The Archers #96: Is that a rat I smell or the whiff of Snell? In Chaucer’s famous Tale of Two Torsos, Brian’s ‘still got it’ and Poldark is searching for scything opportunities in Susan’s kitchen.

[NotdeadyetBOING]

Welcome..... I'd concocted a longer title with all sorts of references to bitch stitching and pasta bakes, but was thwarted by the pesky character limit

I hope not. I don’t think humiliation adds anything to the story.

I don’t believe home farm will be sold.

However if it is I’d like it to be a really interesting new family.

Oh for goodness' sake ... if they're going to bond over a shared love of the Da Vinci Code then they deserve one another! If SW want to portray someone as ignorant about France but otherwise a decent person, there are so many better references than that tripe.

'Most of what I know about France comes from the Asterix books, and I read those a while ago.'

There, fixed it.

He did say it in a self-depreciating tone! Maybe he hasn’t read Asterix. I never have. I did read the Da Vinci Code once on an overnight flight. I must remember very little about it as I was surprised when Lee mentioned it as a link to France!

Justin is buying home farm surely?

But then Helen also picked it as her holiday reading. Presumably to show her high opinion of Lee's taste.

My point was that the SWs could have made him have read almost anything, it didn't have to be the Da Vinci Code. It's as likely that he's read Asterix as that. Or something like Chocolat (Ok, maybe a but feminine) or A Tale of Two Cities (possibly too highbrow). To be honest, I'd have thought better of him if he'd admitted that all he knows about France was from watching Dogtanian as a child or watching Ratatouille with his kids.

Statistically it's more likely he's read the Da Vinci Code and also more likely there's an old copy lying around that Helen's picked up.

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_best-selling_books

Have you read it? I don't generally read books like that, but I surprised my inner literary snob and remember it being an entertaining page-turner.

I also haven't read A Tale of Two Cities or Chocolat and had forgotten Dogtanian was French! Not seen Ratatouille either.

Given their age it's likely they both did French at school. I remember being fascinated to learn that French children not only drank chocolate when they came from school but that they drank from bowls! Thanks to the Tricolore textbook for that one.

I can't see Justin forcing JD to leave Home Farm at such short notice, not least because Lill would make his life hell if it was him.

That ridiculous breakfast scene annoyed me.

You would think that at least one of them would have known that there are other ways to make toast.

Surely there's a grill somewhere in that kitchen. Or even a small Aga.

Most of what I know about France comes from the Asterix books, and I read those a while ago

Most of what I know about Vercingetorix comes from Asterix. Vercingetorix was the answer to a pub quiz question set by Jim, which Jazzer struggled with, ages back. I remember this because I knew the answer because of Asterix.

Oh Baxter I must be so tired. (Littlest inkling is teething.) I make toast on the grill every single day and this never occurred to me.

Hannah doesn't care really she's just looking for trouble with Natasha.

TheEfficientBaxter that was what I was shouting at the radio too.

Somehow I managed to eat toast for breakfast during my entire childhood and we never possessed one of them there new-fangled toasters. Actually I still don't, and I too just make toast using the grill setting on my oven.

Brilliant R4

Hannah doesn't care really she's just looking for trouble

Just about sums up Hannah. She is entirely unpleasant with no redeeming characteristics - very two dimensional character.

Brilliant crossword clue R4, I meant to say!

Does anyone "watch" TA in the evening? I do and they made a large mistake in their precis; calling Nat. Helen. No one in the studio\office noticed when it was put on't telly?

But Hannah does have a point, Natashas dietary choices do seem to be a bit odd for a "healthy food" person - and turning Tom into a bit of a hypocrite. (But you can make porridge from oats in the microwave in the same time...)

Oh and I still find Lee a bit suspicious - I increasingly think he could be in contact with Rob.

I wonder if Henry is going to say anything about Lee squeezing Mummy in the car park

Anyone else think Natasha's ex isn't so much an ex. All that 'Tom can't go to her house because she has an awkward housemate' stuff!

If Lee is a wrongun I'll scream.

I think Natasha food choices are symbolic (to go with the other food symbolism previously discussed). She purports to be all about fresh fruit and juicing, but it's all an act since her cupboard is stuffed full of convenience foods. She is not to be trusted - what you see is definitely not what you get. What do we know about the "Alex" she lives with? Is he more than a flatmate? Is that why she needed to go back and the reason why she wasn't too shocked by Tom's FWB revelation? Also is just me or does Natasha sound like Uncle Bryn from Gavin and Stacey : "I'm having porridge today," to announce his breakfast and "I've got to hit the road I'm driving up to Market Harborough" are exactly the sort of announcements he would make (it's not just the Welsh accent, though obviously it is partly that).

I wish Nessa would move to Ambridge.

She purports to be all about fresh fruit and juicing, but it's all an act since her cupboard is stuffed full of convenience foods. She is not to be trusted - what you see is definitely not what you get

Ooh deep thinking (not being sarcastic) It would explain why we had that bizarre breakfast scene (although not convinced the Archers' SWs do deep thinking)

Natasha and Hannah are both pretty unlikeable. Johnny must be thinking of them and Tom "these people are almost twice my age and they are all behaving like spoilt, egotistical children" (except he's probably too nice to think that)

I was thinking that about Natasha's housemate. I'm surprised Tom doesn't question more why he can't go to her house. I keep hearing Bryn's voice now. There was some superb acting in Gavin and Stacey. I hear something new every time I watch it.

So now we know that Lee is a physio. He could fix Neil’s back.
Rob is so going to turn up at Christmas.