Need inspo for our house.

[InNeedOfInspo]

Have been in our house for nearly 20 years. Me, husband, teen and dog.

We’re struggling to use it for everything we need to, with 2 of us working from home and hobbies etc. DH thinks the answer is a garden room, but I want to explore other options first.

Attached is the floor plan as it is now. In addition we have an extension on the back of a double garage that measures 4.5m x 3.5m and has a multipurpose room downstairs (currently a gym) with a shower room and an office upstairs with a sofa bed and an electric piano.

DH and I both work from home - him more or less 100% of the time and me 60% of the time. The desk in the extension is the only one with additional monitors so we end up fighting over it. I have a tiny standing desk at the back of the living room but can only fit a laptop on it.

We don’t have enough storage in the kitchen, so the dining room has become the overspill area, along with the utility room. We don’t sit to eat in the dining room, partly because it is cramped but mostly because our schedules mean we all end up eating at different times.

Upstairs I have Bed 1 and the en-suite, DD has bed 4 for sleeping, books and clothes and DH has bed 2. Again, this is due to schedules and everyone getting enough sleep. Bed 3 has DD’s toys, the family Lego, a desk and sofa bed. It’s mainly used by DD. DD and DH share the family bathroom.

We have too much stuff, and need to declutter and we need to replace the windows and doors within the next couple of years. This has led to a discussion about potential garden room (garden faces north so would take the only sunny spot) or extensions, and I’m thinking about internal layout as well.

We need a proper working space for me which is separate to the outside office. We need to house the musical
instruments more effectively and ideally together (at the moment there is a drum kit in the living room, piano in the office and smaller instruments in bedroom 3).

I would like a more functional kitchen and utility room with significant storage (the quote I had from a designer for kitchen, utility and dining room had 36 units).

We intend to stay in the house for at least another 10 years, possibly forever. Happy to spend money to make it work better for us but not so much that we never realise it at resale. We’ve biggest house on the street and the existing extension probably took us over the ceiling price.

I can’t help but think that with 3 of us in a relatively large house we shouldn’t need to extend or add a garden room
to achieve these objectives but I’m struggling to see what could be possible.

Any thoughts or ideas welcomed.

Who cleans all this cluttered space?

It would take the only sunny space in the garden though. I’m struggling a bit with that but I agree it’s the easiest option.

You're not doing her any favours long term with this approach. Do you think she's going to have two bedrooms to herself for the rest of her life?

Anyway, in answer to your main dilemma, I would be looking to move to a property that meets your needs better.

it doesn’t feel like a huge extension?

Total usable floor space downstairs is about 12sqm

Upstairs includes the eves and isn’t the full length so it’s less than 9sqm

My first house at 19 had 3 beds and I lived alone…….

Diagnoses are recent so we’re working on the strategies etc. We’re all night owls so “wake up” at bedtime hence she needs a space focused only on sleep just now. I would hope that changes in coming years but these strategies take time.

Have you considered hiring a professional to help you declutter/organise what you have? Not to do it for you, as you'd need to make decisions, but to guide you and to keep up the motivation? It's something loads of ADHDers struggle with and we hire professionals for things like decorating or building work.

I actually think the idea above about applying to Love It Or List It is very smart!

It’s not hard to clean? I’m only at home 3.5 days a week so (my) washing and household cleaning has to get fitted around other things. DH does what he can around work, DD’s activities and the dog (she has a walker a few days a week but not all) and then at the end of the week/weekend floors and bathrooms get cleaned and the kitchen gets a good clean etc.

Sorry - should have answered all of this in one go.

There are boxes of stuff waiting to be listed on eBay. The issue is having the time to do it and then send the stuff. I have sold a few things this week on Vinted but can’t do loads every week as not there to send it in reasonable time. I do a charity shop run most months with clothes and stuff DD has outgrown etc.

Not enough wall or floor space to put all the Lego outside. (no usable walls upstairs). Some of them are massive (eg Death Star). And where would the gym stuff go if the musical stuff was out here?

Agree with stuff fitting the kitchen rather than the kitchen fitting the stuff. Removing the half wall and putting an office in the dining room would reduce how much storage there is though and I can’t easily have meetings when the kitchen is being used/walked through.

Have been watching some design videos which talk about “flow” in the sense of moving around the space. Putting dining table between living space and patio doors means squeezing around to get outside? Same with partition and a door into a separate room.

There are boxes of stuff waiting to be listed on eBay. The issue is having the time to do it and then send the stuff. I have sold a few things this week on Vinted but can’t do loads every week as not there to send it in reasonable time. I do a charity shop run most months with clothes and stuff DD has outgrown etc.

Specify on your ads that you post once a week and then make it a family activity to help you reclaim the space.

Put everything into storage, as if you were moving house. Then do whatever works are required to get your desired layout. Finally let the stuff back in the house that you can't do without. It has to "earn" it's place.

