Archers thread #157: How sharper than a serpent’s tooth it is to have a thankless clan! Discuss The Grundys here. Bicker about The Archers as well if you like.

[Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g]

Thank you, @PseudoBadger, for kicking off this long, long series of Archers threads.

All views on The Archers welcome here! New blood welcomed, and of course we are always delighted to welcome back former or occasional listeners/posters. We don't all agree on all points, although we do mostly try to be civil about it. Most of us are posting tongue in cheek a lot of the time, so don't worry about revealing that, or other unusual views.

Spoilers: not on this thread, please! We don't wait for the omnibus to discuss the weeknight episodes, but we do try our best to avoid cross-contamination from www.mumsnet.com/talk/radio_addicts/4636789-the-archers-spoilers-thread-7-cant-wait-for-702pm-join-us-here, where spoilers are positively welcomed!

For newer listeners, lurkers or those who just have no idea what we're talking about, @DadDadDad has created this useful thread: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/radio_addicts/3557323-For-Archers-fans-a-guide-to-acronyms-on-the-long-running-discussion-threads-and-any-other-meta-thread-questions-you-may-have - BOOP point for him! (See thread for explanation.)

Thanks to @OverArmour for the idea of making it clear in the title many of us are inveterate bickerers!

Now over to you, as we are about to eat and I won't hear tonight's offering till later ....

WoollyBat
I’m too scared to go in because I won’t know the answers to questions about what kind of artisanal coffee I want.

I have found that I am now old enough to be able to Look at the creature behind the counter and say "I want an ordinary cup of coffee, not too strong, and some cold milk. And I don't really care what you call it."

@Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g

The 🔮says that Tom is cultivating a man bun.

You reckon he thinks it will drawn attention away from his receding hairline?

As per the username, then

@AskingQuestionsAllTheTime
Indubitably!

@Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g that is brilliant. Was it called Terrum, perchance?

I'm still nervous as to what other flavour combinations Tom has in mind. Does anyone else remember Mrs Cropley from The Vicar of Dibley...

Tom, of course, knows all about recipes, having made a runaway success of the sausage-based ready meals with Brenda. Well, it was Old Tom, but still. You remember: they had an idea, tried it out once and then cooked up huge batches which went down a storm with the multitudes who bought them.
Totally plausible.
So no wonder he's fizzing with ideas for hipster pastries.😀

Thanks! No, their pretensions were limited to the coffee.

New thread needed soon! Any title thoughts? I'm Up North again for a few days but this should not be an issue unless I freeze to death before this thread fills up. I've spent too long in the Soft South.

I started out thinking that, if Tom starts running his ideas past Natasha, he might actually have a chance of making it work with Fallon. But then I wondered what on earth is the dynamic between him and Natasha? Did he really come up with bollocks like Te Rum and cauliflower eclairs without mentioning it to Natasha? And if so, did she agree with him and then change her mind, or is it a case of letting him drone on in the background saying "Mmm" occasionally without realising what she might appear to be agreeing to?

And how can Tom be so dense? Surely it doesn't take Einstein to work out that cauliflower eclairs are never going to be a smash hit with the public, or that it's unbelievably crass making the tenant you have forced out smile for a publicity shot handing over the keys? And that if they call the café Te Rum people are going to call it Treum or Terror, and will assume they're selling rum?

I steer well clear of places like that in case I'm sneered at for choosing beans grown on the wrong side of a Fijian mountain and I just knowI'll chafe at getting a bill for £5.75 a pop.

I have found that I am now old enough to be able to Look at the creature behind the counter and say "I want an ordinary cup of coffee, not too strong, and some cold milk. And I don't really care what you call it.

I do frequent my local Nero (as it's the nearest and has lots of work spaces) and there poor Mr Barista is obliged to ask us all if we want this week's special tra-la-la Fijian mountainside blend etc for an extra 30p or whatever it is. But he has a brilliant perfunctory way of doing it as if to say "don't worry, I know you don't". Now that's service.

And several piercings?

Multiple tattoos, including at least one full sleeve.

When I looked at Google translate, it gave me Te Rum as the Swedish for Tea Room, so I suspect that is where Tom (or the SW) got it from. But I also strongly suspect that Tom's pronunciation bears little or no relationship to the way Swedes would say it.

And how can Tom be so dense?

But he has a VISION. He's pushing the envelope, thinking outside the box emulating Heston Blumenthal, and hoping to unleash snail porridge on Ambridge. He's being MODERN

@Passepartoute , I think it's likely to be nearer Tay Room (short oo like in good). Jakub would probably point out the correct pronunciation and that te rum isn't the term used

I don't know if the term is used but I can remember an eatery that had a translated name on the signage, and the error in translation was glaring.
Something along the lines of 'Tom's Dinner' instead of Tom's Diner'

I’m surprised he hasn’t suggested they start serving meatballs and a smorgasbord

I don't speak Swedish, so my hunch might be wrong on this, but I've checked in a couple of dictionaries and my feeling is that Tom's Te Rum is just a literal translation of the words 'Tea' and 'Room' which makes no sense as a phrase in Swedish because they don't call a place where you sit to have a hot drink and a bun a 'tea room', not to mention all the other cultural associations of the term 'tea room' which just don't translate. It just doesn't make sense in Swedish and is typical of someone who doesn't have clue of how languages work and thinks you can just do it at word at a time.

It would be like a French speaker trying to translate 'cauliflower éclair' from French into English one word at a time. The result would be 'lightning bolt to the cabbage flower'.

The whole thing is more bizarre because what Tom wants is to get away from the idea of a tea room (connotations of being a bit chintzy, dated décor, older clientele, conservative and basic menu) but thinks he can do that by badly translating tea room into the language of a country that doesn't have tea rooms. 🤔

The WordReference dictionary, amusingly, suggests that the primary translation of 'tea room' into Swedish is 'café'.

Something along the lines of 'Tom's Dinner' instead of Tom's Diner'
it was more like Diner Tom's.

My thoughts too,@Fink
Jakob would be quite blunt about it

Where is Jakob from?

natasha definitely knew about the name because he asked why she didn’t like it anymore when she had agreed it

IIRC British-born to Swedish parents.

Interesting. I thought he was foreign born north European from the way he speaks!

Oops, "Jakob was born in Stockholm to a Swedish father and English mother, before moving to London as a child. "

The actor who plays Jakob, Paul Venables, appears to have been brought up in Devon, so if he's managing to sound like someone who grew up bilingual in Swedish and English it's pure acting. He looks nothing like my mental picture of Jakob, but oddly he does look a bit similar to Steven Hartley, who played his brother Erik.

I'd like to suggest ^Ter Rumty tumpty tumpty tum Ter Rumpty tumpty tum tum^ (or some variation thereof) for the new thread title.

Are you thinking of Barwick Green, Lillian?