Are we mad to sell up our lovely home?

[hearthat]

We have a large 4 bed semi, 3 double beds, one single. Huge kitchen, loads of storage, 2 large reception rooms, flat south facing garden etc. We’ve been here 27 years and brought our children up here very happily.

Children have now flown the nest and realistically the house will be a bit big for just me and DH. It’s 50 years old so we are looking at the possibility of a new roof which we have had quotes for around £13k. The gardens could do with new fencing and block boundary walls built etc - all a lot of work for a house that will be a bit big.

House has been valued for £325k. I will not downsize for less than a 3 bed and ideally that would need to be detached.

We would like something newer built, smaller and a bit more cosy / warmer in the winter. Newer Houses near us and nearer to shops etc are around £315k for 3 bed detached. So by the time we sell and pay fees we are no better off financially - effectively swapping to a smaller house for no gain.

I worry about fitting in our furniture- one house we saw that was 14 years old you could barely fit chests of drawers in by the time the beds were in. It was on for £310k and it was a semi. Higher prices as it had a garage (ours doesn’t) and it’s round the corner from shops and a nice pub etc.

So conflicted about whether we are doing the right thing. I’d like to be closer to amenities but it feels like we are making a financially silly decision to have a smaller house for no financial gain.

Has anyone done the same later in life? How did it work out?

The other thing is, the stress of moving will only be worse the later you leave it. We left our family home of 25 years because we needed the money, it would have been over my dead body before that. It was a great opportunity to declutter, organise, get some money and learn just how adaptable you can be. I really love our home now because it feels like everything has been chosen and is wanted. I’m quite proud of doing it and the outcome

It depends. If you are currently a really long way from amenities and top priority is to be right in the middle of things, then go for it.

One thing I wouldn’t do is buy a bungalow aged 60 or even 70, unless health was really failing and you’d become disabled. There is very strong research evidence that people age much faster when they are not obliged to climb stairs. The conclusion in the studies is to put off single-storey living as long as possible. And if you buy a flat - get at least second floor, go out everyday for a walk and make yourself use the stairs until you can’t physically do it any more.

Do you think your kids will ever come back to visit maybe with grandchildren in future? Again if so that might be a reason to keep the larger property for a while.

Things to consider

1. you need to face the fact that you will have to let go of a lot of stuff including unsuitable furniture that won't fit into a smaller footprint of property. Until you have really embraced the idea that your home is going to be different to where you are now, there is no point moving.
2. your new property needs to be less expensive to maintain and run. Things like council tax, reduced costs of keeping the house and garden in good repair, and reduced effort to maintain. If all you're doing is buying into a property with identical running costs, that's a waste of time.

if I were you I'd give yourselves a year to prepare, do nothing other than downsize the contents of your house, to start the mental and emotional transition towards the next stage of your life. In a few months with a new mindset you will alepready be much more ruthless about getting rid of things you realise won't add value to your future life. You may feel very reluctant to let go now, but that's because you haven't accepted this massive change. Give yourself time to adjust.

Modern properties tend to have small bedrooms, in fact small everything. If you are used to having a bit of space it will feel small. If you have children potentially visiting and maybe having partners and children of their own you may regret losing the 4th bedroom.

Can only speak for where we are based, but you wouldn’t make a saving moving from 4 bed semi to 3 bed detached, you would make a saving moving to 3 bed semi. Doesn’t sound worth your while, but you already know that…

Lower utilities are important as costs will keep going up.
Location is very important, what happens if you lose the ability to drive
I think it’s good to think about it early, many leave it too late.

Stay where you are and do the improvements needed. To move house that will only earn you £10k isn’t worth it. By the time you pay moving fees, agency, solicitor, survey and then pay stamp duty, you may as well have paid to fix your roof!

Why does your 50 year old house need a new roof? I’ve lived in houses from 1850 - 1968 and never had to put on a new roof.
We’re in our 70s and are buying a 4 bed detached. If you love your home, sounds like you do and can afford the bills then stay where you are.
In my experience children who have flown the nest often return, even as a temporary measure.

I was going to say the same thing about the roof. Are you sure your roof needs to be replaced after only 50 years?

You don't actually want to downsize so it sounds like a lot of work for no real change.

There is a lot of hidden cost in moving house as you have to change furniture that doesn't fit, decoration to make it your taste or where the old owners furniture/pictures have left faded patches, small repairs that you didn't expect etc.

That is all fine if it's a move you really want to do but yours sounds like something you feel you ought to want to do.

