Archers thread #175: Crime, punishment and kittens. Discuss The Archers here.

[Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g]

Thank you, @PseudoBadger, for kicking off this long, long series of Archers threads.

All views on The Archers welcome here! New blood welcomed, and of course we are always delighted to welcome back former or occasional listeners/posters. We don't all agree on all points, although we do mostly try to be civil about it. Most of us are posting tongue in cheek a lot of the time, so don't worry about revealing that your current highlight is the kitten naming, or other unusual views.

Spoilers: not on this thread, please! We don't wait for the omnibus to discuss the weeknight episodes, but we do try our best to avoid cross-contamination from https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/radio_addicts/4636789-the-archers-spoilers-thread-7-cant-wait-for-702pm-join-us-here, where spoilers are positively welcomed!

For newer listeners, lurkers or those who just have no idea what we're talking about, @DadDadDad has created this useful thread: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/radio_addicts/3557323-For-Archers-fans-a-guide-to-acronyms-on-the-long-running-discussion-threads-and-any-other-meta-thread-questions-you-may-have - BOOP point for him! (See thread for explanation.)

As I am posting this on Sunday morning at a point where some omnibus listeners won't have caught up with this week's events, I've kept the title less spoilerish than I might have done. Below this point, everything broadcast to date is of course fair game, so be warned!

Of course the main interest for most us at the moment is indeed the kitten naming competition. Isn't it? No?

Oh well, since you insist ...

How do we think George is going to cope now? Whither the Grundy and Horrobin clan? Will Lilian choke on her G&T (please)? Will Kenton get septicaemia from a kitten scratch? Will Alice die of sanctimoniousness? Will Fallon spend the rest of her life with the appalling Harrison and his unfulfulled longing for a behbeh? Will Adam and Will come to blows in the Bridge Farm packing shed?

Over to you!

I continue to hope that Burns is going to be kicked out off the force. That should squash Fallon’s daft caff nicely.

Yep - after the financial commitment has been made preferably. And after tash has decided to turn the tea room into a spa

It's very Natasha not to realise that maybe Fallon didn't really like having her lease and business whipped away from underneath her.

Mind you, I'm really sceptical about the prospects for success of a veggie café in a charging station. The reality is someone like Smith's would set up in one of the other units and stock lots of sandwiches, sausage rolls, pork pies, crisps etc, shove in a coffee machine and nick all Fallon's business. But maybe Fallon will be forced by sheer economic pressure to go down that route also.

Natasha is so arrogant. She can't see how her constant micro managing has made this decision even easier for Fallon. I loved how Helen tried to point this but it just fell on deaf ears. Ideally the tearoom will become deserted while Fallon's new venture booms. That would be very satisfying. However I suspect the SW will want the tearoom to remain, providing never ending possibilities for random villagers to bump into each other and have awkward, disjointed conversations for plot device purposes.

Didn't Adam work with goats in Namibia or wherever he was before he returned to Ambridge?* Will he become Head Goat Wrangler with Henwee as his apprentice?
*I may have imagined this, of course. I'm sure @AskingQuestionsAllTheTime will know.

there's been a lot of questioning if a Vegan café would do well at a charging station, but it is not beyond the bounds of possibility that plenty of people driving an EV are vegetarian anyway, if they are tree-huggers enough to drive an EV. Which are generally new-ish still, so the owners also have the money to afford one.

I really really really wanted Fallon to tell Natasha to take her job and stick it and her micromanagement where the sun doesn't shine. And Helen wittering on about "keeping the customers we have" knowing that a lot of their customer base was built up by Fallon in the first place.

I really really want the Bridge Farm Archers to have a massive disaster. They are all so self-absorbed and smug.

To answer @Brefugee's question about EV owners and veganism, I heard on the radio recently that the majority of EV owners are not eco warriors but early adopters. So they are no more likely to be vegans than the rest of the population. Lots of EV drivers will also be delivery drivers, etc who have not chosen their vehicle themselves and, again, have no reason to be vegans.

Then there is the suggestion that Fallon will do outside catering as she does at the Terum. I can't see any reason why the majority of people who want to use a catering service would be queuing up for vegan food at their wakes and weddings.

One thing I don't know though is whether vegan food will be more or less expensive to buy. I would imagine that using acquafaba, etc is cheaper than using eggs, butter and cream, but on the rare occasions I have encountered a vegan croissant in the wild, it has been the same price as an all butter one.

I suppose there could be a market for frozen home made vegan takeaways for people who want to eat more vegan food but don't have the time or knowledge to cook it at home.

I still think an all vegan shop/cafe at the charging station is a crazy idea though. As we have said in the past, why would Fallon deliberately cater solely for a niche market, rather than selling a wide range of food which includes some vegan options? And do we know if she will be the only food outlet there? Unless the charging station customers have no choice, I imagine a large proportion would opt for more familiar crisps, sandwiches, pasties and cakes.

I don't know if Fallon will have a licence to sell vegan wine, but I have always wondered who first thought, "I think this wine would be greatly improved by the addition of a sprinkle of dried fish swim bladders."

