Do downsizers ever downsize?

[NewbieOnHolidays]

We’ve seen so many detached family houses with husband and wife in their 50-60s (kids grew up and left), so now just 2 people living on 200+ sq.m. They all say they want to downsize, put house on the market at an astronomical price and fail to get offers anywhere close to asking and then just take it off the market. So once again a house came up, after 3 weeks they managed to get about 10 people who wanted to view, did an open day, we put an offer below asking, were now told there were 5 offers with 3 above asking, so they rejected our offer. We’ve been in this boat so many times and it always end up same way: we compete against non existent buyers who are very keen, offer way above asking, then we see the house keeps staying on the market or just disappears without sstc. Same street couple of months ago after 3 rounds of best an final competing against “many interested couples” and upping our offer every time we just got fed up and walked away, in few weeks sellers took it off the market. Do downsizers ever downsize?

Instead of 'othering' have you considered reading the posts that people who have considered downsizing have actually written?

My parents are in their early 70s and live in our childhood home, 4 bedroom big detached house with large garden, double garage etc. They would theoretically like to downsize but two things stop them, the fact that properties they like are no cheaper than their current house, and the fact that while they want fewer bedrooms, less garden etc they don't want to have no space to have friends over for dinner etc and that's hard to find.

But our population size tells a different story - it’s has increased enormously this century.

I think it is entitled to want something that isn’t yours. Home ownership is just that - it belongs to the homeowner, not somebody eyeing it up, wanting it.

Not to mention that many of those bemoaning older people and wanting their homes, will probably be those announcing in their 60s that they need to hang on to their large homes for their children to come and stay 😉

But our population size tells a different story - it’s has increased enormously this century.

Because of immigration & people living longer. We have a huge demographic shift on the horizon which I'm not sure how will be financed.

I am always fascinated by this view. That the rights of people with young children somehow trump others.

I am single and live in a four bedroom house. Do you think I am entitled and I should sell up to make room for a family?

how big a house am I allowed to have? I assume not three bed either. - and not close to any schools? So a one or two bed, no garden away from amenities?

I love to garden - but don’t need a swing set so it’s selfish of me to have a garden. I work from home so need a home office. Is this allowed? It is us up g a space that could be a child’s bedroom? I also own a car - but maybe it would be better is a family with small children had it? Should I only be allowed a moped?
where does it end? Where do the wants of families override my right to buy whoever house I can afford?

In my experience, no they don't move voluntarily, they just think they want to, and like the idea of it.

I offered on a 1,200 sqft, 3 bedroom house, large garden house in London last July. The owner was a person in their mid eighties who'd lived there since 1976, whose spouse had died about 20 years ago, and they had no other family around. In theory, they wanted to move to a 1 bedroom retirement flat.

They let the sale progress for 7 months, during which time I'd arranged a mortgage, done all the conveyancing, sent across an almost 6 figure deposit, and as I work from home sometimes needed internet straight away so had booked Virgin for the following week, when completion was due to take place.

This person waited 7 months until the day of exchange, a week before completion, to say they'd changed their mind, with no further explanation. I fully expect they'll stay in that house until they are taken out.

I'm now buying from a family who I know have a deadline date of end of summer holidays!

That does sound a very frustrating situation op.

Because you have been searching for so long, would you consider looking for a larger flat or maisonette?

Lots of people in Europe raise families in apartments and it works very well.

Maybe if the government removed stamp duty for downsizing it could unlock that part of the market.

Why on earth would the government do that???

In my part of town anyone who bought a property more than 30 years ago, can sell it for many multiples of what they purchased it for, usually at least 10 times more.

Even after buying a new, smaller place, they will still be left with a significant amount of money to pay the stamp duty on the new, smaller place.

I'm not far off paying a similar amount in a month or so.

It make no sense to let the downsizers off because they don't like it; I don't like paying stamp duty either!

Working later has big impact. I am 60 this year and ready to downsize all except for the fact that I can't retire for another 7 years and want to be able to walk to work. All likely moves would be out of the town to gain that garden I have always wanted and never had

It's a bit odd that all the houses you're offering on belong to older people claiming to want to downsize. Why not offer on a house belonging to a family with young children who are moving?

I don’t think it’s specific to children/families with children. I don’t have children myself and I feel selfish for having a 2 bed that it’s just me and DP here when there are dozens of homeless and overcrowded households about. I’d get a lodger but DP doesn’t want to.

Exactly this. It's also why large bungalows are popular. Our house has 4 bedrooms but the living space downstairs is much bigger - large kitchen diner, 3 big reception rooms and a conservatory.
My ideal would be a 4 bed bungalow so I can use 2 of those bedrooms as living space.
I also don't want to end up with a tiny garden overlooked on all sides, I love my garden and a big garden can always be made low maintenance.

