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Original poster

Old Bags No More - The Brave Babes & the Battle with the Booze

982 replies

MoominMags · 15/07/2010 09:26

Well, here we go ladies (and MIFLAW)! The new thread to follow on from JWN's 'me and alcohol have ruined my family'. I hope no one minds that I decided to go with 'brave'? I just think that it describes us!

As a quick recap, I am 33 and on day 22 of sobriety (on this occasion!)

OP posts:
algee · 23/07/2010 11:49

PS, day 14...that's 2 WEEKS if my calculative skills are correct!!!

algee · 23/07/2010 11:50

'styick with iot'

jesuswhatnext · 23/07/2010 11:56

algee! poor spelling is obligatory on here, just see my previous posts for evidence!!!

jesuswhatnext · 23/07/2010 11:58

btw - i know just what you mean about picnics! fancy not having a drink! - we sat at an open air theatre the other week and i noticed that i would have been very much in the minority had i been drinking.

MIFLAW · 23/07/2010 12:02

Wrinkly

Well done on getting through last night.

I used to feel like pubs had magnets inside them for the first few weeks of sobriety and practically stayed housebound in the evenings except to go to meetings. But it gets much easier very quickly.

Algee

Totally agree about how odd it seems when others don't drink. I used to work in various kinds of teaching (uni lecturing in French, TEFL with teenagers and, briefly, secondary French) and I always firmly believed that teaching was a big drinking job. I was astounded that when, as a teacher, I didn't drink, no one cared and that I wasn't alone - and that even the ones who did drink didn't drink that much. I remember one particular staffroom conversation - another teacher said that he would be drinking a bottle of wine that night (it was Friday.) One of the other trainees said, "what? A whole bottle?" Whereas in my head, I was thinking, "What? Is that all?"

Gloupgloup · 23/07/2010 13:00

Hi ! So far so good for me, well its only 1 and I dont start usually drinking before 5 6 so today its friday and its going to be a big test. I was supposed to go for a pub night with my neighbourg but I have pulled out.

Last week, I have been out 3 nights in a row, and I have been drinking so much. I have 2 drinking/smoking buddies, I wonder how they are going to take the new "me"..They'll probably find me boring but I dont care.

Original poster
MoominMags · 23/07/2010 13:07

Hey gloup, glad it's going well. Seriously don't worry about what other people think about you not drinking. If they are funny about it it's their problem and definitely not yours. I have found that the people who react weirdly to it are the people that probably have their own issues/ problems with alcohol but are unable (or don't want) to face up to it.

OP posts:
algee · 23/07/2010 13:10

Gloup, I agree with moomin...and in fact, nobody really very much has reacted with anything other than support in my life (still plenty to go though). Have a feeling that maybe in fact I was rather boring in my dependance on booze...nobody has told me that either incidentally!

You ok today moomin?

venusandmars · 23/07/2010 13:14

Hi gloup, I agree with moomin. Before I was sober I used to hate it if my friends were not drinking, mainly because it showed me up and I had to acknowledge (to myself) the extent of my problem. On the other hand they may so busy getting pissed that they won't notice that you are sober. And you will probably be the one who finds their behaviour boring

Original poster
MoominMags · 23/07/2010 13:15

I am good thanks algee. Got a meeting tonight - it's very chilled, laid-back meeting. Normally me and about 10 blokes, sitting around chatting and eating cake! I love it, it's my home group. (Other women do come to it from time to time but quite often just me!)

Fantastic stuff getting to 2 weeks!!!

Was nodding my head when you were talking about picnics and people not drinking. I suppose though I could make any social event or occasion about booze! Cinema? Drinks after to 'talk about the film'. Lovely country walk? Best end up in a lovely country pub then - and so on!

How are you after DD's last day?

OP posts:
Original poster
MoominMags · 23/07/2010 13:16

Hello to venus too!

OP posts:
algee · 23/07/2010 13:33

social event, occasion or just Monday to Sunday night in front of the telly

's ok, inevitable niggle about whether we're doing the right thing, but I know we are really, just a big step. Really rather sad actually!

Original poster
MoominMags · 23/07/2010 13:45

I am sure that you have put lots of thought into it and it is the right choice.

