posting!

Hmmm, livers? Well, you could try milk thistle which is supposed to be good for cleaning and protecting the liver (lots of alcoholics use it whilst drinking hoping that it'll stop the inevitable), it has also been used for inflammation of the liver and treatment of liver disease by those who prefer alternative/complimentary treatments. I have no idea how effective it is btw! Also, lots of dark green veg is apparently good for the liver too - spinach, for example. Apart from that, drink lots of water to flush your system out. If you're going to abstain from alcohol then it's a good idea to drink lots of fluids to begin with anyway, as your body is used to lots of fluids going in (bad fluids! ) and sweet things can help get you through cravings as your body will be used to having a high blood sugar count from the alcohol.

Best of luck Just say if you have any more questions or need more hints and tips for not picking up that first drink.

But actually... do you mean that you have physical pain in the liver area? The liver itself doesn't contain nerve endings so doesn't 'hurt' as such (I think, I'm not a doctor!).

I had pains too. I spent a long time worrying myself sick about them and eventually got the courage up to go to the doctor and had a liver function test, convinced that I had cancer/cirrhosis. The tests were fine you should probably do the same, but I understand how scary and therefore how difficult it is to make the appointment. Perhaps you cold wait until you've not had a drink for a week or so to get the alcohol out of your system before having a blood test, if you're worried about that showing up on a test?

Morning SharpKat. My realisation that I needed help to stop drinking came on Saturday a morning 7 months ago. Having people to talk to who'd experienced the same things, felt the way really helped in the first weeks. My emotions were all over the place, and everything seemed so bleak. I'm now in such a better place and have been able to cope with all kinds of personal and professional challenges that occurred since. Be kind to yourself. Eat well, keep warm and comfortable and just take a day at a time.

Hello all, thank you all so much for your messages and suggestions. I know it seems like I am failing at every hurdle but I am feeling that little bit stronger every time I read you all, so it is not wasted words at all.

I went out and had a couple of drinks, I did not get drunk and avoided the offlicense on the way home and got straight into bed. I woke up feeling refreshed and happy that I had seen my friends and could remember it all. This is what I want my life to be like....however obviously I am struggling with this so am not going to kid myself.

Soooo once again, there is no alcohol in my house, DH has been told not to buy any if I ask and this WILL be my day one of not drinking.

Hi. I'm fairly new to MN and discovered this thread the other day. I've been thinking about what to write ever since - I've actually woken up some days thinking about it! That's because I was amazed to find that something like this exists and that there are so many other people who appear to 'get' what drinking is like for me. I drink too much and think about drink too much. I've had a problem controlling my drinking for 10 years but have drunk too much for longer. I say 10 years because can actually remember it occurring to me that I had just bought some bottles of wine that I didn't want to buy and that worried me. That's how things have been ever since. I don't know if I'm an alcoholic, I don't know what it means really. I know I drink when I don't want to, I obsess over it and I have feelings of guilt over it. I rarely get drunk enough to make me ill, it doesn't affect my work or family life and I don't wake up not knowing what's happened. I know that AA would say "yet..." (I went to a couple of meetings once). I have a tiny, beautiful DS now. I don't want him to have a mummy who drinks a bottle of wine every night (this is what I'd like to do) and slurs how much she loves him (shudder) but I really worry that this is what's going to happen. I haven't had a drink for four days but I'll probably have some wine tonight as we have friends coming over. I managed fairly well during pregnancy but not so well since, even though I'm BFing . There have been a couple of times that I've drunk a whole bottle of wine - I'm so ashamed to say that. I'm making a massive effort not to drink much now until I stop feeding him (and beyond hopefully). I think this looks like a good place to get some encouragement. I've never spoken about this to anyone. I tried to tell DH once and chickened out as he looked at me like I'd got two heads. He likes a drink and agreed that we should cut down but I could tell he hadn't a clue what I meant when I said Iwas worried I liked drinking too much. It's good but scary to get this off my chest.

Hello sharpkat, starmucks, kandinsky and MrsT.

I haven't got the hang of typing on new phone so excuse my general illiteracy.

MrsT, I am sitting feeding my youngest as I type. I've flirted around saying it in here, but the main thing which pushed me into finding this thread a few months ago was the fact that I was really struggling not to drink even though BF. I feel terrible about it too, but there've been too many occasions where I've done the same as you.

My DH is lovely, but doesn'tvreally get it. He suggests buying mini bottles of wine so that I just have a glass. Since being on here I've had the revelation thar some people really do just want a glass. They don't set put knowing that there's at least a bottle ahead and anything less is a waste of time!

There are some amazing people on here and some fantastic support. I'm the most consistently sober I'be been in my adult life other than when pregnant and just trying one day at a time not to slip backwards. Had an emergency dash to a& e with the baby last night and feel so lucky I hadn't been drinking. Didn't even want to have a drink once I got back to get over it - am trying not to read too
Much into that but really hope it's a teeny tiny sign my thinking is starting to change.

Waves to everyone else. Golly, you sound so good - well done on your 37 days!

Morning All

Feeing good today, have slept well, and am really looking forward to the weekend!!!
Welcome to the new babes.

I also drank whilst breastfeeding , like you mrst. I would start with firm resolution to only have one glass, but would finish the bottle. I would die a little inside everytime I did it, but I think that then became part of the problem, I had so little self esteem and self worth, that I became desensitised to my own worst behaviour. It was not an every day, or even an every week thing, but it did happen more than I care to think about.
I stopped breastfeeding at 6months, and there was that sense of - good, now I can drink what I like!!

