Archers thread #163: Too much aggro, not enough agri! Discuss The Archers here.

[Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g]

Thank you, @PseudoBadger, for kicking off this long, long series of Archers threads.

All views on The Archers welcome here! New blood welcomed, and of course we are always delighted to welcome back former or occasional listeners/posters. We don't all agree on all points, although we do mostly try to be civil about it. Most of us are posting tongue in cheek a lot of the time, so don't worry about revealing that, or other unusual views.

Spoilers: not on this thread, please! We don't wait for the omnibus to discuss the weeknight episodes, but we do try our best to avoid cross-contamination from www.mumsnet.com/talk/radio_addicts/4636789-the-archers-spoilers-thread-7-cant-wait-for-702pm-join-us-here, where spoilers are positively welcomed!

For newer listeners, lurkers or those who just have no idea what we're talking about, @DadDadDad has created this useful thread: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/radio_addicts/3557323-For-Archers-fans-a-guide-to-acronyms-on-the-long-running-discussion-threads-and-any-other-meta-thread-questions-you-may-have - BOOP point for him! (See thread for explanation.)

Thanks to @LikeTalkingToLassie for the thread title idea! She and @LillianGish had fun with this theme on the last thread:

More farmer, less drama
More ploughing, less rowing
There's mileage in silage.
More sheds, fewer beds.

All good points. Fair to say nobody on the last thread was delighted to see the return of Harry. I think we all agree that Alice is a blithering idiot to get involved with him again. Most of us also think that Miranda is up to no good. Other storylines in play at the moment:

Alistair and Denise, with the massive complication of John and Paul
Ed and Emma - another doomed Grundy enterprise? Does Will still have the will to wang them some wonga?
Whither George - YouTube sensation or Borchester Magistrates' Court?
Will Markie cause mayhem at The Bull?
Will Harrison haul him in to Borchester nick?
Will Hannah get off with Chris?
Will we ever get used to the new Robert?
Will there ever be a new Roy?
Why do we hear so little from Brookfield now? (Although if we never heard Pip again, I for one would be delighted)
Will Stella dump Pip?

There are probably others I've missed. Over to you!

Agree. But I didn’t like Laura! She reminded me of the mayor

Laura was assertive. The mayor was bonkers.

It was the voice rather than the manner.

i assume she’s been brought in to create a love triangle/square. Feels a bit yawnsome

I wondered if this was why she was so upset after sleeping with him. It was an incident where she knew she shouldn’t do it, knew she should retain some self control and do “the right thing” but gave into her wishes even though it was a bad idea. I thought perhaps afterwards the remorse she felt was linked to her knowledge that it’s a slippery slope of losing control.

assume she’s been brought in to create a love triangle/square. Feels a bit yawnsome I agree. I’m find the whole will they/won’t they too tedious. I’d be happy for Alistair and Denise to get together, but the agonising over D’s husband leaves me cold. We don’t know him so I don’t care about him - I suppose we should care about how it might affect Paul, but he’s so relentlessly cheery it’s dramatically dull.

Maybe it will be the SL about the clown who is depressed under the mask

could be quite harrowing

Map indicates it is about 1200 yards. About twice as far as Henry walks home from the school bus every day – I assume Helen allows him to do that unescorted!

When Paul was worrying about his gran he quite forgot the mannerisms and sounded a much less gruelling person to have around.

Denise is so cold and indifferent towards Ali-stare yet he continues to hang on in there, waiting for her to leave her husband. He sounds like a desperate lapdog when he is around her and she just treats him with open contempt. It’s baffling. Hopefully Laura turns out to be nice. However I have a horrible feeling she has been brought in as a plot device to jolt Denise into realising he is “the one”. It’s barely credible really as they do not sound well suited at all.

The inevitable histrionics from Paul if they do get together will be unbearable.

Thanks, @Asking. So about a ten-minute walk. Pathetic!

Ominous CA... oh, Alice

Nope, not buying any of this week's story line.

So she already had the wine (sounded like wine) hidden at home. It wasn't a spur of the moment slip then.

I haven’t been able to listen. Can anyone give me a precis?

Harry has gone to rehab.
Ed decides to be a bonsai tree surgeon instead.
Alice doesn't eat cheese on toast and soup for supper.

Ed talked to Fallon about his fears re the tree surgery business and got his worries off his chest.

Alice went to Harry's house and his Mum was there. He's gone to the rehab now.

Later Lillian talking to Alice telling her how wonderful she was then took her home and made her cheese on toast. Alice then took out her hidden stash of wine (back of the pan cupboard sound effects) and Alice poured herself a nice slurpy glass.

🤣 in a nut shell

Blimey

If Alice really did have a bottle (of what, vodka again?) stashed away somewhere that was massively premeditated.

Would somebody down Ed's way explain to him that there are probably hundreds of people/Airbnbing/Letting agencies in Felpersham who would pay good money for a couple of "gardeners" who would happily haircut all the mature shrubs and shred the trimmings. No climbing involved.

The rental properties round here, "garden by chainsaw/high-powered hedgeclippers", accompanied by a hefty shredder on a flatbed truck.

Exactly. She had to rummage around quite a bit - lots of banging and clattering.

I can't help feeling that if I were seriously trying to fight an alcohol addiction I wouldn't keep alcohol in the house. Can someone who knows about these things explain why she would if she is serious about it?

I also find myself wondering why having succeeded in getting Harry to some help seems to have pushed her over the edge.

For some, knowing that there is a bottle there alleviates the panic about not being able to drink and, weirdly, makes not drinking easier (ok, until it isn’t, but you asked ‘why?’). For others, it can be ’It proves I’ve cracked it: there’s a bottle under the stairs and I haven’t touched it. For umpty months, weeks, days, hours, blah, drone’.

(For yet others, the scripties put it there)
Bottoms up, Alice gel, I knew you’d have it in you!

As to @AskingQuestionsAllTheTime’s second question, not a clue. Probably realising how dull life was going to be without a source of drama and self-recrimination. But you’d have to ask the scripties

Thanks. I suppose it makes sense, in a sideways sort of way.

So with the caveat that I wouldn’t be without TA, and love to hate it at times, I have many, many moans:

1. Alice. WTAF. Unbearable to listen to her back and forth with the even more unbearable Harry - totally lacking in subtlety.
2. Harrison. So cheery chappy that it borders on sleazy. If the writers’ intention is to slap us around the face repeatedly with how great he is with kids, leading into an unplanned pregnancy story following all the recent, heavily-signalled and cringeworthy sex, then they’re doing a good job.
3. Helen. Always irritating even in small doses.
4. Ed ‘teasing’ Alistair about Laura - grow the fuck up and get your emotional intelligence antennae retuned. If i was Alistair, I’d have hit him around the head with a Texel.
5. Alistair and Denise - if the scriptwriters want us to invest in the storyline, they need to make us (a) care about both characters and (b) make the relationship vaguely credible rather than repeatedly highlighting the total lack of chemistry and apparently non-existent basis for any real relationship.
6. The suitcase mix-up. Really scraping the barrel. While I get the need for some humour, this was pantomime level. They might as well have just slapped us in the face with a fish.