24/40 & DH is leaving.

[deepbluewave]

Hi ladies,

Im not sure what advice I am after here, or just some wordy wisdom and advice on men.

Im 24 weeks pregnant, with our first baby. We have been together for 6 years and married for 2. WE were trying to get pregnant for 10 months and in the last 7 months, DH has become distant, cold, unsympathetic and more importantly-really boring!
After this causing me to break down-he admits he doesnt feel the same way about me, admits he has changed and doesnt feel we have a future.

I have now arranged to move home to family, 150miles away and transferred my job.

I feel happier about mine and babies future, around family, friends, and secure that the disruption, occurs now, rather than when baby is older....

but..

Its quite a rash change of feelings..is it likely he regret this, once it is too late??

Also, when he comes to visit, he will be on the sofa, in my flat. How long can we do that for-before it is unfair to me?

Help please!

Don't feel bad if he stays in a tent.

And don't get involved in any discussion about where the tent will be pitched.

Not in your garden, or your families. If he wants to camp there are campsites he can use.

Maybe send him a few links to some.

My DH also doesn't really "get" it when I'm pregnant. He doesn't get all excited about the new baby or want to feel my tummy. But he is kind to me.

No amount of confusion will ever justify what he's doing now.

family's

I totally second and applaud chip's posts on this thread

I am loving the way, OP, you have gained realisation and strength from this thread

You are not a 2nd class citizen that is impelled to always be the one making things smooth for him

you and baby from now, he is but a bit-part

how much of a bit-part is entirely up to him now, and how much his mealy-mouthed words translate into actions

Sorry to crash in late but i have to say you were being maybe a tad too reasonable at the start and now seem to be toughening and wising up a bit.
Its great to be reasonable and adult about things but that doesnt mean you have to be taken for a ride.
When an adult chooses to walk out on his wife and unborn child then it will often cause them some inconvenience eg. loss of home ,not as much contact,loss of 2 incomes no family hols etc etc.
It will cause the other partner a lot more inconvenience tho.
You are going to be the main carer and therefore have the most say in what happens with regards to contact etc and i dont think id be letting him take my young baby on holiday but thats for you to decide.

My exh left us all just before xmas 8yrs ago for ow.He rocked up boxing day to enjoy some of ledkrs legendary xmas hosptality (i always have a massive party)I showed him the front door with the pointy toe of my boot

If he camps in your yard or at a campsite even, he will be using your bathroom, your washer, eating your food, watching your tv. He'd be in and out of your house all day long. Your privacy would be nonexistent. He'd be using your towels, soap, hot water, electricity, messing up your kitchen. Your parents shouldn't be subjected to that either. I too would like to see you go now, or at least he finds someplace else to stay til March 19.