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Original poster

Sex with strangers!

29 replies

TemptedbyTortureGarden · 18/12/2010 16:02

I'm a prude with a very strict religious background. I can't help feeling that sex outside marriage is wrong, but problem is, I'm not married. I also fancy experimenting a little, but my guilt gets in the way Blush

So I like the idea of experimenting with couples as well as one night stands with guys etc. But where do I find decent men for a one night stand - I can find guys on a dating website but I'm scared that they are too sleazy and irritatingly weak to bother with. I guess I'm wondering where to meet decent blokes who will still treat you with some respect you even though you just want sex?

OP posts:
sobloodystupid · 18/12/2010 16:16

There's no need to go to what might be considered the other extremeSmile. Would a "decent bloke" be interested in just a one night stand with someone who was inexperienced and, forgive me if I'm wrong, quite naive? If you wanted sex only would it matter if he was decent or not?
What is your relationship history for example? Could you see sex as part of a loving relationship that wasn't the marriage commitment? That seems more in line with religious morality rather than no strings sex.
Think carefully before you act and good luck whatever you chose to do.

susiedaisy · 18/12/2010 16:20

Not another troll!

Original poster
TemptedbyTortureGarden · 18/12/2010 16:23

Wink I've rebelled against my guilt a fair bit so whilst I might be a little naive, I'm not quite as inexperienced as I might sound.

It's just that it's always in a relationship (and it is still a rebellious act for me, even in a relationship) and I want to be able to enjoy a bit more fun. Especially as I'm single and don't want to have to wait for a relationship for sex. I want to feel more liberated than that.

I just don't want to have sex with someone I wouldn't want to talk to in everyday life.

OP posts:
Original poster
TemptedbyTortureGarden · 18/12/2010 16:26

I'm not a troll! Confused

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overmydeadbody · 18/12/2010 16:27

Well just use your intuition.

There are decent men out there who are hapopy to have one night stands, obvioulsy.

AnyFuckerForAMincePie · 18/12/2010 16:29

Yu are not that naive if you know about "Torture Garden" Xmas Grin

Heroine · 18/12/2010 16:47

well i have to say that there are men who are really good to be around and who will also go to bed with you and with you to places like torture garden, but you have to be clear with them - flirt with them rather than tell them innermost secrets.. or they will be confused, and whe you sleep with them, tell them that it was great and that you want to do more but don't want a relationship - it may be wierd for them, it may not, but still stick to the story and be nice about it.

also saying 'torture garden' pretty much indicates to them you are going to be open about sex (at least with them if not with everyone) and that should help -

Original poster
TemptedbyTortureGarden · 18/12/2010 16:50

But not been there yet AnyFucker...Xmas Grin

Heroine - that's a good point.

Know anywhere I can meet a guy like that?!

OP posts:
Heroine · 18/12/2010 16:50

Oh and don't buy the nasty sterotype that all men on dating sites are inadequate - that, I'm afraid is both a ppwerplay by women who want to be more in control of the dating agenda, and by men who want to minimise the numbers of men on them so they can stand tall... the dating game is full of lies and BS about what doing one thing or another means about you. Also jsut ask a guy you like if he wants to have sex with you one day .. I have done this and the answer was a grin and a yes

AnyFuckerForAMincePie · 18/12/2010 16:52

then good luck to you, TBTG

just take care, no matter how you go about getting what you want

Original poster
TemptedbyTortureGarden · 18/12/2010 16:53

You've said that to a guy you liked? Not surprised by his answer to be fair. I might try that Xmas Grin

OP posts:
Original poster
TemptedbyTortureGarden · 18/12/2010 16:56

So can a single go to TG and meet people there?

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OlderAndMoreStupid · 18/12/2010 17:01

Absolutely. I haven't been to TG but I've been to quite a few other "fetish" clubs. Everyone is very respectful of eachother and single women don't get hassled (it's against the rules). Me and my then partner used to go for the music, the great atmosphere and these clubs tend to attract slightly alternative types, but a lot of them do very normal things in the day-time! Also a great opportunity to dress up and show off. I loved it!

Taghain · 18/12/2010 17:58

well, when you meet men from ordinary dating sites you will be able to judge whether they are sleazy or not.
Don't tell them beforehand you're only after sex and you may weed out the sleaziest.
Then as Heroine says, just ask.
Most men will answer yes, some won't, but you have nothing to lose.

oldraver · 18/12/2010 22:38

The only rules for going to TG is that you dress appropriately (or not) for the night, but that can mean anything that your mind desires

I did used to think the naked guy who just used to stand there wanking should of put some kind of outfit on

StuffingGoldBrass · 18/12/2010 23:41

Both fetish clubs and swingers' clubs welcome single people, both are generally a pretty safe environment for experimenting with one's sexuality (a lot safer than going on the pull in a pub or straight nightclub).
People in these clubs also tend to be more upfront about their preferences, so while someone might ask you if you want to have sex they will usually take a polite refusal with good grace (if not, you can always appeal to the club crew).
Torture Garden is not a sex club, as such, though - if you want sex (rather than kinky sex/play) there are other good places in and around London, where I am guessing you are based if you are thinking of going to TG, you can PM me for recommendations if you like.

Original poster
TemptedbyTortureGarden · 19/12/2010 02:46

Well I did it!! I went out and kind of fancied a uni mate of my friend who asked me if I wanted to take him home, so I did. Clear cut - just sex - so no complications! However, I'm sure there's better sex out there.

SGB what would I find at TG? Kinky play that doesn't involve sex? Are there separate rooms etc? Would people understand if I felt a bit nervous?

OP posts:
StuffingGoldBrass · 19/12/2010 08:24

Have PM's you OP

sobloodystupid · 19/12/2010 13:55

Torture Garden? Clearly I am the naive one Grin

Original poster
TemptedbyTortureGarden · 19/12/2010 14:02

Xmas Grin @sobloodystupid. My name (and yours?!) says it all hehe

Saying that, I'm still a newbie to this kind of thing..

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Original poster
TemptedbyTortureGarden · 19/12/2010 14:04

oldraver did he have a tissue in his other hand? Not really up for the spraying jizz club

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AnyFuckerForAMincePie · 19/12/2010 14:36

standing naked and wanking ?

is that turn on for some people ? Xmas Confused

it just seems like monumental bad fucking manners to me...

AnyFuckerForAMincePie · 19/12/2010 14:37

or like a scene from "One flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest" Xmas Hmm

whatever floats ya boat

Malificence · 19/12/2010 14:38

Yes I'd assume a person who did that was mentally ill too.

RumourOfAHurricane · 19/12/2010 14:43

This reply has been deleted

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