Helen is drowning in the Cow Pat of Destiny. Please SWs - when will it be curtains for Rob?

[PseudoBadger]

Come on Kirsty!

Keri just liked one of my tweets! Has a little sit down.

This must be how the youth feel if Kanye likes them on instagram

tibba - he said something about Henwee increasing his vocabulary

Ooo will he start swearing. He's been reading this thread.
Tell us what Keri liked please Mrs Campbell B.

I've been AWOL from these threads and TA due to real life getting in the way. Caught up now, I did laugh when Kirsty asked toby 'are you for real' with proper incredulity in her voice when chatting her up. It got a mini BOOP from me.

where did everyone go befoe the tea rooms existed? They'll be up for local business of the year.

The Michelin-starred Ambridge Tearooms no doubt

If anyone is Cambridge way on 5 March Emerald O'Hanrahan is at WOWCambridge at the Junction although the programme is utterly baffling so I haven't worked out exactly what time she'd be there - perhaps all day as I think she's localish?

Didnt Carol move back to Ambridge a few weeks ago and taken up the position of Silent Character in Residence?
Re Henwee I wonder if the actor is say,7, and has been told to sound a bit younger than he is, hence the toddler voice.
Boop tonight for Ian and Brian's individual and personal takes on Brief Encounter.

Oh yes I forgot about George. If I'm really lucky I might forget about the whole damn boiling of them.

The annoying thing about Henry is that he speaks like a two year old but his language can sometimes be extremely advanced!

Well if they record Henry in a totally different place, then what he says must be totally down to the script writers. As he would have no idea what, what he is saying means.

I also wouldn't be surprised if they didn't have pre-recorded a number of Henry stock phrases like all his "aw wight"s.

They should get the "Outnumbered" script writers in, those were the only kids to sound like mine.

Just found this thread. Rob has Narcissistic Personality Disorder imo and fantastic this will now come into the national consciousness - been there (escaped 9 yrs ago) and so have lots of sympathy with Helen, but such a shame the SW chose her as a victim given her past and given him every single symptom of NPD.

I'm feeling quite jealous of Lil's new job, as escort and no doubt concubine (please no shower scene, SWs) to Justin.
Unlimited spending money in return for showing him the Ambridge social whirl (no guessing what they will do for the other 23 hours and 55 minutes of the day).

I could quite go for it. At least she already fancies him.

Lillian's storyline is the most entertaining one in a while, quite happy to have more of her and Kate! Brian will presumably decamp to the pub...

Massively behind. Rob's conversation with Kirsty on Helen's phone on Sunday was awful. Do we think Helen was in earshot?

Mummytime Outnumbered was largely unscripted - that's why it was so good!!

I'll be cross if there's an unplanned pregnancy - no excuse for that in 21st century (unless like Hellin you've been raped of course).

You might sometimes think no one in soap land has ever heard of contraception, though. Especially not if they're having an affair. TA isn't like the TV ones, fortunately. There have only been a few over the years, which is probably about right for somewhere the size of Ambridge.

Lillian likes other women's husbands, doesn't she? [disapproving St Smugula voice] Does Justin have a brother too?

Posting on the 'newbie' thread made me realise that we missed a point the other day. When Rob was force-feeding Helen the creamy buttery dinner, what was his weapon of choice? - it was fish, again!

ArgyMargy I'll be cross if there's an unplanned pregnancy - no excuse for that in 21st century (unless like Hellin you've been raped of course).

I know an awful lot of "accident" babies, and their mothers were using just about every kind of contraception you can think of. The one using the coil was even a midwife.

I do tell my DC this frequently - because no form of contraception is 100% reliable.

what was his weapon of choice? - it was fish, again! And it always is fish - tuna, salmon, cod .... Which is quite funny in a village where most people produce their own meat!

Not only is contraception not 100% effective if used properly, but there are also a massive number of otherwise reasonably well-informed people who have no idea how it works and so don't use it properly. When working with university students, for example, I had to explain to a couple of people who, according to their exam results, were amongst the most 'intelligent' people in the country, that giving your friend your pill for one day because she was probably going to hook up with someone and you weren't intending to have sex that day would not work for either of you. Both young women were under the impression that one pill = one day's protection.

Time for a silent, sturdy, baby from Alice. Which might necessitate the return of Amy, just in time to rescue Helen.

And it always is fish - tuna, salmon, cod .... Which is quite funny in a village where most people produce their own meat!

This is why I find myself spending so much time here - someone says something and suddenly whole vistas open before me.

I get it now. Rob's obsession with fish in a village full of meat and poultry is an editorial Mark Of Cain.

In a sense it means I can relax. As long as the SWs are giving him fishy things to say I can be sure the editorial position is that's he's an evil outsider who will inevitably, eventually, be driven out of the civilised world. But if Rob ever starts praising the haggis scotch egg we'll know he's been assimilated ...

Sorry, again I meant "black pudding scotch egg" not haggis. My brain seems to jumble the two.

It's a lovely theory but remember that time when Ian and Adam were coming to dinner. Helen was going to make something I've now forgotten and Rob said no, that wouldn't do, not manly enough, and went out to buy steak.