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Regret buying this stupid house

201 replies

Cantbelieveididit · 04/01/2026 23:15

Not sure what I’m even looking for other than to vent.
I have bought a house and it was a terrible mistake.
I have financially pushed myself to the limit so haven’t got extra cash to do all the things I didn’t realise needed doing to improve things.
I bought the house 4months ago- had a survey done and nothing was flagged so can’t even blame that and we viewed it twice.
since moving in I’ve realised the neighbours directly behind are horrible and noisy- music blasting, screaming at their kids and arguing at 2am with a constant smell of weed.
Neighbour next door is a grumpy old man who is constantly looking over the fence and will only acknowledge my husband. School catchment is awful.
Another neighbour seems to have issues with the trees at the bottom of the garden, before we completed the previous owners through the solicitors said they were going to fell them due to a neighbour worrying about them, my husband stupidly said no don’t cut them. Now it looks like she’s investigating for subsidence due to foliage around her property (our trees and another neighbours it seems) .. nothing official yet so again previous owners didn’t have to do anything , they did cut them yearly I think, the other neighbour didn’t.
when we bought the house I couldn’t believe our luck- it was so cheap and thought it was the dream house.. new kitchen, massive driveway and garden, 5 bedrooms… now I realise why.
why was I so stupid to think we were getting a bargain.
how soon can we put it up for sale?

OP posts:
TheLemonLemur · 05/01/2026 15:37

Its done now and you will learn from your mistakes - things like school catchment you will know to look at next time. I would try to wait until 6 months at least. The costs of moving is so high can you do anything to offset? I moved around the same time and feel your pain with higher bills/not having the money spare for works but in meantime I am doing small things where I can to add some value plus looking into grants etc to pay for some of the bigger work eg new boiler

WinterWooliesBaa · 05/01/2026 16:12

BillieWiper · 05/01/2026 13:06

Repeatedly report your new noisy aggressive neighbours to the police for smoking weed in their own house?!

That's not going to end well.

Might not where you live, but it woukd get police attention here as they're doing their best to stop the county lines & are interested in anti social users.

Newyearawaits · 05/01/2026 16:16

DallasMajor · 05/01/2026 03:31

I wouldn't. The house sounds great, better than you could afford elsewhere I take it.

The things you list are changeable, and possible to happen anywhere you move.

The trees- you say foliage causing subsidence? Sounds like she wants more light, but she won't have a right to have them felled- what does the other neighbour think.

Old man- put up some trellis on the fence so he can't look over- that's cheap- who cares if he is ignorant - either ignore him or he extra cheery.

The other neighbours are more annoying, but unless you can afford to move somewhere with no neighbours then they will be a possibility wherever you go.

Schools, schools change all the time, what is poor now might be great in a couple of years. Plus pupil numbers are dropping so more change to get a school out of catchment.

Moving is always difficult, think about the good things.

Brilliant advice
I moved home about 9 months ago and it's not unusual to feel regretful and overwhelmed.
OP, you need to take this step by step and make it your home.
There are less than perfect aspects wherever you live.
I have met some lovely neighbours and those that are less so.
There are things that need doing in my home that I can't afford right now but it will eventually be sorted.
Start putting personal touches to your home and keep smiling at the grumpy neighbour.
I honestly don't believe that moving is the answer right now and it will cost you more money.

LibertyLily · 05/01/2026 16:18

We've experienced remorse with a couple of our house purchases.

First one was fairly rural with only two near(ish) detached neighbours. We didn't know the area as it was a long distance move and although we'd tried to speak to the neighbours on one of our two visits to the property, we'd been unlucky.

On moving in day we went to introduce ourselves to the closest one. They were an older couple (early seventies?), but he was the only one home at the time. He seemed a bit unfriendly, but we assumed shy/unused to strangers. Almost immediately he launched into a tirade about the other - further from us - neighbour, who had recently started hosting functions at their huge property. He wanted us to support him in his attempts to get these stopped and tbh, came across as a completely obsessed nutter.

We went 'home' with me in tears (it was a repossession that had been trashed, so needed everything done, so not remotely homely) and determined to put the house straight into auction to get shot of it (but we stuck it out, fully renovated and made a big profit when we sold).

The first function was a wedding several months later - the only noise we really heard was a harpist playing in the grounds. Apparently, Mr Mad went up to the boundary hedge closest to where she was playing and poked a noisy power tool though the foliage to disturb her!

