So so stressed out ! :(

[yoyoman]

We are waiting for our mortage offer and I am losing sleep and hair because of it !

All checks have been done according to our broker.
They asked some additional questions - nothing too out there just about my partners employers and his residential status. We answered and it was all fine.

What are some reasons Mortgages are refused ?

I just cannot eat not sleep . Really didn't expect his to affect to such an extent ;(

Our brains are wired towards negativity bias. This means you're much more likely to imagine something bad will happen (like your mortgage will be refused) than that everything will go fine (mortgage will be approved).

If you sit and think "our mortgage might be refused" that will cause stress. If I imagine thinking that for myself I feel my heart pumping and shoulders getting tense. No wonder you can't sleep! But it's just a story your brain is spinning.

If you choose to think something like "we answered all questions and we're just waiting to hear back" then the feeling for me is totally different. It stops the brain spinning, stops the tension. Gets me to a neutral place.

So instead of fretting about why mortgages are refused, just sit with the thought that you've submitted all info and you're waiting for the answer. Stay in that neutral territory until you receive the response.

Hope this helps!

What a great post Anna

Thank you @AnnaCharles888
Such a lovely post and so greatly put.
You are completely right of course

@yoyoman
My pleasure. Looking forward to reading the post that says it was all approved!

And if it isn't, well you'll know the action you need to take next, without worry.

Win-win.

Yes the house buying stress is real!!

I'm currently trying to practice mindfulness and being rational, but still am not sleeping well and I'm surprised it's having this much of a negative physical effect on me.

You are not alone!

We had our mortgage offer through today - well an email from the broker saying so.

I had an inkling though for weeks it would be refused due to my frivolous spending through lockdown 🤣🤣

Whole process is anxiety ridden!