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Buyers remorse...tell me it's normal

240 replies

DavetheCat2001 · 02/06/2019 18:47

I've been reading back on old threads about this, it does seem to be 'a thing', but I am slightly freaking out about us moving into our new house this coming Friday.

Canned version of events: it has taken over 4 months to get here, lost a set of buyers on our place, lost a solicitor along the way, had financial issues etc..won't go into detail as not really relevant, but we REALLY wanted this house and finally exchanged last week.

Went in there yesterday morning with the kids to measure the windows for blinds, and as soon as I walked in it felt cold, dark and gloomy. It's Edwardian, and it's been empty for over a year and not loved, it's a project house and in my head could be beautiful but the truth is we are stretching ourselves to our absolute limit financially, and will have nothing left over after completion.

OH is going to do a lot of work himself (when he can fit it in working FT), and we save for things as we go.

It was such a beautiful sunny day yesterday, but walking in there was like going into a musty cave. Both DC's were bickering and youngest had a meltdown when she saw the room we were thinking of for her..stomped around the house on raw floorboards making a racket and saying she hated it etc..

OH and I have been bickering too..think the stress has got to us, and best of all it appears that the vendor has for some reason since the last time we saw the house (mid April) ripped down the fusebox in the hallway, leaving us with no working plug sockets in the house???!!?

We couldn't test the grotty oven that is being left and so as it stands we move in on Friday into a house we cannot plug in our fridge/cook anything/heat etc...fucking nightmare.

Obviously we raised this with the EA on Saturday, but in his typical fashion he never came back to us despite saying he was going to contact the vendor immediately to find out what he is doing.

So tomorrow morning we get onto our solicitor to let them know...vendor has to make good and I have said there is no way I am moving into that house on Friday with my kids if no electricity, FFS.

That would put us in breach of contract with our buyers I'm guessing, so the whole thing is a nightmare.

Came back to our light, bright flat yesterday and just wanted to cry. Been here 14 years, had my kids here and made this place lovely.

I don't want to go..what were we thinking??? We need more space for sure with 2 growing DC's (5 and 8), and I thought I loved the house but I don't think I do anymore. Rang my mum for advice and wise words and she said I was the same when I bought our current flat as it was a state too, and I apparently spent many weekends back at her house as didn't want to be here either!

Can anyone please just bring me down and reassure me that this will pass and it will all be ok?

Packers come in on Thursday to pack us up, and we have a cleaning co booked to go into the house on Thursday too to deep clean it as it is minging....obviously they cannot do this if no bloody power in the house!!

Auuugh..just want to crawl under my duvet and it all to go away.

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ravenshope · 14/06/2019 20:22

Lovely to hear you're feeling more at home. Rosie the cat clearly is too!

LarryGreysonsDoor · 14/06/2019 20:30

Home is where the cat is.

It looks lovely.

DavetheCat2001 · 14/06/2019 21:09

@TiddleTaddleTat how exciting! Sounds like you guys have really got stuck in..I think once you actually start getting on with it, the house begins to feel more like your own. We've hopefully found a builder who is going to sort out the front 2 reception rooms for us/sand the floorboards/ open up a doorway between the two so we can have one room that is 'finished'..good luck with your project.

@LarryGreysonsDoor I LOVE your username!! Made me and OH chuckle!

Thanks @ravenshope..definitely helps having Rosie back in the pad..she actually seems to have calmed right down in the last day or so, still clamouring to go outside but won't be allowed for at least another week. She seems quite happy on the sofa though Grin

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DavetheCat2001 · 14/06/2019 21:11

😻

Buyers remorse...tell me it's normal
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DavetheCat2001 · 18/06/2019 09:17

House update: scaffolding going up this morning in preperation to fix our leaky roof and remove a chimney stack that is sitting at a precarious angle!

Not 'asthetic' work, but first step in the process making a much neglected house water tight!

Buyers remorse...tell me it's normal
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userxx · 18/06/2019 12:36

And with the amount of water at the moment it needs to be!

Neet90 · 24/06/2019 02:05

Just read through your whole thread, thanks for sharing.

DavetheCat2001 · 29/06/2019 19:50

Hello! Beautiful day here in London today.. first paddling pool day in the new place ❤️

Buyers remorse...tell me it's normal
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dontcallmelen · 30/06/2019 17:28

@DavetheCat2001 great progress already👍🏼

QueenofPain · 30/06/2019 17:35

I wonder if this fuse box problem is going to end up being one of those things where an electrician is going to refuse to work on the electrics without a full rewrite due to the age of the electrics? You need to find that out rapidly so that you can get appropriate recompense from the seller.

What an odd thing to have done?!

I don’t know if it might help you feel a little more positive about things but I follow a YouTuber who posts monthly renovation vlogs of her house whilst both of them still working, and although it’s a big job, you can already see what a beautiful house it’s going to be. Her name is Laura Melhuish Sprague if you fancied a look, she’s very, very middle class and twee but clearly not afraid to get her hands dirty.

QueenofPain · 30/06/2019 17:44

Didn’t RTFT before posting. The youtuber that I mentioned is still relevant though.

