Advice please - will a big renovation project ruin our lives?

[SherbertLem]

Hello everyone. This is my first thread on mumsnet 👋

I’m in a dilemma and would be so grateful for some advice. My DH and I have had an offer accepted on a beautiful Victorian house but it’s in need of ALOT of renovation work - we have been so excited.

However, my parents have given us slightly cold feet about the renovation work - telling us it’ll ruin our lives, won’t be finished for at least 5 years, ongoing maintenance costs will be loads, the renovation work will take up every spare moment we have, we won’t be able to do anything to enjoy our lives… hopefully you get the picture.

The work required is certainly no mean feat - we haven’t had a survey yet but we’re expecting to need to sort plumbing, electrics, roof, windows, there’s definitely some damp, the garden is very over grown, it’ll need a new kitchen and bathrooms, a complete redecorate.

We have budgeted to use builders, we know we cannot do most of this ourselves and we are hoping not to live on-site while the bulk of the work goes on. We also both have full time jobs.

I would love to hear if anyone here has been through something similar and can let us know what life is like?

If you’re using builders and can afford the cost of this (incl the inevitable overrun - damp sounds expensive… ) and you’re not living on site, it’s really not that bad. It does take up time, mostly making decisions and ordering stuff. Probably a couple of hours a day, not evenly spread of course, peaks and troughs. It will take a year maybe a little more once you include pre planning and snagging afterwards.

Do you have children?

I think the main thing is having a realistic budget. Ideally take a recommended builder round the house and get a ballpark quote (and add 15%) before you exchange. Ask the builder to assume some non visible horrors like rotten joists.

It mostly depends on how much money you have. We renovated a whole 3 bed 1930s house in a year. We lived in and our children were teens. We had 100k to spend on the house immediately so could almost get it all done. I think with younger children and less budget it could have been a struggle. We took a loan out for the last 30k finishing it. If you’re the sort of person who can live without an oven for 6 months like we did you’ll be ok! Lots of people do it!

I moved out for 6weeks while whole house was renovated. It was less stressful, and actually saved stress and money. Builders were honest that if we were living in house the job would take far longer, as work would progress at a slower rate, and returning house to a livable state at the end of each day would really impact the work.

I’ll also add, things moved quicker as we lived in - decisions were made faster etc. Where will you be living?

I've done it twice and yes it did ruin my life. Big money pits and builders never do reliable estimates, it's always more.
I'm in a modern house now because I'm never doing it again.

Thank you for your responses so far!

We don’t yet have kids but will hopefully have one on the way but the time the project finishes (if it does take ~12-18 months).

We hope we won’t be living on site but won’t be far away so can pop in to see builders every day.

It's almost certainly going to take longer and cost more than you think. If you are realistic about the challenge, have deep pockets and aren't in a rush then you'll be fine. If you are under financial pressure or have a deadline to work to, it will be very stressful. Whether that will impact your well-being or relationship depends on how you both cope under strain and how well you work together as a team.

The biggest factor is how much money you have to throw at it. If you can afford to blitz it when you first move in, or even rent for a few months until it’s done it’ll be easy. Expensive but easy. Do factor in the availability of builders though.

If you don’t have the funds it’ll drag on, but so long as you understand that though it doesn’t really matter, especially if it’s somewhere you can live for a long time.

We recent bought a house that will do us for at-least the next 20 years. It’s very dated but not falling apart. I’m due another baby soon and with a maternity leave coming up we just can’t spend the money on the house right now so I know it’ll be a good 5 years atleast (factoring I’m childcare costs) until the house is beautiful. But that’s okay because we have so much more space here, the location is perfect for us and the gardens amazing. I know we’ll get there one day!

I would also say that as you do more you’ll find more things to do.

For example you might lift something up and find that the floor underneath is rotten.

Or take some wall paper off and find that most of the plaster comes with it. Before you know it you’re getting the whole house re skimmed or worse completely re-plastered.

Then if you’re having it re plastered anyway you’ll think oh we may as well batten out the walls and insulate them better … 15k later ….

Me and my DH brought complete renovation house - my advice is if you want to do it, do it. It's an experience like no other, your parents are projecting, have they ever done anything like this? To this extent? My friends have said they don't know how we're still married and how I have the patience with it all.... because I knew what we brought, they didn't. I would also say - expect to do more than you think and it will take longer than you estimate.

We've done the majority of the work ourselves whilst working full time, it's hard work - no one will understand how much hard work it is and when people start telling you they don't have time to do simple things, you will in the back of you mind be thinking, they have no idea what having no time means. Because they're sitting infront of the tv at 6pm for the night 😂 however, we still have lives, go away, go out for food with friends etc.