Ha ha, re any night in front of the TV! So true!

What have you got planned for the weekend then? (I have meetings Fri and Sat, after the meeting tonight I am going to a wedding night do, Saturday is flat-blitzing time and time left over is for reading and not moving much! God, I am so exciting! But I will be sober and that's what matters.)

OP posts:
algee · 23/07/2010 14:20

a sober 50th birthday celebration in Brighton tomorrow, dh back off Sunday so I shall start packing... sober and hangover free!

Original poster
MoominMags · 23/07/2010 16:14

OK Babes, probably my last post until Monday although I may get a chance tomorrow... I hope that everyone has wonderful & sober weekends. Thanks to all of you for the support you all give to me - every day!

Already looking forward to catching up on Monday! (Makes it very easy to get up and get to work with this thread to look forward to...!)

OP posts:
jesuswhatnext · 23/07/2010 16:44

have a good weekend moomin.

algee · 23/07/2010 17:12

ah guess i've missed you moomin, have a good one, see you on monday!

venusandmars · 23/07/2010 21:41

I can't believe how much I am enjoying having a nice cup of tea on Friday night. I never thought I could be like this. I feel serene and happy (and sober).

Have a good weekend everyone.

jesuswhatnext · 23/07/2010 21:48

hi all, really quick one - am having a lovley evening with dh, just sitting, chatting, me sewing, him reading - like you venus, i feel serene, its marvelous!

dd getting ready to go 'oop north' camping with friends, i think they will have a great time, i would love to be a fly on the wall!

hope everyone else is having a lovley, sober start to the weekend!

gettingwrinkly · 23/07/2010 22:47

Hi all, Just thought I'd pop a quick post on to wish you all a great weekend. Got through another day without alcohol, wooohoo!! Waiting for DH to come home from seeing a local band, he'll have had 2 pints of shandy (he's very predictable ) and be quite happy with that. This must be the first Friday I've not had a drink for years and years, even before my drinking escalated I always used to drink at weekends, have had a vague longing for a drink rather than a desperate urge, so I guess that's good?
Hope you all have a great, sober weekend. x

venusandmars · 24/07/2010 09:22

Well done wrinkly. And isn't it nice to be waking up on a Saturday morning without that awful taste in your mouth.

Have a good weekend everyone.

jesuswhatnext · 24/07/2010 10:38

morning all - am really looking forward to today, dh is taking me out somewhere, he said 'just get in the car and wait and see'!

ooo lovely!!! where ever he takes me, waht ever we do

I SHALL NOT BE DRINKING!!

see you later beautiful babes - have a great day!

katerum · 24/07/2010 10:57

have a long list of things to do...gerbils, bedrooms, everywhere really, and want to continue decorating.
havent picked up a brush for two weeks and have all the paint etc. taking up the corner of the room.
aggghhh, cant be arsed, must be arsed.
hopefully report back later having done it all!
wish me luck, and good luck to you!

ooh, JWN, do let us know where you went!

idolikemondays · 24/07/2010 12:00

I'm just posting quickly, to say that I have been following this week, and haven't disappeared! Sounds like weekend has got off to a good beginning, hope you all continue to enjoy .

Things are back to normal here, only busier than usual from now during the days as all the schools have finished. Am going to concentrate totally on filling up time with the children so won't have time to brood. Hopefully that'll carry me through any dip in my mood in a couple of weeks time.

Have also booked a session with counsellor for those few days! Think my problem is more to do with unresolved anger - I actually don't have a temper as such, tend to think things through and avoid kneejerk reactions. So probably am not too sure what to do with the anger that hasn't gone from discussions and when I actually have shouted at my husband - mostly from a couple of years back around his poor behaviours (now resolved!).

Suspect that I've got drunk on those recent occasions to let out some anger, and need to find another way of doing that.

Meantime, am completely avoiding all alcohol, which is actually a step towards me being the "me" of a couple of years ago.

Have set myself a challenge of having to post here at least monthly to say that I haven't let myself down and have coped with each month. I will be around at other times - although I suspect that children will limit that until September .

Gloupgloup · 24/07/2010 13:03

Well I had 3 spritzer yesterday evening..I dont feel bad or good about it, today I wont drink.