I was looking into body doubling as I’ve been doing it with DD and it seems to help her. Trouble is when I’m with her I can’t be doing other things. There are some virtual body doubling apps that might help.

DH’s autism means he can’t deal with cleaners etc in the house touching stuff so that option is a no, just how. I did think about packing them off to visit family and then taking a week off to do it but they’d both be mortified if I got rid of their stuff. (DH’s is all big stuff like motorbikes and bikes. He also runs a business from home and has kit here for that.)

I know the decluttering needs to happen but I have to bring them with me in the right way to make it work.

2 suspected ADHDers (with 2 suspected ADHD kids) here too so get it! Start decluttering cupboard by cupboard - get the dopamine by buying lovely storage. Be ruthless! It will take AGES which is hard but it needs doing or your stuff will just grow to take any extra space you give it.

I get you need a vision to get that motivation going though.

I'd add glass doors in this style to split the living room - one half for music instruments, one half for living https://www.leaderdoors.co.uk/liberty-doors-oak-fully-finished-internal-farley-1-light-room-divider-set-p122080/s343801

Why can't you use the desk in bed 3 for your WFH? Get a nice cupcoard to enclose it when not in use.

You don't need extra space for sleepovers - I've had 8 in my living room before using sofas, mattresses, etc. It's once in a while so accept the disruption.

As everyone else said you don't need more space, you need less stuff, organsied nicely (looks at own clutter in sympathy). There are apps for ADHD to give you a task buddy which might help, or get a declutter in - they'll be far far cheaper than an extension.

Ooh. That is a good idea. I am sure there used
to be a programme where you empty a room into the garden and then do that but the weather here is horrendous most of the time so our availability and a dry day may not coincide!

Storage is a good idea. You'll soon know what items you miss and what you can live without.

Thank you for understanding. I’ve had undiagnosed ADHD for 30years longer than DD and so I’m having to learn the strategies as well as supporting her with them.

Because of the door and the fireplace can’t split the room in half and the back section would be too small for the (new) drum kit unfortunately. Plus would block the patio doors and we would lose the built in storage there as well.

But I do like the glass doors.

DD’s desk is also her art space and she will be doing GCSEs. It’s fairly new and not a standing desk (which I need, ideally), but I have thought about it. If I put the large monitors I need for detailed work on there there wouldn’t be room for her laptop plus books plus art stuff.

This lady is always popping up on my Facebook videos with space planning. Pay her or someone like her to do some space planning for you. www.juliejonesdesigns.com

Yes. This is growing legs in my brain.

That’s the lady with the flow thing!

I have been a bit overwhelmed by DH starting to obsess about new windows. Whenever I think about changing one thing it leads me to needing to do a hundred other things too, which is then overwhelming and I end up doing nothing.

Don’t want to spend loads on windows and patio doors if we should extend/alter to improve usable space etc.

I’ve lived here so long I can’t see alternative ways to use or adapt the existing layout so hoped someone could see something different here.

Moving isn’t an option just now due to DD’s school etc. We may move once she has her future sorted. And we do like this house and where we live. We’re just needing to change things around a bit to meet different needs to before.

I appreciate the help and advice given here and there are definitely some options worth considering further.

No it’s not clear, it looks like a solid wall on the plan

Your utility room looks quite big - could that be used for your desk? Alternatively could you have the biggest bedroom and have an office desk/cupboard in it for you? Something like this https://www.next.co.uk/style/ST795987/256273

If the living room was split (my bro has doors like the glass ones so can open/close the space as needed) would the front part be big enough for the drums?

So, the kitchen. If we take the half wall out and want a usable kitchen diner, what might be the best options? The 2 corners on the window wall drive me batty. Should we change the size/location of the windows/doors at all? Where would an island go?

I quite like the separate utility room as the bins and washing machine are in there and the kitchen isn’t visible to the street.

It’s not big. Has a run of units as shown plus washing machine, bins and mops and a second fridge freezer in there, the boiler and a run of open wire shelving housing mixing bowls and food processors etc. Would have to lose all that to put a desk in realistically. But I can see why you’ve suggested that.

Living room could only really split 2/3 1/3. The sun comes through the bay so if that was the 1/3 the 2/3 behind would be much darker. And it doesn’t leave space for an office for me.

(a full acoustic drum set is massive.)

• Dining room becomes a music room.
• Get a custom built in at the back of the living room for Lego storage and potential home office for you
• or use the multi purpose bedroom as a home office space for you (again custom build that can be closed off when you’re not using it)

You have enough space just not using it right. If you add another space then it’s just going to fill again and then what? You can’t keep adding on.

Last resort apply to be on sort your life out or my home made perfect.

If kitchen/diner are not as separate as they appear on your plan, then maybe kitchen stuff overflowing into the diner isn't much of a problem? Not top priority anyway.

I think your top priority is that you're trying to work from home with no suitable WFH space. That and working out which room the musical instruments could gather in would give you a sense of direction.