Archers thread #160: Ram a lamb a ding dong! To rate the mass wisteria in Ambridge, tap the feedback tablet here.

[Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g]

Thank you, @PseudoBadger, for kicking off this long, long series of Archers threads.

All views on The Archers welcome here! New blood welcomed, and of course we are always delighted to welcome back former or occasional listeners/posters. We don't all agree on all points, although we do mostly try to be civil about it. Most of us are posting tongue in cheek a lot of the time, so don't worry about revealing that you'd have given a home to Hilda the Hellcat, or other unusual views.

Spoilers: not on this thread, please! We don't wait for the omnibus to discuss the weeknight episodes, but we do try our best to avoid cross-contamination from www.mumsnet.com/talk/radio_addicts/4636789-the-archers-spoilers-thread-7-cant-wait-for-702pm-join-us-here, where spoilers are positively welcomed!

For newer listeners, lurkers or those who just have no idea what we're talking about, @DadDadDad has created this useful thread: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/radio_addicts/3557323-For-Archers-fans-a-guide-to-acronyms-on-the-long-running-discussion-threads-and-any-other-meta-thread-questions-you-may-have - BOOP point for him! (See thread for explanation.)

Thanks to @MerryChristmasToYou, @OverArmour and @LillianGish for the thread title ideas.

This week is a bit better than last week, but the Brad/Adil/Lily stuff is very odd. Coming up to the anniversary of Jennifer's death (22nd January last year). We need a new matriarch - could that be Natasha? I find her quite an interesting character. Sometimes she's awful and then she has moments as last night where she utterly redeems herself.

Over to you!

No, I think it is a 'I have absolutely no idea what is going on story line' and it seems to be an essential qualification for most of the writers.

It is just absolute rubbish and I wonder just how long it will carry on before:

(a) it improves and returns to a really good programme (I live in hope)

or

(b) it stays as it is and gradually reduces from 6 episodes to 5. then 4 etc etc

@RowanMayfair yes on second thoughts you are correct.

It is completely hilarious how they make out the band had such a following. Of course there are some great local bands that get a good following. I know some. It's just that it's not that believable in this case somehow.

I don't the Boss Black Hat had recognised her, and I don't think anyone asked about her; Kenton chose to talk about her in her absence. "My wife Jolene was going to read out the result of a competition which would be of no interest to you at all." It was very Kenton.

Is this story eventually going to turn into Kenton asking Jolene why, if she recognised them in the pub, she didn’t say something straightaway (I still don’t understand why she didn’t - she and Kenton had a conversation in the cellar after she first spotted the men) and why she has not mentioned this fact to the police. I think if she had alerted him straightaway he would have been much less inclined to venture out into the car park and would have waited for the police to arrive. Is it a rather clumsy and over-elaborate way of driving a wedge between them? Either way I definitely think the phrase dog’s dinner (with regard to plotting) should appear in the next thread title.

I think:

1. Thug was throwing his intimidatory weight around when Jolene was singing in Wolverhampton and decided to approach her on stage “because he fancied her” but generally because he has that classic intimidating misogynistic attitude some men have when a women catches their attention.
2. He got stopped by the bouncer. Didn’t like it. Fight ensued plus revenge by burning down the pub. Classic thuggery.

then perhaps
3)coincidentally year later thugs go to The Bull. Jolene recognises him. Feels panicky, not entirely thinking rationally, decides to avoid being seen by Thug so as not to draw attention to herself and risk repeat of last time. She hopes by doing so that they leave the pub eventually with no need for trouble and never to be seen again.
4) coincidentally Kenton pisses them off by ssssshing them rudely and also mentions his wife’s distinctive name several times. Thug also catches sight of Jolene. Remembers.
5) not sure why they return to pub car park. Either for revenge on Kenton for being rude/married to Jolene. Or because they had something criminal to do and Thug figured he could manipulate Jolene into being quiet about it but it went wrong last minute when Kenton disturbed and hit attacked by rogue beast.

Althiugh I’m not sure how the car alarm fits in with 3)4)5) as it suggests they were around earlier than the day the first entered the pub.

I didn’t realise Jolene had made it so big

I fear the SWs have chosen to forget that we’ve heard Jolene sing, and thus they’re thinking they can continue to fool us that she had any kind of plausible career as a vocalist.

They are wrong.

The car alarm had been going off randomly before the thugs ever appeared, I think; didn't it happen while Tracy was washing the car?

The car has a poltergeist. This explanation makes as much sense as most of the rest we're trying for size.

<note taken of excellent dog's dinner suggestion from Lillian>

Either way I definitely think the phrase dog’s dinner (with regard to plotting) should appear in the next thread title. No. Just no. Too close to what Kenton almost became.

Yes, it went off - I think - once before Tracy washed the car, then again during that scene. It must be relevant for it to have been featured in the run up to the attack.

Or else it isn't, unfortunately. There are figurative guns which have been on Ambridge walls for years without ever being mentioned again, thus making a mockery of Chekov's dictum.

<note amended to take account of Mere's objection>

Perhaps Kenton and Jolene are going to be written out by sending them into witness protection after Jolene eventually confesses all to Harrison and thus helps to bring down their criminal empire.

I withdraw my previous pirate storyline as it is, at this stage, far too believable and coherent for The Archers.

Re witness protection, maybe this is where we finally find out Joy's back story.

I would say, based on this storyline that The Archers is going to the dogs.

It's alarming how it has gone to the dogs like this. It feels like we're listening to a pirate version.

Niiiiiiiiiiiiiice …..

and before they go Joy says "it's not as bad as you think it's going to be"

So, dear listeners: did any of Kate's clothes turn up at the fashion show?

I'd forgotten all about those in all the excitement. No, I think is the answer.

This is honestly the first time I’ve considered stopping listening. What a stupid storyline. As someone said unthread, if they wanted to do a dog attack, as it is tooical, then that could have easily been written as a storyline without all the mafia style storyline.

Not the first time I've considered stopping listening, but I seem to have lost interest.

Unless there is some link e.g. to Joy's presence in Ambridge, I don't seem to care any more.

Is Ambridge in the east end of Borsetshire, or is Brookfield now called Brookside?

Yes, I got to the end of Friday's episode, thought "Well, that me done with TA," and turned off the radio with an air of finality.

But I expect I'll not be able to help but listen to tonight's episode I shall have to revert to the post-modern cultural critic mode I've had to adopt during past Archers listening crises

I don't think I could ever stop listening, it's ingrained too deeply. I'm less attentive though.

Somebody’s got to keep listening, else who’s going to update these threads?