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Original poster

Smacking - how your parents did it?

274 replies

notalreadyinuse · 15/03/2011 21:29

  • [Message from MNHQ - please note, this thread was started in 2011]

I assume that most people who were young children in the 70s were smacked by their parents, but a thread today reminded me about something that has been bothering me.

My dad always pulled my pants down to smack me - until about the age of 8 I think when I think the smacking mostly stopped.

I wondered if this was "normal" then?

Namechanged for this one...

OP posts:
Sarahlouisewest19 · 28/03/2016 01:09

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

MissBeaHaving · 28/03/2016 01:33

No it is not right for your parents to hit you with anything no matter what you've done,do you have an adult you can speak to about this?

LucyBabs · 28/03/2016 01:48

Born early 80's and my Mam would very occasionly slap the backs of my legs. Although I can count on one hand how many times. Always for very serious things too. My Dad used to raise his hand as if to slap us but he had huge hands and we set off running if we saw the raised hand!

With my own dc.. My dd is 7 and I've slapped her bum once when she ran out on to the road when she was 3. My ds is 4 and I have slapped his hand a few times when he went through his slapping everyone in the face stage he was old enough to know if you hit someone it hurts and isn't allowed. I have taught my dc If someone hits you defend yourself, if that means hitting back then so be it..

Anyway! No I would never never humilate my dc by touching their private parts and slapping them and because they were bold..

minatiae · 28/03/2016 02:01

Some of these stories are just heartbreaking and horrifying. My parents NEVER hit me, and I never realised the extent of what happens when parents did, I know some of my friends parents smacked them but I never imagined it was as abusive as what is described here.

I would never ever hit my children.

A boyfriend hit me and I left immediately, just that once makes me feel nervous around someone who seems angry. I can't imagine how awful it must be to feel that fear of your own parents. Just horrible.

ExtraHotLatteToGo · 28/03/2016 02:53

ZOMBIE THREAD

Resurrected by a troll ...be wary of any socks it might have left behind,

MissBeaHaving · 28/03/2016 03:04

ExtaHot I did notice it was a zombie thread but as it was resurrected by Sarah who says she is only 12 years old,I wanted to post the child-line link just incase.

goddessofsmallthings · 28/03/2016 07:30

You're absolutely right to have done so as it's invariably better to be safe than sorry, Bea

SarahLouise may or may not be a troll but, in any event, if this page appears on a google search undertaken by a child who is being physically abused no-one's time can said to have been wasted here.

ExtraHotLatteToGo · 28/03/2016 09:43

Yes. Perfectly fine, I wasn't saying it wasn't. However, for more than one reason it would probably be best if this ZOMBIE THREAD was now left to go back to sleep.

Sweetheartyparty76 · 28/03/2016 10:32

Born in 1976 and I had a few smacked bums over clothes from my mam. It was always deserved and always when she was at the end of her tether with us. I probably got smacked from my dad too but can't remember a specific occasion.
Once, I was caught playing chicken on the road when I was about 5. A woman driver caught me and smacked me all the way home and my mam thanked her and I got another smack. I never did it again but they were very different times.
My nana smacked me when i was very young because of jealously of my mam taking dad from her. My mam caught me kicking back and I got smacked. My mam didn't want to punish me as I told her why I did it but she did because I can't hit my elders. I had a very happy, loving upbringing with perhaps a bit too much respect for my elders but I grew up a pretty good kid because of it x

Sweetheartyparty76 · 28/03/2016 10:34

Oops I didn't see the zombie thread alert x

queenoftheuniverse · 28/03/2016 10:36

Born in 79, my brother 83

We got smacked loads, round the face and everything so this was 80's and early 90's.

Once my dad hit me so hard in the face it bruised my eye. i was 14 I remember telling people at school I'd "walked into a door"

AngrySad

Eustace2016 · 28/03/2016 10:49

Definitely not. In the 1960s my parents campoaigned against physical punishment. I remember my father receiving a regular newsletter from an organisation I think was called STOPP.

