Is that a ferret in your (Gr)undies or are you just pleased to see me? Discuss The Archers vermin (so many possibilities!) here.

[PseudoBadger]

I'm not sure that ferrets cannot through a thumb sized hole - rats can, and mice can fit through a pen sized hole. But I know the SWs will have researched such a statement carefully

Listening to NewPip last night, I was ever more incredulous that she's allegedly a drama school graduate. I want to know which school, if only to make sure that if I can advise any aspiring drama students I come across to avoid it.

forgery is too far fetched

firstly, if she had taken the envelope the other day she would have seen the official nature of it and queried

secondly, it was waiting on the side for him implying she had put it there when it arrived with the post

SL wise if it turns out Jess is a few sandwiches short of a picnic then it might help to humanise rob a little and not leave him as this panto villain

in a lot of ea relationships people can't believe it because he is such a nice guy, he's been through so much etc so this would be a nice twist

Stickorocks If the real letter HAD been taken to Rob's by Hellin on Wed. then surely she would 've asked him about it then?

Did anyone laugh at the CA of last night's; he said after the news that Peep is effing orf ref. Dave and Ruth "Their expressions are as frozen as Lilian's face"

If the real letter HAD been taken to Rob's by Hellin on Wed. then surely she would've asked him about it then?

Rob got Helen out of the house on Thursday on some spurious errand (did she actually go to Berrow or was she merely going somewhere for Knob?) so he could waylay the postie with the real envelope. He then had a template to produce the forgery (with work's scanner, photocopier etc) so - ta dah! - he knew what was in Friday's envelope.

And he put it in the post...so it artived as expected.

I still say chimera.

Maybe all this is to cast doubt on Jess's character so that any further claims she makes will not be believed i.e. if he beats her up or she tries to warn H.

All a bit odd though.

Maybe all Rob's assertions that H is weak and fragile will actually come true too and he is just looking after her. Maybe the sab hit him first and tuna does make him boak.

SOC did imply the EA sl was in listeners' heads.

Perhaps the point of this SL was that Helen actually wasn't 100% sure rob was being truthful - She made damned sure he went for the test and didn't sound like she was confident what the letter would say. So now if some other situation arises- eg if Jess turns up to warn her of his abusive nature- then Helen will be that much more likely to believe rob.

minkGrundy, I think they would have to do an incredible amount of explaining and backtracking to reverse the EA storyline. For instance, with reference to the tuna, Rob may well genuinely hate it, but the problem was that Helen told him she was going to cook it and he said not one word.

We did wonder a while back whether a wily SW had slipped the EA storyline past SOC's radar. He did sound a bit surprised on Feedback that listeners had picked up on it.

ppeat I'm trying to be optimistic. If the Ambridge flood was farfetched, maybe the SW will latch onto my idea and run with it.

Maybe Jess went on MN and ppl said the bairn would be better off without a twat for a dad. And she sent in the wrong child's dna.

Or maybe he just isn't the dad. He never slept with her (although he never once denied it all he said was she is sleeping with allsorts). And he was in fact with the same person he was with on valentine's.

I'm still befuddled.

When it was Emma involved with both Grundy brothers the DNA result, although disappointing for Ed (and Emma) set up a lifetime of interesting stories. I just cannot see where they're going with Ethan's parenthood.

I wonder if this was devised by the same person who brought us so much back story to Paul's family - for no purpose whatsoever.

here's my fear

this has been a long slow build up to the surprise Rob isn't the dad and then BAM - richard locke announces at the lunch that he is in fact dan's dad

that would be so ridiculous i may have to stop listening. As I would if it turns out knob is the dad and there has been an elaborate forgery plan

as for Rob not being Dad - I think it's perfectly reasonable - doesn't stop him being an EA twat but means Helen has been wound in the web a little closer and even less likely to feel anything Jess has said may be true.

and he wasn't with jess on valentines day because jess was at the cottage and was surprised to see helen living there

Helen does seem very torn atm. She definitely had doubts in her mind about the DNA results.

And now with the new farm shop plan...in her heart she knows it is absolutely the perfect project for her to take on, it' shed passion. But then there is Rob telling her that it's not the right thing to do both for her and Henry. She wants to believe he only ever has their best interests in mind but if she is honest with herself there is no plausible reason why she couldn't take on the shop and still be a good mum to Henry. I think she has a real sense of things not being quite right somehow but she either can't put her finger on it or doesn't want to realise it.

I wonder if the whole paternity thing has turned out to be a big red herring then maybe it will be the farm shop that causes a major blow out...

*it's her passion, not shed passion

When the heck does Henry pop off to school? 2016?

He should be going this September. Missed storyline opportunity!

or not pseudo

cue helen on 31 August

'oh my god, i forgot to apply for a school place for henry'

Don't all the ambridge state school kids seem to go to the same primary school by default? Surely a school places SL must be overdue. Is Keira the same age as Henry?

Yep think she'd be in the same year too. I'm sure Rob would rather Helen home schooled he go private?

Obviously state school wouldn't be good enough for Knob's child, but Henry isn't his! Can't imagine him forking out to privately educate another man's child.

Rob wasn't with Jess on Valentines day. But J claimed he had been a week or two before when he was also away. So was he with another woman on valentines as Jess implied? And possibly never with Jess. Or was he not with anyone else on either occasion? They have spent well over a year setting all this up.

Dan was an IVF baby. Richard Locke helped Shula after Mark's death by giving her injections, not by doing the insemination! Shula was already pregnant before Mark died, she just didn't know it. I think that's how it was, anyway.

Whatever else we may say about SOC, surely he hasn't gone back and totally rewritten any past storyline, has he?

... Think that milk bottle is still rolling around somewhere ...

I'm confused, Rob told Helen the result 'in' the letter, but I didn't think he actually gave her the letter to read. He just said what a waste of time it had all been and deflected her from seeing it.

That's what I thought had happened anyway.