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Please help us choose where to move to

67 replies

MovingSchmoving · 30/08/2021 08:56

I will give lots of detail (name changed) for context. Apologies in advance for the essay.

DH and I currently live in the south east with 2 DDs (5 months and nearly 3). Bought this house in 2020 for £390k on a 5 year mortgage as a doer upper. We have almost finished everything we wanted to do at this stage, spent about £60k. Thanks to improvements and the rise in prices it is now worth around £450-475k. House prices are obviously quite high here (ours is a 3 bed semi) but there is no specific reason we need to live here - our jobs aren’t tied to this area.

We are thinking of moving at the end of this 5 year mortgage period (sept 2025). This would also coincide with DH finishing some training which would mean he is looking for a different type of work opportunity. Our DDs would be nearly 7 (starting year 2?) and 4.5 (starting reception).

Reasons for moving are mainly for a different lifestyle but also to enable us to have a bigger property without taking on more mortgage. We both grew up in semi rural areas - I was in the countryside near hills/forest/farms and DH near the coast. Neither of us feel “at home” in a very urban environment. It’s not so much that we want to be closer to walks/beaches etc - there is actually a fair amount of green space within a 30-60 minute drive of here - it’s more that we want to get away from the traffic and the proximity to London etc. We’d also like somewhere with more community feel, but it might be tricky to find what we are after - a mix of nice traditional British town/village but still forward-thinking, some cultural diversity, alternative scene (like a kind of Brighton/Bristol vibe but without being a city?!).

We’d like a house big enough for family and friends to come and stay. Ideally 4 beds, so DDs can have a room each plus a spare. Plus a home office somewhere. Decent garden space. Nice kitchen/diner. Basically one step up from what we currently have now. Ideally this next house would be our “forever home” where we’d raise our girls and not have to think about moving again until they’d flown the nest and/or we are retiring.

If we tried to buy this house in one of the local more rural villages (Berkshire/North Hampshire) it would be about £800k which is just not in our budget. For complicated reasons we have peaked quite early in terms of our earning potentials and combined we wouldn’t expect to be earning substantially more than we are now for at least ten years (due to DH training and then I might also make a sideways move). So we need a cheaper area really. Ideally we would actually reduce our mortgage hence wanting to move at the end of the mortgage period so max. £400-450k budget ideally.

However we do need to be easy distance to universities for my job and to hospitals/universities for DH’s job. So that rules out very rural areas as we don’t want to take on massive commutes. We have family ties to Southampton/Bournemouth areas, Surrey and Herefordshire all of which seems to imply that we should find somewhere else in the south but we need to get away from London. So maybe SW (outskirts of exeter? Somerset?) or perhaps South Wales (look for jobs in Cardiff/Swansea?). But I also want to explore the option of Scotland, as Glasgow and Edinburgh have good rail and air links to the south but I just don’t know enough about the areas.

Well done if you got this far. Happy bank holiday!

OP posts:
Darkchocolateandcoffee · 30/08/2021 09:03

When you say you need to be within easy reach of universities, which ones do you mean? And if you mean any, how many?

For example your budget would work in Lincolnshire, but there aren't many unis there.

I think you prob need to narrow down your search area a bit first as currently you're looking in three countries!

bunnybuggs · 30/08/2021 09:04

I would rule out Herefordshire (Brighton vibe Shock) but I think you mean Hertfordshire which may be more appropriate.

I think you need to narrow down what is important/vital and what can be compromised on. You obviously could take on another doer-upper which would give you more leeway on price paid if the other things you consider important are there.
Herefordshire - vibrant Grin - I live here and I love it but I like a quiet life and hills.

WaterBottle123 · 30/08/2021 09:05

Your entire lives could have changed by 2025 including your jobs, who you're married to and the number of children you have!!!

happytoday73 · 30/08/2021 09:08

Wouldn't the timing be really bad for getting your youngest into reception? If moved as finished 5 year fixed would apply and start at one school then move so start again.

From a school perspective you would be better to pay fee and move year earlier so in new location in time to apply for reception place

BikeRunSki · 30/08/2021 09:08

Holmfirth, West Yorkshire
Market town
Lots of rural villages
Arty/liberal vibes
Access to Leeds, Sheffield, Manchester, Huddersfield, Barnsley and Oldham for hospitals; Universities in L,S,M and H.

Darkchocolateandcoffee · 30/08/2021 09:16

@bunnybuggs do you mean Herefordshire has Brighton vibes?

Please say no as I've always thought Herefordshire sounds lovely and I long to go there, but won't waste the trip if it's like Brighton (which I hate!)

MovingSchmoving · 30/08/2021 09:18

To answer questions:

Not having any more DCs
Not intending on getting divorced but who knows 😉
2025 will be a unique opportunity to move as we are stuck to our current area for the next 3 years due to DH work training. After that he will have to get a different role which will be summer/autumn 2025 and then probably not move jobs for another 3+ Years. So it feels like it would be a now or never thing. Not ideal timing for youngest but we could move into rented first if needed (summer 2025) to then start school in autumn and be looking at houses then too.
I did mean Herefordshire! It’s where I grew up. I like hills too 😃

OP posts:
MovingSchmoving · 30/08/2021 09:20

Also feel like I should clarify what I mean by “Brighton vibes” which I’m aware sounds a bit wanky. I’m a Green Party member, DD goes to a Montessori nursery, DH is a vegetarian. Still sounds wanky 😂 but I basically mean a bit crunchy.

