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Pupsandturtles · 21/02/2024 15:53

Ps: I wish there was a ‘LOL’ button for some of these posts.

Bouledeneige · 21/02/2024 15:56

I think the owners passed on the bullshit their interior designers told them to justify the extra cost of shipping Africa/grecian urns to their house. They are now trying to pass their extravagant bill onto hopefully numpty buyers.

commonground · 21/02/2024 16:01

"The Maghreb region of North-Western Africa".

So, um, Morocco?

Horsewhisperers · 21/02/2024 16:17

I don't like it and am sure there are better houses than that in north London. A bath in the bedroom and bunks on the landing!
Why have they got rid of the entrance hall? You step straight into the living area in small terraces at a fraction of the price and it's one thing that would stop me considering a house as it would be cold. Why do it in a large house? It seems mad to me.

Vroomfondleswaistcoat · 21/02/2024 19:00

I've no idea why they make such a big thing of the 'wall of urns', unless they are actually nailed to the wall and the new owner will be expected to keep them and make them a feature?

InstrumentsofTorture · 21/02/2024 19:13

I do actually like it but, as others have said, wouldn't pay £5,000,000 for it (in the very very unlikely event I was ever to have £5,000,000).

I can't decide what's more inflated - the price or the estate agent's prose.

Fernsfernsferns · 21/02/2024 19:27

Heather37231 · 21/02/2024 14:08

Ha ha ha I thought I’d check the full description to see where the gym was and it is indeed in a shed (aka “the ancillary accommodation at the end of the garden” 😂)

But there is also this utterly hilarious bit of pseudery:

The current owners have created characterful interiors that channel the classic aesthetic of rustic minimalism, filtered through an avant-garde perspective on design principles originating in the Maghreb region of North-Western Africa. This has resulted in a bohemian chic that’s subtle and distinctly pragmatic.

WOW

pretentious, moi?

i reckon the owners ghost wrote that themselves.

i reckon they must be nightmare clients.

so if un renovated they go for £3m and the extra sqm is actually a shed in the garden, say £500k for the work (I bet it cost them more but it’s silly so isn’t going to earn them)

it’s probs over priced by £1.5m ish? Punchy!

please tell me Foxtons are the agents? Who else could show it with a straight face?

Amblesidebadger · 21/02/2024 19:35

I really don't understand council tax bands. How is it £5 million and band D?
Relieved I don't live in London but confused by my own council tax being the same.

CorvusPurpureus · 21/02/2024 19:38

Horrible things done to perfectly nice wood in every picture!

The bunk beds are cute. But as s family home, sleepovers aside, they'd just sit there getting dusty.

If the idea is airbnb for big gatherings, I think they may have missed the market. You'd need to charge £ks/night to break even, & it's just not an exciting property.

FuzzyManul · 21/02/2024 19:48

This has resulted in a bohemian chic that’s subtle and distinctly pragmatic.

I wonder if whoever wrote that tripe meant 'paradigmatic'. And even that is stretching it.

PrincessW11 · 21/02/2024 20:46

Agree decor is ghastly & house is wildly overpriced, you could live in Notting Hill for 5mil

Saz12 · 21/02/2024 22:49

Fuck me.

Are they undertakers, storing clients ashes in urns?
The bunk beds are a cute (sorry, clearly I mean "pragmatic") way to get more sleeping space if youre pushed for budget.

housethatbuiltme · 22/02/2024 18:52

Wow I could spend 5 million on a nightmare... its pretty much everything I would HATE in a house.

How much do the owners love urns though?

TragicMuse · 22/02/2024 19:15

AmaryllisChorus · 20/02/2024 15:43

It's horrible! All that wood on the walls and ceilings, bath in bedroom, beds in hall, random massive fireplace not in keeping with the character of the house. It reminds me of grim eccentric landladies in 1980s.
And that area is nothing special. You could buy a beautiful terraced house in Hyde Park or Hampstead village for that.

Agreed! If I had £5M I'd be spending it in Hampstead...

TragicMuse · 22/02/2024 19:21

Church Row, the middle of Hampstead. 5 minutes to the tube.

www.rightmove.co.uk/properties/136054568

Beautiful Well Walk. Right by the heath, and the pub and a 10 minute walk to the tube or down to South End Green for the bus.

www.rightmove.co.uk/properties/143690408

Cannon Place. 7 bedrooms and a 78ft garden.

www.rightmove.co.uk/properties/143050226

Enigma52 · 22/02/2024 19:22

DramaticBananas · 20/02/2024 16:21

I'd want to buy a whole row of terraces for that price!

You probably could in some parts of the country!!

Enigma52 · 22/02/2024 19:28

Saz12 · 21/02/2024 22:49

Fuck me.

Are they undertakers, storing clients ashes in urns?
The bunk beds are a cute (sorry, clearly I mean "pragmatic") way to get more sleeping space if youre pushed for budget.

Had to chuckle, as was thinking the exact same " urn thoughts"!

There has to be significant reasoning behind possessing so many??

AsTheyPulledYouOutOfTheOxygenTent · 22/02/2024 20:04

My personal winner for best terrace house you can get for 5 mill in London. Turns out Ted Lasso's lovely apartment is actually a small chunk of a four floor terrace house on Richmond Green.
https://www.rightmove.co.uk/properties/144473378#/?channel=RES_BUY

You'd have half a million over to buy yourself a seaside flat.

Check out this 4 bedroom terraced house for sale on Rightmove

4 bedroom terraced house for sale in The Green, Richmond, Surrey, TW9 for £4,500,000. Marketed by Savills, Richmond

https://www.rightmove.co.uk/properties/144473378#/?channel=RES_BUY

Ginmonkeyagain · 22/02/2024 20:34

It's ghastly. Reclaimed pallets nailed randomly on the walls, what looks like a Roman ossuary in the living room and bunk beds that looks like the sort of thing a particularly horrible Victorian employer would make their kitchen staff sleep in.

I am mainly thinking particualry suggestable Trustafarian taken for a ride by an interior designer.

FuzzyManul · 22/02/2024 21:01

I am mainly thinking particualry suggestable Trustafarian taken for a ride by an interior designer.

An urn-est interior designer.

Tetchypants · 22/02/2024 21:46

Jesus wept, as if that’s worth £5 million! What a terrible state the housing market is in down there.

housethatbuiltme · 23/02/2024 09:11

The wood is ironically the ONLY thing I like. contrasting that cold entrance room really makes the wood feel warmer. Everything else can get in the bin.

In the real world who wants a bath in the bedroom and kids beds on the stairs... it looks like it was designed by a mad man.

SingingSands · 23/02/2024 10:04

I don't think that's a home, surely that's been renovated to look like that? What a load of dusty old pots. And who set up that chess board?!

Bunk beds on a landing? What idiot thought that would be attractive to a family?!

Heather37231 · 23/02/2024 11:19

SingingSands · 23/02/2024 10:04

I don't think that's a home, surely that's been renovated to look like that? What a load of dusty old pots. And who set up that chess board?!

Bunk beds on a landing? What idiot thought that would be attractive to a family?!

Oh my goodness I just noticed what is wrong with the chess board! That’s hilarious.