Mouseinahole · 28/03/2016 10:55

I was born in 1944 and was never really smacked. Dad once put me over his knee but I struggled and ran upstairs (I was about 8). About half an hour later he came up, he had been out and bought me a comic! We both said sorry and that was it though he threatened a few times if I was cheeky. Mum threatened occasionally but never touched me! I remember her standing at the bottom of the stairs with a broom stick shouting "Come here and I'll kill you!" We both burst out laughing and that was that.
My own dd were born in the 70s and there was a very occasional single slap nothing else.

BishopBrennansArse · 28/03/2016 10:55

I recall (and confirmed by DM) being smacked 3 times in my entire childhood, twice by DM and once by Dad. Nothing after the age of 5.

All on legs through clothing and all as a result of something dangerous (run in front of car, messing with Rayburn).

Born in '78

dogsnotsprogs · 28/03/2016 10:58

I was born in '98 and was smacked/hit as a child.

At ages of 13-17, I had many many arguments with my parents and my mum was the worst.

I was pushed against the wall with her hands around my throat and I've been in a few fights with my mum, where we have slapped each other and she's kicked me whilst I was on the floor.

I don't see what's so shocking about children hitting their parents if they have been hit themselves. If my parents aren't going to respect me, I'm not going to respect them or allow them to hit me and take their anger out on me.

BishopBrennansArse · 28/03/2016 11:00

Bugger missed the zombie, soz

purplefizz26 · 28/03/2016 11:08

My parents smacked me, only in the 90's too! My friends were too by their parents.
I have a good relationship with my parents and it hasn't affected me, but now I have a child of my own I am gobsmacked that it ever was considered ok.
My daughter pushes my buttons at times and I shout but I would never lay a finger on her, ever.
So glad times have changed in this respect.

Feilin · 28/03/2016 11:15

My dad did most of the slapping and hitting up until I was about 14 . He used to slap me round the back of the head unprovoked saying I was " thinking about it" never did know what I was supposed to be thinking about . Mum slapped me a right zinger across the face because I got detention for doing my geography homework incorrectly. The only detention I ever got and it was because I did a bar graph instead of a line graph. No amount of protesting that I had technically done it saved me that day. My sister got slapped by my dad once and she turned out to be the one who did everything she shouldn't have lmao.

WhingyNinja · 28/03/2016 11:34

This thread is making me feel sick, have a hug crystaldolphin, that sounds fucking horrendous.

I was born in 1990 and my mums partner used to smack my bare bum too, then moved onto emotional abuse when I was a teenager and only stopped when I physically attacked him back at 13 and moved out!

I look over at my DD now and never want her to feel the way I felt, smacking children is NOT okay in my opinion, adults are supposed to be role models, not volatile abusers.

DanyellasDonkey · 28/03/2016 11:50

My mother used to smack me on the back of my legs, often in public.

My father was the one who smacked me for "really serious offences" and that was on my bare bum and often so sore that I couldn't sit down afterwards Sad

CraigRevelHorwoodsPetCat · 28/03/2016 11:55

I got the pants down "hammering" for want of a better word. From I was about three. This escalated to smacks around the face - I'm 25 with my own child and my father still doesn't hesitate to lift his hand to me if I dare disagree with him

It's utterly horrific Sad

RJnomore1 · 28/03/2016 12:04

Yep pants down. Belt from dad if I had been particularly bad (read cheeky, I was not a badly behaved child). Belted across the face once or twice while standing quietly next to my mum because other children were misbehaving.

All accompanied by the biblical quote "spare the rod and spoil the child".

scarletthollie5 · 28/03/2016 12:43

Brings back literally painful memories. Beaten with sticks, pans whatever was to hand Welts on arms legs. Not on face as did not want it to show. Terrorised over small things step father would turn on us myself and older sister . Never hit his children just us. Daily emotional abuse. My mum step father and two half siblings moved when l was 15 . I stayed never regretted it. Only recently l have acknowledged the long term damage it has done to me.

CherryBlossom321 · 28/03/2016 12:44

"It didn't do me any harm." Exactly what what I used to say for years (and truly believed!) until I had a breakdown 2 years ago.

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