Although it's hard work, it's also amazing. Ours needed re-plumbed, re-wired, new boiler, windows, roof, replastering, the extension knocked down and rebuilt, the gardens still ongoing but looking more like a garden now (we neglected it to begin with as it was massively overgrown too, so we got it all ripped out and started again). We're 5 years in. Still bare brick in most of the house with the shower in the hallway and living in the back part of the house now, which is complete. Buuuut, we're so freaking close now! We even had to replace all the floors and ceiling joists so decided to put underfloor all through. So this extended our timeline, like I say though, we've been doing it all ourselves. If we had builders in, it would have been done much sooner, but also cost us much more in labour costs. So many people will tell you they did a renovation job like yours, and as they explain you realise it's nowhere near the same extent as they lived in it from the beginning- ours was unlivable for around 3 years. (Also through covid times when factories shut for a small time and getting materials became difficult).

Someone I know also did a similar project with the father and husband and it took them about 2 years. Stripped back and had to relay some floors. So with workers you'll have it done quicker than it's taken us I'm sure.

It hasn't ruined our lives and has made us much closer and stronger as a couple because we know it's us two, we can do anything we put our minds too, and so can you! My mom was a little like 'ohhh this is a big job are you sure' but I've never been one to shy away and my dad was always doing things in the house and I was always by his side asking what, how and why lol.

I would also recommend getting a full structural survey done. We did. Also most damp issues are cause by the roof, so replace the roof first, let the house air out and see if it clears up before damp proofing/tanking. We didn't need too as all the damp in our house was caused by the roof.

Good luck 😉

Get quotes, asap, materials have really increased in cost, and trades are harder to come by.

Any advice on how NOT to do this?! I can't even bring myself o start our reno project becase every time I plan something the string unravels like this and (in my mind) a simple new kitchen worktop turns into a two storey extension with balcony and loft conversion. 😂

One thing I would also add about builders/tradesmen - don't go with the cheapest just because they're the cheapest, they will most likely cost you more in the long run. Have a few quotes and go with the ones that give you confidence in being able to do the work, do it well and do it to your brief. Don't choose them off cost.

Roofers we're the hardest to find, we eventually found an amazing roofer but it took many not even turning up before we go there.

If you are doing building work, you will need someone on site to make sure things are being done according to the plan - have an architect if possible.

When it comes to the rewire - insist on a bank of rcbo's it will cost more but are much better in the long run and when something trips it won't take the rest of the house out with it.

Where did you get a 12-18 month timeline from?! Are you going to be knocking it down and rebuilding the entire thing from the ground up?! We did a mini reno on our Victorian house - it included internal construction including removing walls, resizing a bathroom, new electrics, flooring, kitchen, re-plastering throughout and decorating – and that took 16 weeks. Our NDN did the same as well as a loft conversion and garden landscaping and theirs took 26 weeks. If you've got a healthy budget and a great builder (we were lucky, ours was amazing, our NDN's was shit) there's no reason for it to be so drawn out. I think your parents are catastrophising big time!

Plan as much as up can on paper. If you can choose all your flooring in advance, bathroom tiles etc then you won't get caught out and make a rushed decision when your builder need to know the thickness of your flooring in order to set out levels. Also any heavy items (chandelier or cast iron bath) need to be a known thing early in the project.

Good lighting makes a huge difference in how comfortable a room is. Get help with a lighting plan in the planning stage, if you can. Interior designers locally may be able to give you help for this for a fixed fee...they are a lot more useful than just for paint colours and cushions!

😂 no real advice other than don’t start unless you can afford to finish!

So @SherbertLem you have made an offer on a house that needs a full renovation but you have no idea of the costs or timescale?
There are plenty of threads that have renovation estimates of 100 to 200 or even 300k.
How big is the house in square meters/feet?
Does it have solid or cavity walls? While you renovate you should really insulate properly.

Please make sure you've run the costs accurately before you buy. We recently took on a mini Reno (all cosmetic, no structural work but the whole house to be done) and it's cost twice what I had anticipated. We've spent £80k just on one bathroom, carpets and wooden flooring, shutters, painting and plastering for a 4 bed. That's it.
Can't afford to do the kitchen for another couple of years now and we were intending to have it done immediately

Forgot to mention, there are other threads where the general consensus is that renovation or fixer upper houses are poor value for money currently due to costs of said work, cost of borrowing, and the stagnant market.

We are renovating a second property at the moment, just to give you an idea OP, we did one last year, the kitchen was twice the size, just ordered and paid for the new kitchen (which is tiny) from the same supplier, same quality of kitchen, it was the same price! Timber is much more expensive, as is paint etc. whatever you are quoted remember it always, always, turns out to be more, as you discover things as you go along. It’s worth doing, but it takes time, needs a lot of organisation and patience. Everytime my mobile rang and I saw it was the plumber, my heart sank, thinking what’s the latest problem he’s found 😱

How did you put an offer in without a survey first?!

@LadyWithLapdog unfortunately the housing market where we live is still quite competitive (due to a school catchment) so you have to secure your offer before doing surveys, etc. We won’t actually exchange without a full survey!

Sorry, it’s been a long time since we bought. Of course you don’t do a survey before offer. My mistake 😒