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Original poster

my husband loves one house, me the other.

153 replies

SeasonalVag · 15/11/2015 16:41

After six months of intensive house hunting, I fell on love with one house, my husband with another. Each house is similar to our respective childhood homes, so one is a 1930s detached, the other 1970s.

Based on location, we chose my husbands favourite...it's significantly nearer my son's school, but I'm so disappointed and upset, I've actually taken to my bed to get my head around this house which is nice enough but my one stab of buying a house and really loved the other one.

Is it normal to feel so upset....I just wanted a house I loved and would be disappointed if my husband was this childish.
Secretly I'm hoping the offer gets rejected

OP posts:
MrsFlorrick · 16/11/2015 12:43

It's hard when you don't agree on the big things.

From an outsiders perspective, they both have potential. However the 30s house looks in better nick. And it's has a much bigger plot! The 70s house is very overlooked with a very shallow garden.

And if the 30s house is in the better location,
Then that makes more sense.

Not what you want to hear. I can't help with the emotional side.

I would say this, if you can't agree, don't buy either. Wait and you will find something you both love. Smile

Woodenheart101 · 16/11/2015 12:44

I would view back to back and then do a pro/con list- if neither of you want to budge then I would carry on looking as one of you is always going to resent the house.

IShouldBeSoLurky · 16/11/2015 12:48

I'm another who agrees with you - the 1930s house is absolutely and the other one is... not.

TonyMaguire · 16/11/2015 12:56

The only thing I like about the 70s one are the fabulous stairs.

Original poster
SeasonalVag · 16/11/2015 13:33

30 needs bathroom (subtly grotty)
70 needs kitchen

I know we can do some great minimalistic furnishing on 70....club chairs, bit of g_plan ... But we're private people and I would always feel overlooked.

But thirty has a foundation stone with 1930 carved into it swoon
as well as being on huge plot near library fields gym....
But
4miles
From
My
Son's
School

OP posts:
Original poster
SeasonalVag · 16/11/2015 13:35

I'm going to screen shot the plaots and email them to husband

30k is a big difference in price for a much smaller house

OP posts:
SwedishEdith · 16/11/2015 14:02

This is the 1930s one? Very nice. But the rooms look/are smaller and I don't like the little steps to the front door - deathtrap when icy.

PrimalLass · 16/11/2015 14:18

What would put me off is having the conservatory across the back of the house. It makes me feel claustrophobic.

longestlurkerever · 16/11/2015 15:01

Would you definitely not change ds's school? I know plenty of people have no choice but a long school run but that could become a real pita and means he'll always be reliant on you.

Duckdeamon · 16/11/2015 15:37

4 miles from school is far.

TreadSoftlyOnMyDreams · 16/11/2015 15:54

The 1930's one has a v large mature garden lots of leaf picking and grass cutting Is that what's putting him off ?

4 miles from school - you don't say if he's primary or secondary age but while it's perfectly doable, it's a bit of a ball ache. Cycling home on dark, wet winter evenings after games, etc

I like the 1930's one I like best I think though I agree it's very fussy and I have never seen someone fill a bath with bubbles for pics!. It's vast [another London resident] but a central location with kids is sooo handy. And sociable for them so the 70's house is a more practical choice unless professional chauffeur is your preferred form of activity.

LucyLocketLostHerPocket · 16/11/2015 16:06

I've just found this thread and had a peek at the two houses. I have teenage DC and completely get the practicality of the 70s house but for me as a home the 1930s house wins hands down for the views and garden and the sheer loveliness of it. I have a modern house in a convenient location but would move in a heartbeat for a house like that if I could persuade DH.

longestlurkerever · 16/11/2015 16:15

The thing is obviously we are all going to like the 1930s one best as in the photos it's prettier, but your dh and you have a better sense of the compromise on location. How likely is it that you'll find a house you love in your ideal location? Is it settling for this 1970s house that's making you cry or letting go of this particular 1930s one? If the former, don't buy it. If the latter, that's more complicated,it could be right house wrong location and that's a expensive mistake to make.

Original poster
SeasonalVag · 16/11/2015 16:21

I would gladly drive them everywhere!! I do currently as they are 6 and 3 so I have years ahead of ferrying about. and we live about two mins from that house already so the drive feels ok, we're used to it. The other house is about as close as we could get to the school but still 2 miles so driving him about is unavoidable anyway....plus there's a rural style shuttlebus between the two towns..

His would-be secondary school is near the 1930s one, a five minute walk if that. So by the time he needs independence he'll have it.

OP posts:
longestlurkerever · 16/11/2015 16:22

Ok you've sold me! Wink

Original poster
SeasonalVag · 16/11/2015 16:25

Wouldn't your kids rather live near the sea, the library, a proper town, station, gym and opposite six acres of fields rather than the burbs? congested town, no station?

I'm going to fight him on this actually, as teenagers they would benefit so much more from my one....I didn't think about the bigger picture til now.

OP posts:
Hullygully · 16/11/2015 16:29

Yours.

No question.

poocatcherchampion · 16/11/2015 16:31

I prefer the 70s house. Way more potential. I never thought I would say that.

Those of you who hate the stairs what would you replace them with?
(I'm thinking about having some put in)

ClashCityRocker · 16/11/2015 16:34

Your house is so much nicer and if they are going to be going to secondary school nearby, it would make sense.

The seventies house could be great, but it's always going to be suburban.

longestlurkerever · 16/11/2015 16:35

The sea? Now you're talking. I couldn't tell which house you were talking about when you said ugh burbs. I thought it was dh who had location I'm his favour. Yours is probably the better investment if that helps your argument. you can see that from this thread. The market is much bigger for the 1930s one (though personally I like both)

SwedishEdith · 16/11/2015 16:39

Oh, if your has all the location points in its favour then choose that one - no contest. Still think you should look for another one that you both like.

SwedishEdith · 16/11/2015 16:43

This one?

SwedishEdith · 16/11/2015 16:45

This one just for the bathroom!

Whathaveilost · 16/11/2015 16:49

Those of you who hate the stairs what would you replace them with?
(I'm thinking about having some put in)

I have. nevileJohnson glass bannister fitted. It looks great and it would suit the 70s house.

Original poster
SeasonalVag · 16/11/2015 16:54

Yes, I think we'll have to keep going too. The other two houses in our shortlist went under offer today, so we'll have to decide what we're doing.

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