Op , this really isnt ok. Presumably he sees the house / car as " ours " but his wages as his own . I know people are saying tell him this , insist on that , i presume youve tried and tried to no avail, hence you posting on here. I sympathise , mine wouldnt budge either , like you , i wanted a solution.
There wasnt one , because it really isnt about money at all, its about them feeling more entitled , having you be answerable to him so he can question you like a child while they feel in control. Its just symbolic of deeper problems , and it IS financial abuse and controlling behaviour. He doesnt see you as an equal.
My advice is to talk to him again. Failing that , i would take a long hard honest look at how the rest of my marriage is , and i would seek counselling. My EH earned very well, like you we didnt get tax credits , and even the CB was paid into his account . Now im divorcing him , im a full time student living off grants , i know theres a big thing about how hard it is being a single parent / student, but i honestly feel rich ! Again , i dont beleive that this is the only problem in your marriage , whether your aware of it or not.