Am very pleased and relieved to report that my DS is a strapping 9 year old, with absolutely no signs of ill effect from it - much to my constant relief.

Well - shockingly - for Scotland - it's raining again!!!! Will it ever stop, after such a positive April, it has really gone downhill. My stepmom has just been on Skype asking what clothes to bring for her holiday. Our Summer temps appear to be about the same as their winter ones! Not fair.

So busy weekend planned, so I had better get my butt in the shower.
Love to all
Bafana

The most useful thing anyone said to me when I stopped drinking was I didn't need to map out my whole life without alcohol. That completely took the pressure off for me and underscored the principle of one day at a time. Like you Mrs T, I haven't discussed how I feel with DP and I certainly never broached the subject of my drinking. It's not that he's a big drinker or that he wouldn't understand, it was because I didn't understand my drinking, why I did it and why it had such a devastating emotional impact on me. You don't have to drink tonight Mrs T if you don't want too. You can say that your giving your system a rest because you're finding BF very demanding. What I have discovered if that people who have a problem with me not drinking tend to be those who have an uncertain relationship with alcohol themselves. I ignore the comments and smile to myself knowing that in the morning I'll have both a clear head and conscience.

Hi MrsT

I drank a few times when breastfeeding too. Not daily, but to excess more than once. I gave up breastfeeding dd2 at 3 months because the millennium new year's ever was approaching and I wanted to get hammered, terrible, isn't it! You know, whatever you've done there are people who have done worse.

Talldrink - thanks, I feel good! I have a choir performance this afternoon and it's great to not have spent all week worrying about whether or not I'll make it, which I would have done in the past because I wouldn't have known how hungover I might be. I'm quite looking forward to it now but first I have to face Tesco...

MILK THISTLE for liver damage.

Just a quick post, off to catch up, morning xx

Morning Babes

Firstly, I have reported both posts by Purple and Anti. I see that after I had gone to bed, yet more of the same appeared.

Nice.

Anyway, I've wasted enough time on that.

A HUGE welcome to MrsT (I'm a huge fan of your husband ) and to Sharpkat. Lovely to meet you both. I see you're in good hands already.

Golly - Bloody well done on 37 days!! Woop-woop you!

Tall - Thank you for posting this morning. I found your post much more articulate than any of mine. You got the point across brilliantly. It's nice to see you back

Morning, bafana, starmucks and kandi.

Sharpkat Hi and welcome -I lurked for ages and am so glad I hopped on the bus !
Re: Liver
Are you in physical pain ?-it is possible to feel pain if the liver is swollen because the liver capsule(covering) is stretched although often even in advanced liver damage there can be no signs at all. The good news is the liver can regenerate and recover .
Avoid paracetamol and eat a well balanced diet .Excess alcohol depletes vitamins from the body- particularily the B vitamins so a good vitamin supplement can help.I would suggest seeing your GP- remember this is confidential .
If you mean emotional pain- you mention the worry that you may have damaged yourself again I would suggest you see your GP and keep posting here -I wish I had hopped on the bus sooner .I felt so alone but now I know I can come over here
BTW I am a HCP and in a way this made me feel worse -I knew the damage I might be doing and this made me feel even lower and alone. Your GP will be supportive and if they are not ask to see a different one !

OK, I really hate confrontation, and so I have stayed out of this, but, I feel really fed up that you are making me feel like this Antidenial and so I am reporting you too.

I am loathe to give you any further thread space but Antidenial and PBR you have both made your contributions. They have been acknowledged.

If you have something to share regarding your experience of concern about your drinking habits then do come back to this thread which is a support for individuals who are trying a variety of ways that work for them to address, or consider addressing, concerns they have about their drinking of alcohol. If not, please accept that all the posters and lurkers on this thread have read your concerns and do not need to have them repeated.

This thread will not be derailed by your attempts to distract. I will not acknowledge any further contribution from either of you and will report anything that does undermine the purpose of this thread - others may choose to engage further with you, report you or just ignore you.

Exactly JWIM I was too incensed to make sense
I shall not acknowledge any further contribution from Antidenial or PBR.

Antidenial - I am the one who is reporting YOU. All of your posts have been reported. I see that you ignored my request after all.

Not a huge surprise I guess but let me tell you this... each time you post on here, I will report you. I'm going to contact MNHQ and ask that they keep an eye on here for you popping up and spouting, yes, spouting your horrible posts about child/teen rape within AA, caused by AA or whatever else you decide to blame AA for, and ask that they are removed.

Each time you post a link, I will report you. You are damaging all of the hard work I and others have put into this thread to make posters feel that they can be totally honest and not be judged for their decisions.

You are putting all of that at risk.

Why?

What is it that you want here?

No-one is interested in YOU or YOUR posts.

PLEASE LEAVE US ALONE.

Mouse - I am not around for long, but I am applauding your effort on behalf of us all. Thank you, lots - I am always grateful to you but especially so for this.

I am an AA member - because I "desire to stop drinking" - and when I was at absolute crisis point I tried to go to my first, OPEN, meeting with my DD, and was turned away. Because of the swearing. Despite my DD, then 3, being asleep.

AA has meant that - I have my DD in my life, I am recovering, I have friends, I have my job. Otherwise I would have nothing. There is more of my story but it is not for here, publicly.

I have been to a fair few meetings where there are babies. They are distracting, because I'd rather snuggle someone else's baby than face the issues that are there within my sobriety, but I support their mother's right to be there, given all that has happened for them.

And if all I do is have a safe sober cuddle - then that's something good.

Will post to all later

xx esp to Mouse and any others who are struggling,