I’m really surprised that a huge 4 bed can only be worth 15k more than a 3 bed in your area.

I’d like to move to a bigger place but where I am a 4 bed costs at least 100k more and often more like 200k more. Are you sure the price difference and your valuation is right? Have you had a few valuations done?

Yes, it’s called Bungalow Legs and nobody wants that 😹

Depends how much work/updating it needs, they’ve lived there nearly 30 years and it wasn’t new when they bought it. Might even potentially need some rewriting., new boiler, kitchen, bathroom If the 3bed is detached with a garage many will value that over a 4th bedroom

The roofs put on in Victorian abc Edwardian houses were probably a lot better than on 70s/80s builds

We’ve got an old 4 bed semi and we love it - 4 double bedrooms and lots of downstairs living space.
when we were renting before we rented a 3 bed modern semi and in comparison it was really really small, the 3rd bedroom was like a walk in cupboard/ small office and we viewed some other new builds and they were all the same size wise.
this one came up and it’s perfect but I guess different things suit people at different stages in your life.

My mum is in a large detached house with 5 bedrooms, an office, two huge reception rooms, a large dining room and a separate large kitchen. The house is very cold. I even find it cold in the summer! But she and my late dad were/are hoarders so there is stuff everywhere including in the large garage and shed. She refuses to move into somewhere more manageable plus she’d have to get rid of some stuff which she obviously can’t do. She has hired a gardener so the outside is kept tidy but point blank refuses to hire a cleaner.

This was my thought. My house was built in the 19th century and I don’t think it’s had a new roof.

we won’t downsize until the kids are stable and independent and we can go straight to a city/town centre flat. No point spending the money to go from a big house to a slightly smaller one.

I thought you were going to say you were mid 70s, not 50. I’d stay where you are if you can afford it and are happy

Oh the house is 50 years old! I’d still stay anyway

Do you have a link to this strong evidential research? Its trotted out here regularly but when I go to look for evidence of any quality all I find is people referring to evidence without linking to it.

There are many countries where apartment and bungalow life is the norm. I’m not aware of them having excessively immobile elderly populations as a result.

Just to add, I am in a similar position to the OP. My house is too big for my needs and if I lost my husband I would struggle to manage it. But I don’t need to move yet.

My plan is to get my house to a “market-ready” state in the next 6-12 months while keeping an eye on what’s selling. In my town there are a handful of specific streets that I would consider moving to so if the right house came up in the right place I’d want to be able to move fast.

@hearthat I would look carefully at the local market - around my way downsizing from a large 4 bed semi to a 3 bed detached would cost you money, not save money (and that is before you include all the costs of moving, stamp duty, fees etc). If the roof is really end of life then any survey on your place and in the current market will try to knock down the price.

You don’t give your ages but it may be more cost effective to do the work on your existing house and budget for some adaptations when you need them. If you have large rooms and good layout then adapting it for old age becomes easier. Either than or do the improvements but plan to stay another ten yers or so before downsizing. Adult children sometimes boomerang when you least expect it, grandchildren want to visit - keep your options open until further down the line.

I'm currently planning to move from our 5 bed house to a three bed flat. I have a particular building in mind so we are waiting for the right flat to come up. We won't make any money because the flat would be only slightly less than that house and the service charge is quite high. But the facilities are really good (concierge, gym, gorgeous gardens), it's really close to a useful suburban village and I think being on a single level will be important as DH and I age.

I'm not quite 60 yet so it's not a huge rush, more of a 5 year plan. What's driving me not wanting to be in my Mum's position. She is 84 and considered moving when she was in her early 70s and decided not to because she loves her garden too much. She wouldn't be able to move now as she has dementia and wouldn't cope with a new place, anyway she still doesn't want to. But there is a LOT of having to work around her determination to stay in her home. I have no particular fondness for this house, it's fine but functional, so I don't have my Mum's need to stay put and I want to make a final move while I still have plenty of energy. In your position I probably wouldn't make what sounds like an intermediary move, there is a chance it wouldn't be suitable for old age and you'd have to move again. However you're probably a lot younger than me so have more time before you need to consider old age.

OP, you’d be crazy to move. Once your DC settle down and you have DGC, you’ll be glad of the space in the house, the bedrooms and the garden.

I am bemused by the alleged bungalow legs syndrome. In my home country bungalows are very common because there’s a lot more space and land is therefore much cheaper. There is no talk of “bungalow legs” at all and no-one is aging any faster than people are here.