Mixed race family want to leave London.. :(

[Clebaby]

Hey! Please help if you can (but also please do not comment if you do not support anti-racism. Thank you!) We want to leave the rat race by buying a more rural/village/town outskirts house where mortgage repayments are way less so we can work less and be with our 2 young kids more. But outside of London we are so worried about racist attitudes. We’ve worked out a few areas that may be more diverse than others - like Leamington Spa - or places that may be white but more liberal and welcoming - like Stroud and Malvern. We have (white) family in the middle of these 3 places. Are we accurate in our assumptions? Is there anywhere else in midlands/cotswolds or even wales that would either be diverse or open minded and less racist? I spend so long looking up racist attacks on twitter every time we find a good place that I end up back at square one: London is the only safe ish place. But we don’t want to work 24/7 and never see our kids for the privilege. Over it. Maybe we have no choice but cities? :(

I'm white, but my husband is black and kids are mixed.

I grew up near Malvern and it's very white. It gets more diverse towards Worcester but it's still a very white area.

We now live near Cardiff and it's very diverse and a lovely place to live.

I was brought up in Stroud. It is very white. I suspect large parts of the town would be welcoming though. But it isn't multicultural.

Bristol is but I would still say there are areas that are predominately white. But it is a nice city and the schools would definitely be more mixed.

completely agree with @Proceedwithcare

Just to let you know there is a black mumsnetter section now. It is in 'Other'. I don't know your ethnic background but it might be worth posting there as well as there will be experiences of living around the U.K. as a black family.

Nottingham?

I wouldn't focus on racist attacks but on finding somewhere with a good mix of diversity. It is the ongoing grind of crass assumptions, petty prejudices and ignorant comments that makes life wearing in some non-diverse communities. I grew up in a rural area - it is still very unenlightened wrt awareness of diversity, though few people would openly admit they were racist (even if they are - they know it is not acceptable to mind their manners. Fair enough, none of us can police the thoughts of others, it is how the behave that counts)

Not exactly rural but it might be worth considering Milton Keynes? Many areas are very green with huge parks and off road cycle routes. It's more ethically diverse than the national average.

I'd avoid anywhere that's a long held Tory seat or places that voted for Brexit - this is not at all to say that all Tory or Brexit voters are racists, but there's a definite overlap.

In a thread about tolerant places to live someone has to come along and perpetuate a stereotype...

@lakeswimmer

I'd avoid anywhere that's a long held Tory seat or places that voted for Brexit - this is not at all to say that all Tory or Brexit voters are racists, but there's a definite overlap.

In a thread about tolerant places to live someone has to come along and perpetuate a stereotype...

Also its not always true that long held tory seats aren't diverse. My constituency, Finchley and Golders Green is incredibly diverse, 30% Jewish and also a variety of different ethnic and religious backgrounds. It was the constituency of Margaret Thatcher and has been held by the tories for 10 years. There is an assumption that BAME and other ethnic minorities would vote labour but i find that isn't actually true across the board, there are some groups that are actually more likely to vote tory.

OP didn't say she wanted a liberal place to live in, she wanted a diverse place. However diversity alone doesn't necessarily engender tolerance. Luton is pretty diverse with a huge ethnic population but it also produced Tommy Robinson. I find that the most comfortable places for ethnic minorities to live in are either the places with an established community (your own), a left leaning place like Brighton, a student town like Cambridge and Oxford or a fairly wealthy area with a large established professional population (who regularly work with people from all over the world). Thats why London is an ideal place for minorities because professionals are pretty much scattered everywhere.

I think a lot of villiage can be well to do and “clicky”close knit community. A close relative moved to a very posh villiage.... all was fine at first but then they had several issues. The person is still living their and has learnt to adjust. I personally would not want to live in a villiage and be the minority.

On paper places like Luton appear to be diverse... In reality, you have several mono-cultural ghettos existing in the same town.

And just LOL @ avoiding long held Tory seats. Take a look at the top 50 safest Tory seats, then the top 50 safest Labour, & tell me which you'd prefer to live in/raise a family in!: www.electoralcalculus.co.uk/orderedseats.html

OP - maybe look to somewhere wealthy professionals want to live. Surround yourself with educated, reasonable people & you will never encounter any issues. But dare I say it - I think you're worrying far too much. Despite what you read constantly on Twitter/ the Guardian, the UK is still on the whole an incredibly welcoming, tolerant place - even out in the sticks.

Are multicultural and "not racist" the same thing? Genuine question. We live in an affluent area of the Midlands and it is very, very white, but I would also say (I think?) that racism would be/is very much frowned on. Whereas my sister lives in zone 2 London with a hugely diverse population, and racism seems much more visible.

I appreciate that there are many forms of racism though and that being made to feel welcomed up to a point but that you don't quite fit in may be subtle but just as real.

@cheeseismydownfall a lot of areas in zone 2 have a huge problem with poverty and inequality. When you are constantly worrying about the next meal, you are more worried about resource scarcity and having a lot of people who you perceive as 'different and non-indigenous' is only going to heighten that anxiety. Minorities in affluent areas tend to be very well integrated (they have to be in good jobs to afford those areas in the first place) so the dominant group doesn't see them as a threat.