Maranello · 30/06/2019 18:21

As we're about to embark on a move, it's so nice to see how you're settling in @DavetheCat2001! Can I be cheeky and ask where you got your lovely cupboard/dresser in the photo above?

Buyers remorse...tell me it's normal
LittleRen · 30/06/2019 18:44

I cried the night we moved and wondered what we had done. We left a beautiful Victorian semi to an equally beautiful 1930s detached. It seemed anything but beautiful on move day.

It wasn’t meant to be a project house but in three months we have done so much and it has been amazing starting from scratch. We are currently in the middle of kitchen Reno with no end in sight and I have thought bring back the old house. It’s normal. My dad described it as the low point as I was crying in his arms on moving night, it gets better from there - there is always a low point, for you it seems to be now. Think long term - your lovely new house which you can make your own.

JoJoSM2 · 30/06/2019 19:47

Are you feeling at home yet, OP?

DavetheCat2001 · 30/06/2019 20:58

Hello!!!

Thanks for the link @QueenofPain..I'll def check it out. Love a reno-blog!

@Maranello I bought the cabinet from a little second hand shop near where I live.

@JoJoSM2 - it's getting better. I still have moments where I shudder at the sheer scale of the work we have to do, and certain bits I hate..like the yucky bathroom that leaks water everywhere when you have a shower and it's mouldy tiles, and the upstairs loo that has no water currently that smells like a public toilet..PITA having to go up and downstairs in the night for a pee, but first world problems and all that!

We've been working hard in the garden today. It has been SO neglected. Have dug up all sorts of weird and wonderful things! We were going to pay a friend of a friend to dig it over/turf/dig a couple of new beds but with the estimate coming in at £4k, we have decided to have a crack at it ourselves.

Feeling happier that it is looking more like a garden than a wasteland, still lots of work to do though! My hands and back are aching from weeding/digging!

Also have had a guy here painting the render on the outside of the house to freshen it up a bit. He is also repainting our front door, which he has made a start on. can't wait for that to be done, it'll make such a difference.

I think for me, it's making little changes that makes it feel like our house rather than someone else's run down, unloved wreck!

It's going to take a lot of time, money and patience..and hard work, but we're not afraid to get stuck in..did it before with our lovely maisonette.

Pics of the garden before and after!

Buyers remorse...tell me it's normal
Buyers remorse...tell me it's normal
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dontcallmelen · 30/06/2019 22:15

Dave yeahy the garden looks heaps better already 😍 painting the outside & front door will make a huge difference as well.

Maranello · 01/07/2019 18:34

I bought the cabinet from a little second hand shop near where I live.

Lucky find! It suits the house perfectly.

ravenshope · 01/07/2019 18:53

Fantastic job on the garden!
Has your buyer's remorse left you now?

DavetheCat2001 · 01/07/2019 19:41

It's definitely better than it was, although I hate the dusty floorboards and the fact there is no water upstairs.

Our current bathroom is functional but pretty minging.

Looking forward to hopefully getting the front room knocked through and sorted soon.

Will post before and after pics 😊

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ravenshope · 01/07/2019 21:02

Glad it's improving, I hate dust too but think how far you've come in such a short time!
I'm moving in August and the bathroom would make half the members of mumsnet faint! But it's perfectly serviceable and will do for me (though I will remove the floral carpet asap)

DavetheCat2001 · 01/07/2019 21:59

Exciting @ravenshope!

How are you feeling about it?

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ravenshope · 02/07/2019 09:01

Incredibly excited. It's my first ever owned home and I'm not young. The hardest thing is the impatience, I just want to move now. The cost of putting up a fence to keep the dog in and of removal van will wipe out all my savings so will be stuck with the amazing floral carpets for a while!
Although there are self-adhesive vinyl planks in b and M I'm considering...

Sparadrap · 02/07/2019 09:18

Your house looks beautiful already!

We moved from a small but beautifully done up house in London to a huge wreck by the sea. Our removal men even said we can’t believe you have moved from that to this, and not in a good way Confused

I cried lots about it (blame the new baby) and was so homesick for ages. We slowly have done it up into a stunner of a place. It all takes time (and money) but I think you become far more attached to a house you have brought back to life than moving into a perfect already home.

DavetheCat2001 · 02/07/2019 09:30

@Sparadrap your house sounds amazing! I totally agree that the more work you put in, the more 'yours' it becomes.

The thought of ripping out a 'nice' kitchen or bathroom that isn't to your taste isn't attractive! This house is so basic, it functions but I'll have no qualms about ripping stuff out as and when!

@ravenshope I hear you re the finances! The roof work and getting the plumbing/central heating/ new boiler work is going to wipe us out. It's going to be a long time till we can afford to do anything else! The 'pretty' stuff will have to wait!

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ravenshope · 02/07/2019 10:55

@Sparadrap I'm moving by the sea too!
@DavetheCat2001it's annoying isn't it, 'wasting' all your money on the boring stuff?!

I've been waiting for this move for a year, so planned all the redecoration, will just take a few years to be able to do it. :-)

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