I am expecting our next house to cost more tbh, even if it's smaller so releasing equity is not remotely a consideration, in fact it's probably a good use of capital.
DH is 73 and I am 64, younger DC bounced back home unexpectedly for 6 months last year and I would always want room for them if needed.

This thread has been useful for me to crystalise what I would want from a move and what the realities are. Though I don't think house sales are as frantic here as the SE.

I think there are two types of downsizer. The first NEEDS to downsize, whether from a financial perspective or because they need to be living on one level, or are at least struggling to maintain a large house. The other type thinks it would probably be a good idea to downsize, but then looks around and can’t find what they want, or suffers from a lack of realism (the type of downsizer you see on Location Location Location, who can’t comprehend the idea of no separate dining room).

If a prospective seller is a ‘We probably should downsize as this place is a bit big now’ type, but doesn’t desperately need to move, then yes, they’ll hold out for the best price, because the alternative - staying put - wouldn’t actually be a major problem. You might think they want ‘crazy money’, but no one undervalues their biggest asset unless they have no other choice.

Oh yes, this drives me mad. ‘Only three bedrooms?! But we’ve got three grandchildren!’

I wonder if the presenters ever want to point out that, apart from the fact that they’ll stay three or four times a year maximum, grandchildren grow up - and that in five years’ time, going to stay with Granny and Grandpa in the country will have stopped being a treat and have become a chore/punishment.

One of my bridge partners has just downsized. He sold a 5 bed detached house on a large plot and moved to a new build 2 bed flat with communal maintained grounds. He’s single and in his 80s, and was finding the gardening a chore, so it was a sensible decision.
I think it’s more of a wrench for people who have raised children in a family home full of memories. My PILs never downsized their 8 bedroom 18th century pile in the middle of nowhere - FIL died there and MIL remained with a care package until her final few months in hospital. I would hate to leave my own home, as it has all my memories of my lovely DH, who died 30 years ago.

+I wonder if the presenters ever want to point out that, apart from the fact that they’ll stay three or four times a year maximum, grandchildren grow up - and that in five years’ time, going to stay with Granny and Grandpa in the country will have stopped being a treat and have become a chore/punishment*

My Ds is 28. He still goes and sees his grandma in the country. He likes going. It’s definitely not a chore. He’s really close to her.

Having been looking for a bigger house to buy for the last nine months, those that are big enough plus being sold by a family with young children looking to move are unusual. Yes, plenty of 3 bed semis a loonnngg way from the city centre with 2 double bedrooms and 1 box room, but that isn't enough room for our family plus WFH. But presumably those families are also trying to upsize into one of the rarer bigger houses.

In my area all the lovely bungalows have been bought up by developers, demolished and replaced with "retirement complexes".

It'll set you back half a million for a 2 bed flat, then paying monthly service charges on top.

I think people like the idea of downsizing, but there's nowhere for them to downsize to.

Yes, plenty of 3 bed semis a loonnngg way from the city centre with 2 double bedrooms and 1 box room, but that isn't enough room for our family plus WFH. But presumably those families are also trying to upsize into one of the rarer bigger houses

They extend on our road. Nearly every house has an extension. They’re almost like terraces! Rooms over garage and in loft. Kitchen extended into gardens. Some people turn their garages into rooms. There’s always builders vans everywhere.

I suppose too it's less enticing the thought of downsizing from a house where you have room to have your children and grandchildren to stay to something smaller where they'd have to stay in a B and B compared to that upsizing calculation of 'an extra bedroom costs £100k more, cost of x nights per year for relatives in Premier Inn = a lot less'?

My Mum's first downsize was to a house that was still rather large and had enough spare rooms for two couples and their children to stay, all sleeping in actual beds. She had this whole vision of everyone there for Xmas (never happened) and grandchildren staying whereas the reality was this was a very few times per year and totally fizzled out by the time the DNs were in their mid-teens.

We successfully downsized just before Covid happened. We wanted to move to be nearer our daughter but also have a more manageable house and garden. So we moved from a rural cottage with a huge garden to a modern four bed detached with a small garden near many amenities. Our cottage was bought by a couple from the Home Counties and we found our house a week after we accepted their offer, for sale by a youngish couple with three children. It took five months, but that was only because we all agreed to delay completion for our purchasers until the summer hols, as one of them was a teacher.

We talked endlessly about what we would like, what we definitely needed and what we would compromise on. We also agreed that because our period house was the difficult sell potentially, we would prioritise that sale and go into rented if needed. Thankfully that didn't have to happen. We released some equity too, as we now live in a cheaper area. We're mid to late sixties. We were lucky, while we didn't mess about, neither did any of the other parties involved.

My mum did , she paid £25k for her house and sold it for £900k .. obvs over the course of a few years but yes she sold up after dad died .