Could have been an accident. "Damn, I dropped the fish guts into the wine vat as I was clearing the table... ah, if we sieve them out, who will know?"

Apparently Mediterranean fisherman used to store their wine in fish swim bladders, and found that their cloudy wine became lovely and clear (and no doubt a bit fishy?).

Someone must also have found dropping egg white into wine has the same effect.

Goat meat does taste good, very much like lamb.

I have never heard a male boat called a buck though. Ours were all billies.

Nor me.

Then there is the suggestion that Fallon will do outside catering as she does at the Terum. I can't see any reason why the majority of people who want to use a catering service would be queuing up for vegan food at their wakes and weddings. There's no reason that her outside catering would have to be exclusively vegan though. Presumably she would just offer options - as any catering services would. I'm wondering if in fact she will end up offering non-vegan options as well at the cafe. I think a lot of customers might follow Fallon - unless the Terum can find a star baker to fill her shoes (Adam's matcha latte's or whatever aren't going to be enough to draw the crowds). The charging station will presumably have parking and if she creates as lovely a vibe there as she did with the old tea room, a lot of customers might follow her. Most people go to Bridge Farm in their cars - they could just as easily drive to the charging station. Natasha herself has no talent whatsoever in that direction (or instinct for what people might want) she has just piggy-backed on Fallon's success.

I remember seeing a herd of goats with a couple of little dogs with them on their own in Namibia. They put the puppies in with the goats so they think they’re family and then let them go off grazing. Dogs protect the goats and then herd them home at them end of the day. Dogs are great.

I suppose it depends if you feel like you’re in a motorway service station or not. It’s going to be a big outlay for her to fit the unit out

it’s an interesting one because as charging gets faster then people are going to stay for shorter and shorter periods so she needs to balance convenience with perhaps trying to attract locals

I would far rather support Fallon’s new venture than go to the Terum and be served by Adam (too weird) or Chelsea (too erratic) but the problem is the oat milk and vegan dimension. Cakes, croissants and scones made without butter leave me cold so I would probably support Fallon for a bit and then sadly start drifting back to BF. There’s only so far a nice vibe and friendly owner can take me- ultimately the products they sell have to be what I want to buy.

I think if there were a Venn diagram of the vegans I know and the electric car owners I know, there would be a very minute overlap indeed.

And im not drinking tea with oat milk in for a gold clock.

I’m vegetarian so I’m not opposed to meat free but I think dairy free is a step too far for the location

I'm sure one of the other shops will have a Costa coffee machine and I think a lot of people would rather have a milky machine coffee than a nut milk drink freshly made

do we know how big the charging station is though? I assume it will have a smiths at a minimum. Maybe a franchisee for McDonald’s!!

ultimately it is in the charging stations interests to fill the unit with businesses that people recognise because when you are driving along you stop where you know. At least we do - it’s the one time the kids get Burger King!!

Charging can be very quick. My son regularly drives from the west country to London in his EV and does a quick top up charge at a service station on the way home. He says it is so quick that he doesn't actually have time to queue up, order and drink a cup of coffee.

I expect I'll get criticised for this, but I also picture most vegans as sensible, hair shirt type people. While I would welcome the opportunity to pick up a decadent pastry, dripping with butter, cream and chocolate, en route, I imagine the vegans will have dutifully packed their own home made snacks for the journey and wouldn't be tempted by Fallon's offerings. Are they really going to be queueing up for Fallon's frivolous Halloween cakes with green glitter and sparkles?

(Actually, thinking about it, they'd probably have to pass on the glitter and sparkles as they are likely to be made with shellac, which as we all know is made of the crushed bodies of tiny insects.)

That would be true with a normal filling station but maybe people with electric cars like something different. I have no idea really, I don't have an electric car but would prefer Fallon's offerings over pork pies any day.

Of course she should have wider options including but not exclusively vegan though.

Brian Hewlett who plays Neil was born in 1939 according to IMDB which would make him 85.

Fallon seems nice and I'd probably want to support her but wouldn't want most vegan things (a lot of the fats taste nasty and are very unhealthy). I suppose some onion bhajis might be nice, but better with yoghurt. Maybe if Harrison gets sacked he'll talk sense to her, there's a first time for many things. Gluten-free and vegan options Fallon, but not just one choice for everyone.

Am I the only person who would not eat a green cake that glittered? It sounds like the spore-releasing stage of a nasty decay organism. And did Natasha say cobwebs?

Cake decorating cobwebs. You can make them yourself out of sugar or buy ready-made.

I dunno, the local vegan places in my city do a big business in vegan junkfood. Lots of giant burgers, seitan kebab fries, fancy doughnuts. Vegans nowadays aren't all moderate wholefood eaters.

Whether it works commercially, it's a neat plot idea— it gets at a core conflict in the countryside: you've got young wealthy people who are more likely to be into plant food and the farmer types who see veganism as a threat to their way of life.