They were only allowed to hold four functions per year and when covid happened they stopped/sold up. In almost seven years we never met Mrs Mad and wondered if he'd bumped her off!

The other house we immediately regretted was another with a nutjob neighbour. There was a (admittedly huge) specimen cyprus conifer on our side boundary and at our first meeting he asked when we'd be chopping it down, because he had to hoover the pipe needles from his drive! We liked the privacy it afforded, so said we had no plans to remove the tree, at which point he became all shouty and irate.

A matter of days later we came home to find he'd had a tree surgeon cut it in half...vertically so that no branches overhung the boundary, but as the tree was some distance inside our land they'd cut right back to the trunk - it looked bloody awful. We'd have been perfectly happy to trim back the offending branches if he'd asked nicely without becoming threatening. We sold that house after three years to move closer to family, by which point the nasty neighbour had died (probably combusted in anger!)

Cantbelieveididit · 05/01/2026 16:25

The neighbour that argues/ shouts is actually terrible. The mum screams at her partner? And kids all the time and the language is awful.
you can hear them arguing about drugs and there’s a constant smell of weed. I am dreading what it will be like in the summer.

house wise- the kitchen is brand new and it is gorgeous but the rest of the house has just been decorated badly so needs redoing which isn’t too bad but there’s cracks showing (again now picked up in survey but they haven’t magically appeared) I just didn’t see all the faults when looking around

the trees- I’m so annoyed my husband told them through the solicitors not to cut the trees down, they stated it was due to neighbour worrying and they were willing to pay and have it done before exchange.
but on the other hand if we cut the trees down then the horrible neighbours will be looking directly into our garden.
i hate this house

OP posts:
LibertyLily · 05/01/2026 16:27

I just realised that both of ours were issues caused by grumpy old(er) men 😳

NimbleHiker · 05/01/2026 16:32

I would stick it out for a bit longer. I hated my house when i first moved in 3 years ago but now i love it. I reminded myself of why i moved. You could get bad neighbours if you moved and the schools could improve.

ChikinLikin · 05/01/2026 16:37

Cantbelieveididit · 05/01/2026 16:25

The neighbour that argues/ shouts is actually terrible. The mum screams at her partner? And kids all the time and the language is awful.
you can hear them arguing about drugs and there’s a constant smell of weed. I am dreading what it will be like in the summer.

house wise- the kitchen is brand new and it is gorgeous but the rest of the house has just been decorated badly so needs redoing which isn’t too bad but there’s cracks showing (again now picked up in survey but they haven’t magically appeared) I just didn’t see all the faults when looking around

the trees- I’m so annoyed my husband told them through the solicitors not to cut the trees down, they stated it was due to neighbour worrying and they were willing to pay and have it done before exchange.
but on the other hand if we cut the trees down then the horrible neighbours will be looking directly into our garden.
i hate this house

Keep the trees unless you are legally obliged to fell them. Consult an expert to find out if they're causing any structural problems. If they aren't, just keep them and ignore the neighbour who is whinging about them.

Macaronichee · 05/01/2026 16:56

ParallelLimes · 05/01/2026 04:01

There’s another thread going this week where someone says their lender won’t lend on a flipped property (one that is sold too soon after purchase) and I think posters said lenders get unsettled if the place is sold less than 6 months after purchase so I’d wait 1-2 months yet. Also as a prospective buyer I wouldn’t touch something someone bought then immediately sold, it screams “this house is falling down” or “the neighbours are a drug den one side and a cult the other side”.

This.
Most lenders won’t lend on a property bought less than 6 months ago, regarding it as a ‘flipped property’, potentially a money laundering risk. HMRC can also get involved if you make a profit on it. ‘Flipped’ properties can attract extra tax.
You will have wasted your stamp duty and have to declare the issues with neighbours when you try to sell.
Try to build bridges with the more reasonable neighbours and learn to love it for a bit longer, at least?

BillieWiper · 05/01/2026 17:05

WinterWooliesBaa · 05/01/2026 16:12

Might not where you live, but it woukd get police attention here as they're doing their best to stop the county lines & are interested in anti social users.

But it would not stop the neighbours from being arseholes, or from smoking. It could make them enraged and deliberately even more annoying. Targeting OP even worse.