@mogtheexcellent

I live in a mid sized village outside of Reading next door to a lovely mixed race family. And there are more than a few at DDs school. No racist incidents as far as I am aware. Great schools, leisure centre and lots going on plus we are surrounded by fields and woodland. Pricey as M4 corridor but cheaper than London.

As an indicator, my 3 bed semi with huge garden is valued at 350k

Burghfield Common?

@cheeseismydownfall I think the idea is that in a place that is almost 100% white, people can get away with treating minorities badly as you are massively outnumbered. I posted earlier that a pub in amersham has refused to serve me. That really wouldn't have happened in London, as restaurants wouldn't want to alienate 40% of their customers.

I’m struggling with the Brexit and Tory link. My area voted for Brexit, the MP is Tory but actually mixed race, the area is very diverse and the local council has been run by Lib Dems for decades... Go figure.

Hi there. I’d be wary of parts of West Yorkshire. It is, as people rightly say, diverse. However, that doesn’t mean it’s free of racism. I’m originally from Huddersfield and I would say that there are huge problems there. Communities are on the whole segregated and mistrusting of one another. The town is divided into white, Muslim and black areas. There are exceptions to the rule but it’s not exactly communities living happily and harmoniously together. The Muslim and white divides have for example been intensified recently by high-profile media coverage of Asian grooming gangs and recent covid lockdowns together with the rise in populism and the far right. I live in London now and while it’s far from perfect it’s a world away from West Yorkshire. Maybe the big cities like Leeds are better but the smaller towns that have suffered immensely economically over the past 20-30 years are far from ideal.

@hopingforonlychild, yes I think that is spot on and exactly how my sister would describe it. It is certainly diverse but is extremely divided. You may well be right about monocultures - I would like to think that kind of racism wouldn't happen in our local towns, but I can't say it doesn't, I don't know.

Leicestershire, especially the larger villages are pretty diverse now, not like the city (which is 50/50) but I have several friends who are bame who live in villages.

@JoJoSM2 Tbh the brexit result was why I never looked into Sutton.

I am perfectly willing to live in a Tory area (tbh a lot of people i know in my area voted tory primarily cos of Israel, and while I don't really agree with such single issue voters, it at least has nothing much to do with UK politics and tbh I don't think my worldview is massively different from theirs).

But I really would not want to live in an area that voted for Brexit. Not because I think they are racist. I just don't think its so great that such a large percentage of the population has such a strikingly different worldview. And i don't think I would fit in very well. No idea why Sutton voted for Brexit. Is it because it has an older population?

I’d go for Bristol or Birmingham.

Op, Leicester is a great place. We are a mixed race family, and feel quite comfortable here. Our DD goes to a school that's so diverse, she has classmates from all corners of the world. We live in a mostly white area, but people are very nice.

www.storyofleicester.info/city-stories/a-city-of-diversity/
Leicester is very good for my racially and culturally diverse family.

@hoping4onlychild

I was rather surprised by the Brexit vote but then again it was v close. I wonder if what swayed it was the older population as we’ve got tons of retirement flats everywhere. But it’s mainly a family area as it’s properly mixed with people from different backgrounds living side by side. Our last neighbourly Christmas party was hosted by a Pakistani family.

[quote hoping4onlychild]@JoJoSM2 Tbh the brexit result was why I never looked into Sutton.

I am perfectly willing to live in a Tory area (tbh a lot of people i know in my area voted tory primarily cos of Israel, and while I don't really agree with such single issue voters, it at least has nothing much to do with UK politics and tbh I don't think my worldview is massively different from theirs).

But I really would not want to live in an area that voted for Brexit. Not because I think they are racist. I just don't think its so great that such a large percentage of the population has such a strikingly different worldview. And i don't think I would fit in very well. No idea why Sutton voted for Brexit. Is it because it has an older population?[/quote]
I'm not sure that lots of people on either side of the "brexit divide" do have very different world views. When you believe this you help perpetuate the myth.

When asked a binary question people have to go for either yes or no. However some of those people will have been 45% in favour of leaving the EU and 55% in favour of remaining (remain vote) and others will be have been 55% in favour of leaving and 45% in favour of leaving (leave vote). They may actually be very close together on all sorts of political issues. Please stop making assumptions about people's opinions - it's not helpful.

I live in a rural area which is very white but also generally liberal. There are other places like that too - Hebden Bridge and Totnes spring to mind.

This is all sooooo useful to me! I’ve been reading mumsnet threads Looking for these answers for so long but never thought about posting the exact Question myself !

When I imagine my family in the future I feel safest thinking about them living in an area that voted remain and that is quite liberal and creative -because that will be a generally friendlier place, IMO.. as well as more welcoming to us. And more fun! The Leave people I know are so angry and moany.

So far Leamington or Birmingham outskirts is winning.. will check Bedfordshire more. would love to be in Cardiff or up north but gettin too far from family probably. Just got to sell up in London before everything crashes.. :S