function of husband

[binemptier]

Please, can someone clarify for me any useful functions of my husband?

He was good at impregnation, and I have no complaints about his role as father, but I really can't see what it is that I personally gain from him as a husband.

He makes money, but I could cope quite well without it, IYSWIM.

He looks after the children sometimes while I dye my hair. But I'm sure I'd cope.

He had a token task, to empty the bin. Since I'm fucked off with asking him to do it, and it getting so full I then need to clean the crap off the bin lid, I have relived him of that duty.

He won't rub my back, and I really don't want sex.

So, what is he actually supposed to be for? I see that single people sometimes want one, but I can't see that they are use nor ornament.

sadly, this is a genuine question.

Also, he's not horrible or anything, and bit annoying on occasion, but not abusive or anything like that.

Binemptier, I am SO glad you got out. (It's Hecate btw). I obviously am not happy that you had a miserable time but I am pleased that you made the decision to get out. I think given all you described, it was the right choice.

I am thrilled for you that you have met someone worthy of you and you are enjoying the relationship you always had a right to have.

Whoops! I should learn to read all thread! Good luck OP and congrats!!

Yes to a "what happened after you LTB' thread.
I'll most certainly contribute

Oh wow that's amazing

Great update. :)
Always glad to see how things turn up (nosy ).

I was almost going to post in your defence, given how shitty some pps were originally and was really happy to see that you have moved on and are very happy now.

Well, I left the bastard (before MN) and don't regret it one second.

He's for me. He has my back. He's there to listen, support, make me laugh, hold my hand, talk me through things, for me to admire and respect and just love him.

That's beautiful. How wonderful for you.

Fab update!
Well done OP on getting out and getting the life that every one of us deserves.
It's that kind of update that gives people hope and strength.

This thread reminds me of my all time favourite Guardian Women headline:

Who needs a Man when you have an Electric Screwdriver.

It is useful to have a husband that does things, but they also need to be someone you like to be with.

Brilliant update. It has given me a smile for the rest of the day

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/2257048-After-you-LTB-surviving-and-thriving

I'm so pleased to hear you took the plunge- well done you!

Have nt you answered your own question, at counselling you were told you do nt let any one do anything for you.

You need to examine that, and try to connect with your husband, have some fun together, a walk, cinema anything.forget the housework and go out.

And if you do nt mind me saying are suffering from depression ? Surely you have nt always felt like this.

RTFT Northern

Oh my goodness what a wonderful update. I'm very happy for you!

Have a wonderful Christmas

Great update, well done you (for getting out) and fantastic to hear you no longer need to ask the question cus you have the answer!

Ah well done OP what great news! I hadn't looked at the dates was just reading the thread then saw your update on how life has changed with a lovely partner.
I've been clinging onto a dying relationship for 6 months now, knowing he doesn't care for me like he should, but trying to convince myself otherwise.
Your post is helping me to make that final decision to let the whole thing go. Very pleased for you.

Wow I almost envy you. When I tea the first post I didn't notice the date and almost answered to say you're not alone and my DH won't rub my back either - I miss that in a relationship. He can't rub my back without it leading me sex and he often doesn't reply to me when I talk to him, so I could identify with your comment about him not noticing if you stop talking.

It's really nice to hear you've got what you deserve and what I want

I think life is like a balloon. Sometimes when your dreams are falling to the ground you need someone else to bump them up into the air again

Inspiring post. Am another one who has a husband that only wants to rub my back if it will lead to sex! Weirdly also glued to his phone. Spending yet another day feeling undervalued and belittled - it's good to know people can change their destiny...

Oh. It's like, 7 years. And I'm still as happy as that.

I came back for something else and this was still here as 'I'm on'.

Sometimes things work out alright.

We still have that respectful relationship of fun and friendship.

My XH is a way better ex than he was a husband. My kids thrive.

Please no one stay in this heap I used to be in.

It's possible to be happy. Out you will be happier. I don't promise a fairytale, but I can testify that it wasn't that I was unloveable.

Well done @binemptier and glad you're doing well.

Based solely on this thread, he just wasn't adding anything to your life and his attitude to sex was a turn off. xxx

Can I just say that this is a very inspiring story @binemptier