HK04 · 05/01/2026 17:13

Sounds miserable OP. Any redress against the previous owner not disclosing problem neighbours under Property Misdescription Act? rah.co.uk/what-you-have-to-declare-about-neighbours-when-selling-your-home/

If you flip the property ultimately it’s like wanting someone else to suffer but I’d be cross the sellers didn’t let you know what the lay of the land was.

StephensLass1977 · 05/01/2026 17:14

I've always had bad neighbours. I've lived in maybe 5 houses over my entire life. I've always been ultra considerate, and so has my family, and now my partner. It's just never been reciprocated.

Where we are now, one side keep stealing our parking spaces, he regularly repairs vehicles in our shared courtyard, and the householder's girlfriend has absolutely feral kids. He doesn't work. Aged around 40. Saving grace he bought his gf her own house, so they don't live here anymore.

The other side is the one who really does my head in. She's an alcoholic who doesn't work, and she has THE loudest TV and sound system you can imagine, plus an untrained yappy dog. You can hear her all the time, screaming with laughter at whatever trash she's watching. All day long our walls thump due to her surround sound. Partner tried to talk to her as we do get on apart from the noise issue, and as her alcoholism is getting worse, she told him to fuck off and "don't try me!"

My point is not to move because of your neighbours!! Neighbours are always shit and there is absolutely no guarantee you will get nice ones. In my 50 years I have never managed it.

Raisondeetre · 05/01/2026 17:18

Theroadt · 05/01/2026 13:02

Sell it. Life is too short. Simply say you have been offered a job elsewhere.

I would agree. I have lived in a house i hated from day one for eight years now. Previous house we lived in had batshit neighbour causing stress over trees. It caused untold misery. Life is too short.

eatreadsleeprepeat · 05/01/2026 17:39

At this time of year you are not going to be using the garden much so take a few months while you do what you can and gather information.
Nosy next door, as pp suggested get a trellis and something fast growing.
Trees at the bottom of the garden, keep to be something of a barrier between you and the family from hell. Speak to the neighbour who is anxious about them and find out why, evaluate whether she is reasonable in her concerns and possibly reach an agreement on some trimming work. I like trees but accept that they sometimes need to be managed.
What age are your children? If not going to school this coming summer then you have time.
Do what you can to make the house feel like a home, kitchen already good so enjoy that, move onto a living room, then bedrooms you use, then other areas. Get someone to look at the cracks to assess whether they are of real concern or cosmetic. Make yourself find things that you like to help you reframe your thoughts.
Find out if the family from hell are owners or renters.
Hopefully be the summer you will have enough information to make informed decisions and have had a chance to see if it can become a home.

Charlize43 · 05/01/2026 17:46

These are all externals and areas change with the years.

A friend of mine had the reverse, she bought a house in a lovely genteel area, had lovely neighbours for the first 3-5 years during which the lovely old police station at the end of her street was shut down, then the council decided to demolish it and build social housing. Next the wooded, grassy children's play area was taken and more social housing built, and with that came the usual anti-social behaviour, broken furniture and mattresses dumped on the street, etc. A lot of the houses were bought up and turned into HMOs which were then leased to the Council for more social housing (that's London, for you). Now she basically lives in a dump of litter and disrepair.

Mumstheword1983 · 05/01/2026 17:53

DallasMajor · 05/01/2026 03:31

I wouldn't. The house sounds great, better than you could afford elsewhere I take it.

The things you list are changeable, and possible to happen anywhere you move.

The trees- you say foliage causing subsidence? Sounds like she wants more light, but she won't have a right to have them felled- what does the other neighbour think.

Old man- put up some trellis on the fence so he can't look over- that's cheap- who cares if he is ignorant - either ignore him or he extra cheery.

The other neighbours are more annoying, but unless you can afford to move somewhere with no neighbours then they will be a possibility wherever you go.

Schools, schools change all the time, what is poor now might be great in a couple of years. Plus pupil numbers are dropping so more change to get a school out of catchment.

Moving is always difficult, think about the good things.

This. You might just be a bit overwhelmed with it all and this could all change giving time.

Good luck OP ✨

joeninetey · 05/01/2026 18:04

Not to be nosey, but how much was the house ?

