Do you think they ever leave their wives

[kittya]

Some one I know (not too personally, thank god) has been seeing a MM, if you can call it seeing, the odd night every other month for Nine, yes, nine years. I just got too wondering, now his dc are at 6th form age, will he leave his wife for her? Or, is there ever a time when they do? Looking at these threads blokes do clear off all the time for OW so, how can it be a myth that men never leave their wifes for OW?

Although, I think nine years is a terrible waste of time!!

I once worked with Someone Very Famous, who had been married for 45ish years to someone who was also Very Famous due to being his wife. He had been having an affair off and on with one particular woman for more than 20 years, but wouldn't leave his wife for her because of the damage that it would do to his career. He eventually did leave his wife for the OW, but the thing that shocked the hell out of me, was that whilst working with me, he had a tacky one-off shag with yet another woman, didn't even try to hide it from our team, and this was only 5 days or so before the announcement making international headlines that he was leaving is wife for the OW. So just how committed was he to the OW, as well? Or can sex really be that meaningless? Or was I/am I just too naive?

Really want to know who that is now....

Oh KiwiKat, clues please !???

No clues - Kiwi's career is at stake. (Although, having recently been made redundant, I am possibly less fearful of losing my career or being reemployed, as in getting sued. These peeps have lottsa money, don't forget, and many are litigious by nature.)

Oh, but the tales I could tell about famous folk! I will namechange soon and drop some salacious, TRUE (and hopefully untraceable) snippets that will whip you all into a frenzy.

[Kiwi laughs darkly, swirls her cloak and exits, stage left.]

My parents have a female friend. She had a relationship with a married man for 25 years. All the while he was promising to leave his wife for her. She believed him. She is now childless and way past the menopause and he is still with his wife. The bloke had kids with his wife and was having his cake and eating it for a quarter of a century. The OW is really lonely and sad. Anyone seeing a married man should run a mile IMO.

kittya yeah my DP loved his kids and loved family life (and loves family life with me as well) but he just wasnt in love with his wife anymore.

i do think some MM who have affairs are bored of family life too but then end up back at square one if they go on to have a family with someone else.

How can any man who has a shred of decency allow that to happen......?

allow what to happen valium ?

For a woman to waste her childbearing years with him knowing that he would never leave his wife (if she didn't find out).

I know - it's cruel. If he loved her and respected her at all he should have been honest enough to let her start again with someone new.

Kiwi, Im intrigued!! why were you surprised he had a one of shag?? the bloke Im talking about has a nine year long lover but has one of shags all the time. Just sex, I suppose.

Val, they are so into themselves and have already done the kid thing, they dont want to do it again so, they dont even think of the OW having their children. And if she really wanted them I guess she would go and find someone else.

Kiwicat - sounds like a classic case of, when the mistress replaces the wife, a vacancy opens up...

It sounds like it was just a shag though. Crumbs I cant think of any celebs that have left their wife of 20 years, I must be losing my touch, I usually know all the gossip!!

chris tarrant? or was he booted out when he was caught?

lenny henry? officially mutual and amicable but it was him that wanted it.

He never left Dawn for someone else though.

Maybe Chris Tarrant, he did leave for someone else didnt he? I was thinking more along the lines of huge celebs. Although, I reckon the majority of them are unfaithfull anyway, it just never gets in the press (none of our business really!!).

this has been an interesting thread it seems there is no answer.

kiwi what do you do for a living then?

Women living in hope that "their" MM will leave his wife would do well to remember that when a man marries his mistress, all he does is create a vacancy.

they dont think it will ever happen to them though

I've totted up three of those so far!

Quotes, I mean - not long-term affairs with married men!

Not as exciting as celeb fornication, sorry, this one's just about me. My ex dh left me for the OW, and I was liberated to find out some years later that he was cheating on her, and that he had something of a name for being a lech - meaning that it's what HE does, and that I didn't drive him to it, if you see what I mean. Nearly 20 years and 2 kids later, they're still together, but I can't imagine there's a lot of trust in that relationship, which must be very tiring.

Some men (and women for that matter) just cannot be faithful. I sometimes think the women that learn to take the best from him and turn a blind eye to the rest are the ones who have it sussed. It's not something you can make yourself do if it doesn't feel right though.

Some do leave. I was seeing a man for 6 years he has now left his wife - she didn't find out and kick him out, he left of his own choice. It is unusual though

does she WANT her MM lover to leave his wife?
perhaps this life suits her as well.

God knows. I expect she does. She has married and divorced in this time. If he is waiting until the kids are at uni, she only has four more years to go!