How to fairly split cost of living with partner

[Handyrick]

Really need advice, this is a property and relationship dilemma, but trying to keep my finance hat on.

I have just discovered I am pregnant. I currently live in a flat and am in the process of buying a 3 bed house that needs about 80k of work. I am buying solo.

My DP currently rents and we don't live together. We will live together going forwards since we discovered I am pregnant.

We are both high earners, and combined have a total income in excess of 250k.

I am trying to decide what is best to do:

• abandon my purchase, and buy somewhere with him.
• continue with my purchase, let him move in and charge him rent.

I am inclined to go with the second option of continuing with my solo purchase and then in 2 years or so, look to buy with him. I'd personally bank all the proceeds of sale, and then contribute 50% deposit to any future purchase.

If I go with option 2, what is a fair way of splitting cost? I want to keep my financial independence and I also want to have my own personal emergency 'fund'. I was thinking of charging him below market 'rent', and then splitting all bills 50/50. I would personally take care of any capital expenditure on the house re improvements.

For context, the market rent for a 3 bed house in my area is £2.5k, so I would charge him £1k rent + bills.

Does this sound ok?

The house I am buying is fine for a small family, but I would want something bigger after the baby if we both continue with our careers.

I also like the idea of having my own asset in case things go wrong with the relationship and I need a place for my and child.

I think you are doing the right thing. You are at your most vulnerable, being pregnant, and not married. Buying your own home is sensible and you’ll know if your and DP are compatible and stable before you commit to buy somewhere together.

Haveing a baby is hard work, this is when you are both likely to struggle with the relationship.

I’d push ahead with the purchase and ask him to pay £1000 a month the same as he’s paying now with the added benefit of more room and less people! You could always save his share. Plus it would allow him time to save for when you are both ready to purchase a house together.

I was buying a house years ago when I met my BF and he then moved in. I didn't ask him to pay rent but we split the bills including the small mortgage. The house firmly remained in my name! Thank god - as we did split up.
Just ask him about what/how to split bills. But keep the house as yours. He can buy a place for rental if he wants? My ex spent all his free money on bikes, tattoos and being an all round twat. His choice that he had no savings.