What is it with men and porn?

[AlisonDubois]

Am watching TV in living room. Have just been into kitchen for wine top up. Coming back from kitchen, I peeked into office. DH on pc with something unsavoury on screen. Let's just say, a woman with her head in a very unusual place.
Why do men think it's okay to watch porn on pc metres away from wife watching TV?
I know he watches this shit, but does he really have to do it when I'm in the house. Blokes seem to treat it as normal as watching football.
Can't he at least wait until I'm in bed?
Or are all men so crass regarding porn?

I divorced my first husband because of this.....oh and money stuff.

He remarried someone called Alison.

No it's not normal.

Hmm I have no problem with any fella of mine watching porn (like so long as its not illegal stuff or anything too weird and dodgy) but context is quite important here i'd say. I mean sitting on your own in a (darkened?)room with your wife metres away seems a bit of a waste..he could have either said come and watch this (if you are the type that enjoys some porn!) or seen if he could give you some affection and some actual human contact instead.

But perhaps he just wanted a threeminute 'quickie' and that was the easiest way?

Have another top up, shut the door and forget it or confront him and tell him how this makes you feel. I'd go for the former!

There is nothing worng with either men or women watching porn. I dont see an issue here. If he was watching it in front of you he probably wanted you to come over but knew you were uptight about sex things so wanted to see if you would take the hint.

Sunny, you might want to take your blinkers off - not liking/agreeing with porn has zero to do with being uptight about sex!

Alison, NO, not all men are such wankers and it's not normal, emotionally healthy behaviour.

Cause it is if he objected to you using sex toys, reading erotica etc. He would also be uptight about sex and doesnt appreciate that people like different things and if you arent cheating there isnt a problem.

Most womens issues with porn usually boil down to their own insecuruties/jealousies. Women who have the same body as women with in porn, no stretch marks, cellulite, pretty etc its not usually an issue. Same as men who have no insecurities about penis size arent threatened by vibrators etc.

Perhaps he was just feeling a bit horny and didn't want to disturb you?

No sunny, most intelligent women's objection to porn is political, not personal - and it has absolutely nothing to do with insecurity, jealousy or hang-ups about sex.

Rather than post this utter drivel, why don't you start looking at the political issues about porn and question why you feel the way you do about it?

What so ALL porn is wrong? Dont be ridiculous. I have done work in the sex industry myself and was a willing participant and throughly enjoyed it. Not all women do things because they are forced to and many people are just exhibishionists who enjoy stuff like that.

No I don't think it is 'normal' but unfortunatley viewed as acceptable by some sections of society. My bloke doesnt watch porn for the same reasons as as whenwillIfell normal stated
Sunny, your reasonings are bizarre, I am happy to have sex and confident about my body and looks,but I don't like porn and neither does my bloke. (and who does have the 'same' body as showed in porn anyway?! unless you have a magic airbusher to follow you around and have had your bum hole bleached and bits of labia chopped off to be 'symetrical' ect ect)

My DH likes erotic drawings - very Japanese.
But never when I'm around. He's discrete.
His Dad likes erotic literature (according to my DH).

Don't know what I'd do if there were real alive human beings involved.

I find modern pneumatic porn very simplistic tbh. Very fast food.

I do not find porn in itself wrong, although I do question why any woman would want to degrade herself by participating.
No, I myself do not want to watch it...it does absolutely nothing for me, just leaves me feeling cold and not in the mood at all.
I realise that lots of men, not all, enjoy watching. But I do find it distasteful that DH watches it whilst I am at home. He could at least wait until I am either out somewhere or in bed asleep.
Just pure bad manners on his part I think!

Of course it is rude and disrespectful. i would be distinctly unimpressed.

Sunny- I have been on a thread with you today where you said you had been engaged at eighteen, on active service in the army and married at twenty. When did you get the chance to work in the sex industry?

Yes Sunny, when did you find the time?
Also. as you are on MN I assume you have children. If so, do you plan on telling them your complete 'work' history, or will you airbrush it?

It was working on the lines and it has been whilst I have been married but I also like to do webcam etc recreationally. I dont see the problem with porn tbh. Some porn might be wrong but not all is there are many different kinds eg amateur, lesbian, less rough etc. You cant say everybody that watches porn is 'not engaging in normal, emotional behaviour'

Most men (and many women) enjoy pornography etc. If you dont like it then its up to you and you could ask your husband not to do it in front of you. Maybe it was his way of trying to turn you on but if you didnt like it then fair enough, but dont make out he is abnormal or all of the sex industry/porn is terrible.

if you didnt like it then fair enough, but dont make out he is abnormal or all of the sex industry/porn is terrible.

But Sunny, you stated that OP was uptight for not being in to it, accepting others have different views works both ways!

OP, his behaviour was awful, whether or not you like/dislike porn there was no need for him to use it when you are in the next room, it shows a huge lack of respect.

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