OP posts:
MovingSchmoving · 30/08/2021 09:25

Also aware this is very advance planning but we are obviously at the very beginning stages of thinking about moving and want to make a shortlist of areas to scope out.

OP posts:
lljkk · 30/08/2021 09:30

Schools....
I would like OP to prioritise more in criteria, what features are essential, which ones are desirable, and which ones would be 'bonus'.

Remember to put down the negative things that are essential to avoid, too, don't assume others have same thresholds as you.

Terriah · 30/08/2021 09:32

Nottinghamshire / North Leicestershire might suit? Nottingham has a great nightlife scene & there's some fab schools Rushcliffe way.

Newpuppymummy · 30/08/2021 09:43

Durham fits all your criteria

bunnybuggs · 30/08/2021 09:47

Apologies OP - it often happens that a slip of the pen means people write Herefordshire when they mean vibrant, culturally diverse Hertfordshire.

Herefordshire is a lovely rural sleepy backwater that I hope will always stay that way.
But Green Party, Brighton vibes and Montessori nurseries - it is absolutely not. Vegetarians are fine, I am one and there is always lots of lovely fressh fruit and vegetables around that have not clocked up food miles.

BikeRunSki · 30/08/2021 09:53

You’ll get rural crunchy in Holmfirth, but not as intensely as Brighton. The nursery my friends with small dc go to is a forest school rather than Montessori though.

The areas around Hebden Bridge (between Leeds and Manchester) worth considering. Maybe York and Otley (n Leeds), but they may be too urban. Pocklington too, more rural, but easy access to York (uni, hospital), and further to Hull and Leeds. Unis and hospital and both cities.

MayContainNits · 30/08/2021 09:58

@bunnybuggs

Apologies OP - it often happens that a slip of the pen means people write Herefordshire when they mean vibrant, culturally diverse Hertfordshire. Herefordshire is a lovely rural sleepy backwater that I hope will always stay that way. But Green Party, Brighton vibes and Montessori nurseries - it is absolutely not. Vegetarians are fine, I am one and there is always lots of lovely fressh fruit and vegetables around that have not clocked up food miles.
Herefordshire does have one of the only state Steiner schools though, if that's your (hessian) bag.
bizboz · 30/08/2021 10:05

School application will be an issue as you have to apply by the previous January and you will need an in-year place for your older child. When you decide on a general area you will need to check out which schools have spaces to narrow down the search.

People often mention Stroud as having a Brighton-like vibe. Also Bristol?

Turquoisesea · 30/08/2021 10:12

Warwickshire is lovely, Stratford upon Avon / Warwick, close to motorways and obviously very central, but also lovely pretty towns with good schools. Not great nightlife but lots of restaurants / theatre etc. Lots of lovely villages nearby and the Cotswolds on your doorstep.

BikeRunSki · 30/08/2021 10:13

Lewes? I know it’s like 5 mins away from Brighton.

RandomMess · 30/08/2021 10:19

Bizarrely Lancaster but it's more of a decent town than a city. Large student population lots of vegan cafe, Green Party popular. Close to coast and country.

Uni and hospitals here plus at Preston or can travel to Manchester.

Good schools and lots of choice of 4 beds with that budget either in the expensive areas or out in the villages.

Decent bus services, and odd one - loads of allotments 🤷🏽‍♀️

Fubitch · 30/08/2021 10:21

Hebden Bridge, Lancaster, Shrewsbury, Malvern.

MovingSchmoving · 30/08/2021 10:25

Schools seem like a sticking point but I would like to - for now - make the assumption that it could be a hurdle but doable. People must move all the time with children who already are at school. I’m trying to look at the bigger picture of where we would like to base ourselves for the next 10-20+ years and jobs are probably more the deciding factor in terms of timing than schools (given that there are schools everywhere, although some are “better” than others). I am not that fussed about academics at primary schools in general - I want somewhere safe and supportive and friendly. Not fussed about results or whether it’s religious or how many kids go to grammar schools or how many extra mandarin lessons they do. I’m aware that sounds dismissive and i wouldn’t necessarily expect a Montessori/Steiner education but just think that most primary schools are fine and what you do with them outside of 9-3 matters just as much.

Definite NOs for us would be:
Areas that are a nightmare to get to from the rest of the country given that we have family and friends spread all over the place
Areas with high crime or big drugs issues
Places with a high proportion of UKIP voters (this is slightly tongue in cheek but you get where I’m going).

OP posts:
Roselilly36 · 30/08/2021 10:26

Norfolk or Suffolk, good value property, easy to get to the coast, lots of rural areas. Norwich, good, safe city.

MovingSchmoving · 30/08/2021 10:29

Random things I can think of that we would like to have within half an hour:
Independent shops
Library
Cafes
Theatre
Swimming pool
Squash courts for DH
Train station

Not fussed about night life, bars, restaurants etc really.

@RandomMess we nearly moved to Lancaster a few years ago pre-DC! But it didn’t work out with DHs job. Also slightly concerned at the distance from family although I know trains to Southampton aren’t too bad from there.

OP posts:
MovingSchmoving · 30/08/2021 10:34

I have thought about Stroud quite a lot but not sure if it would be a bad commute given that the nearest unis are Bath and Bristol and the trains aren’t great.

OP posts:
ZoBo123 · 30/08/2021 10:40

South Cambridgeshire? Or Cambridge itself. It is a city but lots of open space and rural areas not very far away.