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Original poster

Would you be OK about this?

95 replies

SaggyHairyArse · 07/02/2011 11:53

If your DH went to help your cousins husband move house and they discussed anal sex and then went on to discuss in a detailed and intimate context their enjoyment of anal sex via MSN and email over a period of months, how OK would you be about that?

OP posts:
Original poster
SaggyHairyArse · 07/02/2011 21:37

Quite Coffee,I would rather I did not know too! That being said, you don't shit in your own backyard do you and this 'relationship' with my cousins DH is entirely inappropriate.

OP posts:
ScarlettWalking · 07/02/2011 21:45

Very very odd indeed. I can only think they wanked over these protracted online conversations.

Sorry OP how on earth do you know your DAD thinks it's normal?

Original poster
SaggyHairyArse · 07/02/2011 21:48

Sorry, my Dad DOESN'T think blokes carrying on like this is normal. I know that because I rang him and asked him Hmm

OP posts:
QueeferSutherland · 07/02/2011 21:48

Is she/ are you sure it is your ExH, not just someone else regestered under his name?

Original poster
SaggyHairyArse · 07/02/2011 22:06

Yes,cos I asked him.

OP posts:
AnyFucker · 07/02/2011 22:11

saggy...what was exH's "explanation" for such utterly skanky behaviour ?

Original poster
SaggyHairyArse · 07/02/2011 22:17

Well, he said that it started as a bit of smutty bloke talk, they then shared pornos which then went on to what they like in terms of men giving it to women up the bum and some other stuff. He says it got 'heavy'...

To be honest I probably cut him short as I said his personal life was none of my business and that I would apreciate it if he needed to share this info he found a random on the internet and not my cousins husband.

OP posts:
AnyFucker · 07/02/2011 22:19

heavy ?

wtf is that a euphemism for ? Hmm

christ, you are best off out of it, what a pity he is making that so difficult by involving members of your family

ScarlettWalking · 07/02/2011 22:27

it got "heavy" what does he mean by that?

AnyFucker · 07/02/2011 22:29

kikijane ...you might just have to eat your words, love Hmm

Original poster
SaggyHairyArse · 07/02/2011 22:42

I've got no idea about the heavy stuff, like I said I cut him short. He did say that nothing physical actually happened between them. Who knows what is the truth? I just needed to drum home the point that a bit of discretion wouldn't go amiss.

Family dramas have a habit of biting you on the arse and I don't want my kids to find out about this ever!

My ex is a dysfunctional (obviously) and flawed man and I spent far too long hung up on him and his issues and I can't be arsed with it.

The blokes (ex and cousins husband) seem to think it is 'normal' blokey behaviour, I idn't think so and consulted Dad and BF and MN to see if I was the freak for raising an eyebrow.

OP posts:
AnyFucker · 07/02/2011 22:47

no, you are not the freak, be assured of that

mummiehunnie · 07/02/2011 22:49

An average hetro man would not find this normal behaviour, from my understanding!

YankNCock · 07/02/2011 23:09

In the interest of gathering hetero male opinion, I asked DH. He said 'after a few beers down the pub you might have a bit of a laugh with your mates about if you'd had a wander up "Cadbury Alley", but that's about it'

He reckons only a 'weirdo' would go on about it for so long.

HTH Grin

UnderTheRadar2212 · 07/02/2011 23:26

Is the said 'weirdo' had never had an experience of giving it to somebody (I don't mean a bloke either!) up the marmite motorway then yes, they might well go on about it for so long if it's one of their fantasy things to do.

Many lads I know go on about it, whilst joking about with their mates 'does your missus take it up the arse?' ha ha ha' etc.

I really don't know WHAT the attraction is but it's just boys being boys in my view. My ex was always on about 'bend over love' and I told him 'you stick that up there, you get it back with a pair of red hot GHD's mate!'

bubblewrapped · 07/02/2011 23:48

Does anyone know the content of the pornos that they were swapping. I still think there is something really really dodgy about this behaviour.

Again, fair enough, blokes do swap pornos with each other.. tacky as it is. And may say "you wanna see the bit where he ..... that was a right turn on" but not an in-depth swapping of fantasies and such in long emails.. that is just odd. Very odd.

ItsGraceAgain · 07/02/2011 23:54

Argh. Once again, you're talking about juvenile, fnarr-fnarr, pub talk and nudges. These two men have formed a relationship, based solely on the matter of bumsex and sharing videos of same. A one-topic relationship.

Honestly, you can't see the difference?

Having said that, I wouldn't be too thrilled if my partner spent much of his pub time swapping bumsex jokes with his mates. No, wait, that was XH#1. I wasn't too thrilled. Your cousin has my condolencies, OP :(

Original poster
SaggyHairyArse · 08/02/2011 00:06

The porn is men giving it to women up the arse.

My cousin has already had one failed marriage and I think she thought her DH was the real deal but he has fucked up in numerous ways over recent years.

Having got out of a rubbish marriage myself,I know there is no point me telling her what to do as she has to work that out for herself but you can't help but wonder how much shit someone can take :(

OP posts:
KikiJane · 08/02/2011 00:14

Hahahaha, AF Grin

Were that the case, I would be happy to do so.

UnderTheRadar2212 · 08/02/2011 00:18

Saggy, if that's the case, I really don't think the anal sex smut is the first & foremost issue to be concentrated on in that household is it?

I'd have been more concerned if it was bloke bumsex vids they were swapping etc.

Many blokes fantasise about doing that to their women, it's a 'dominance' thing & it's part of their makeup!Smile

StuffingGoldBrass · 08/02/2011 00:21

I appreciate that you want to support your cousin who is having problems with her H but that ought to be the limit of your involvement. Your XP is your XP and whatever his sex life might involve now, it's nothing to do with you.
Even if he and your cousin's H are having an affair, it's up to your cousin and her H to sort that out, it is not the business of the rest of the family to stick their beaks in.

mummiehunnie · 08/02/2011 00:23

SHA, I notice in your posts there is a lot of anal talk from you in a general type of way...

Your posting name has Arse

You describe as bad things as Shit someone can take

biting you on the arse is another phrase you used...

Original poster
SaggyHairyArse · 08/02/2011 00:36

LOL, MH! Just coincidental turns of phrases, nothing more to it than that. By the by, my NN is just a play on my starsign and a long standing term of endearment between an old friend who shares the same starsign.

And SGB, other than asking my ex to have the decency to tell me whether there was a physical relationship (given there was an overlap between when they started their communications and I asked him to leave) because of STD screening, I have no interest in being involved in the fallout of this tawdry business.

Just wondered what other peoples thoughts would be on this.

OP posts:
UnderTheRadar2212 · 08/02/2011 00:37

Would I be out of order saying if SHA had a PHB (peachy hairless bum) that might be her thinking it'd be less of an issue mummiehunnie?

Grin
mummiehunnie · 08/02/2011 00:41

I think we would all love small, pert and peachy bums, wouldn't we? not that I spend time thinking about my bum on a regular basis, best to ignore how big it is now a days Under the Radar Grin