Archers thread #186: Eavesdropping on a home for the terminally confused. Discuss The Archers here.

[Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g]

Thank you, @PseudoBadger, for kicking off this long, long series of Archers threads.

All views on The Archers welcome here! New blood welcomed, and of course we are always delighted to welcome back former or occasional listeners/posters. We don't all agree on all points, although we do mostly try to be civil about it. Most of us are posting tongue in cheek a lot of the time, so don't worry about revealing that you'd swipe right on Dane, the new Grey Gables manager, or other unusual views.

Spoilers: not on this thread, please! We don't wait for the omnibus to discuss the weeknight episodes, but we do try our best to avoid cross-contamination from https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/radioaddicts/4636789-the-archers-spoilers-thread-7-cant-wait-for-702pm-join-us-here, where spoilers are positively welcomed!

For newer listeners, lurkers or those who just have no idea what we're talking about, @DadDadDad has created this useful thread: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/radioaddicts/3557323-For-Archers-fans-a-guide-to-acronyms-on-the-long-running-discussion-threads-and-any-other-meta-thread-questions-you-may-have - BOOP point for him! (See thread for explanation.)

Thanks to @WitcheryDivine for the title inspiration. Over to you!

Yes! waves to lurking SW much better this week thank you!!

Helen omg. She's just too much! Feel sorry for her "bestie" Ian!! She gets very obsessed very quickly!

The village shop antics did have me laughing!

https://www.bakersandlarners.co.uk/?srsltid=AfmBOorxvX87_t-8Qqt7SPZnxm8OsbKhc92Va6GZDzmZvsMuJ4vcucH8

Barkers and Larners in Holt, Norfolk. A posh bit of everything.

Apart from Selfridges and Harrods, the poshest food shop I’ve been to is Partridges, formerly of Chelsea and now in Kensington.

My mum gave me a load of sewing supplies a few years ago (zios, buttons etc) all still in Caleys' bags. All in original packaging. We left there in 1975 and had moved several timed before dad retired. I loved that shop.

I find all these posts on lost department stores so sad. We had a magical one in my home city and all these years later I still feel sad about it. They were such wonderful places to visit as a child and even better as an adult.

And my goodness what I would do for a really good food hall in our local town.

Those department stores were brilliant. But belong to a very specific, possibly 80 year stretch?, bit of history.

My school uniform came from Caleys. My junior school at the time was just behind Oeascid street. We could see the castle from the playground!

Helen was exactly the same over the Aussie guy (Leon?) who then impregnated Annette, iirc. And then, of course, Rob. Never, ever, learns.

(Derailing, but the talk of the vanished department stores is so fascinating. They’re a whole topic in themselves and have an amazing history. Almost all the London ones were set up in the 19thc by drapers - almost invariably Welsh, West Country or Northern; think DH Evans, Dickins & Jones, Derry & Toms, John Lewis, William Whiteley etc. So sad that those great temples of commerce are all gone forever now).

No, lots of the big ones, in London anyway, date back to the mid-19thc - there’s a really great book about John Lewis (the family and the stores) by Victoria Glendinning called 'Family Business'. Well worth a read if you’re interested.

Apologies for my spelling last night, I think in retrospect I was actually asleep writing it. Circular firing squad was the phrase I was looking for re the shop meeting. Nicely done by Liz John who’s the writer this week.

I couldn't remember quite when they started - I read a lot about them for part of my degree.

But I think we can agree they're just about dead? Which is why I always try to buy something in Atkinsons when I'm in Sheffield.

Helen was unbelievable. Ian (who I can't stand) should have told her to STFU.

Tbh not hating Dane - his attitude to the whole Helen thing is amusing.

I'm loving all the department store nostalgia - I think that's one of the reasons I'm so attached to Underwoods, it harks back to another era which I'm rather sad to to think has now probably all but disappeared. My grandfather was the manager of such a store in the north of England - long since closed - and I still have a silver cake stand that was saved from the restaurant and a couple of little silver salt and pepper cruets that used to sit on the tables. It sounds silly to say it, but one of the reasons I love living in Paris is that it still retains the old fashioned shopping possibilities of my childhood memories growing up in the UK - the butcher, the baker, the greengrocer (among others) in my neighbourhood and the grand department stores with their restaurants and food halls. It's lovely to think that in the imaginary world of Borsetshire these things still exist and we all imagine them in a slightly different way based on our own experiences. I'm always slightly disappointed when I get back to the UK to discover everywhere isn't in fact like that. I still can't quite picture the charging station - is it like a service station, but without petrol pumps? It's making me think Ambridge Organics has missed a trick by not having a small outlet there - or maybe the farm shop and cafe just needed a couple of charging points in their car park instead.

There’s a little department store called Selbys on Holloway Road. It seems a bit out of place but can be handy to nip into

The Co-op department store in my town closed several years ago and was eventually converted into units with a Premier Inn above. Debenhams (in a retail park) closed then M&S in town closed and moved over to the Debenhams building. It has no cafe 😕. The town centre is a ghost town.

We recently stopped at Teal's in, I think, Wiltshire, on the way to the West Country. It mainly markets itself as a farm shop/restaurant, but has a number of charging points so I wondered if it's some sort of model for the Borsetshire version.

Helen behaving like a 13 year old on her first date is somehow simultaneously annoying and entertaining.

Also, going back earlier this year, I may have missed a few episodes, but did the Gills ever ask why they had a new robot vacuum cleaner and why Lillian was seen on the CCTV falling around in their foliage?

Didn't Tony repair the existing vacuum cleaner? Maybe Mick deleted the recording?

While we are still on the delightful detour of department stores (and Rossiters in Bath is worth a ramble for gifts and cookware), can somebody recommend some stores worth exploring around Newcastle, Leeds and Northumberland? With the dry weather we’ve had recently I quite expect torrential rain while we’re in our remote holiday lets next month (so quite expect to have to jump on a train and head up/down to a nearby city for a dose of museums and shopping and foodie treats).

Back to the Archers, Dane now reminds me a little of Vince in his early days. I am prepared to overlook his arrival scenes. In contrast Helen and Ian both seem deranged!

They are making such a thing of Harrisons party that presumably he will be involved in a tragic incident in the interim?

I wasn't expecting Harrison's party to actually feature as I thought the actor had left so I'm thinking it will happen off-stage on a Saturday and we'll just hear reports of it or it will be cancelled altogether.

Not to channel @RegimentalSturgeon but I feel that’s too much to hope for. Much more likely he’s been pouring out his troubles to the nearest fecund looking colleague and tripped over and landed in her vagina. Or at least plans to.

What 9n earth is Ian doing getting so involved in Helen and Dane. It sounded like a y9 relationship, not grown ups over 40.

Good grief Helen. Calm down.

Was it Bentall’s in Kingston? We had Lewis’s in Manchester, not to be confused with John Lewis.

@Madcats I was going to suggest a visit to Otterburn Mill but I fear it is closed.

Rothbury is a nice gentle spot.

This is owned by Morley's who are taking over Jolly's in Bath. Is it any good?

It has a good underwear department!!

it’s small so hard to judge but it is like a mini house of Fraser (old style when it was good)

We had Lewis's in Leeds as well, opposite Schofield's. Not quite as upmarket, but it semeed very popular and had a good range of stuff.

I dimly remember the department store in Holloway from when we lived in Tufnell Park, over 40 years ago. Amazed to discover it's still there!

Agree with everyone else who's enjoyed this week so far. Much, much better.

I enjoyed the shop bickering.

The Great Dane is improving. Helen and Ian are both bonkers.

Same here. Our shopping experiences are so dull now. And online shopping is a soulless experience.