Cantbelieveididit · 05/01/2026 18:05

Thanks for all the replies.
previous owner wise I think they just knew it was a good time to move and bounced before they needed to declare or do anything. The women regarding subsidence she hasn’t actually had any confirmation , she is getting a report but apparently it will take months, so far it’s just her asking previous to trim trees and they did- so I don’t think we have much of a leg to stand on. Especially when they have proof of them offering to fell/ reduce them for neighbours ease.
I can just see us having to fell lovely trees at a huge cost and it’s going to look terrible.

nightmare neighbour- she is awful, I have never heard anything like it, how we managed to view the house without clocking it- we must have been unlucky because if I heard it it would have been a deal breaker. It’s a row of houses behind which are all rented.

annoying nosey neighbour I can cope with but it’s just another issue to overwhelm me, he’s in the garden constantly and tuts if we even chat outside.

I just can’t believe I was stupid enough to think you get a bargain when buying a house.

OP posts:
WonderingWanda · 05/01/2026 18:32

I wouldn't be worrying about the trees. Trees can cause subsidence, especially thirsty ones in dry soil but that's just something she will have to pursue through her insurance company, not something you need to be stressing about.

Delphiniumandlupins · 05/01/2026 18:35

Complain about the noisy weed-smokers to their landlord. If it's a housing association or local authority they will have policies and procedures to follow. Get your DH to speak to the grumpy one, if he won't engage with you then just forget he exists and block his view as much as possible. Re the trees, you just have to wait and see if anything comes of the report. Maybe liaise with the other neighbours with trees?

Good luck.

Catsandcwtches · 05/01/2026 19:12

If it’s just bad decoration you can easily get that sorted. You could repaint it yourself to save money. I had a crack in my old house which the surveyor said didn’t affect the structure.

Charliede1182 · 05/01/2026 19:12

We moved due to really noisy and antisocial neighbours 10 years ago. Their all night parties and neglected dogs barking their heads off were making me ill. Best decision ever.

We couldn't sell either and did a "let to buy" - rented out the house and use the money to either buy or rent elsewhere.

I had never heard of this but after a visit to a mortgage broker it worked out a really good option.

You can always move back in future if the neighbours have changed and kids already have a school place.

But I'd get the trees cut down as if they are causing bother real or imaginary to your neighbour this could be an ongoing pain in the arse even if you aren't living in the property if they start sending solicitors letters etc.

Cantbelieveididit · 05/01/2026 19:13

joeninetey · 05/01/2026 18:04

Not to be nosey, but how much was the house ?

400k- previous owners bought for 310k 10 years earlier but have done an extension and other bits. When you look closely you can see the finish is bad but actual work is done properly but the whole house just needs redecorating - new skirting boards, carpets - things that add up throughout a whole house.
If/when we sell I don’t see how we could make any sort of profit due to ceiling price - if anything I think we will have to reduce.
im so angry with myself, I convinced my husband to move, he wanted to stay in our old property and he wasn’t fully sold on this one saying the area was ‘a bit rough’ but I stupidly just saw the house alone and the price and thought we were getting an offer we couldn’t refuse.

OP posts:
Dissappearedupmyownarse · 05/01/2026 19:14

Cantbelieveididit · 04/01/2026 23:15

Not sure what I’m even looking for other than to vent.
I have bought a house and it was a terrible mistake.
I have financially pushed myself to the limit so haven’t got extra cash to do all the things I didn’t realise needed doing to improve things.
I bought the house 4months ago- had a survey done and nothing was flagged so can’t even blame that and we viewed it twice.
since moving in I’ve realised the neighbours directly behind are horrible and noisy- music blasting, screaming at their kids and arguing at 2am with a constant smell of weed.
Neighbour next door is a grumpy old man who is constantly looking over the fence and will only acknowledge my husband. School catchment is awful.
Another neighbour seems to have issues with the trees at the bottom of the garden, before we completed the previous owners through the solicitors said they were going to fell them due to a neighbour worrying about them, my husband stupidly said no don’t cut them. Now it looks like she’s investigating for subsidence due to foliage around her property (our trees and another neighbours it seems) .. nothing official yet so again previous owners didn’t have to do anything , they did cut them yearly I think, the other neighbour didn’t.
when we bought the house I couldn’t believe our luck- it was so cheap and thought it was the dream house.. new kitchen, massive driveway and garden, 5 bedrooms… now I realise why.
why was I so stupid to think we were getting a bargain.
how soon can we put it up for sale?

People die and people move...... you can live in hope!

Runnermumof2 · 05/01/2026 19:17

Put it straight up. There's no min limit of time

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