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Original poster

my husband loves one house, me the other.

153 replies

SeasonalVag · 15/11/2015 16:41

After six months of intensive house hunting, I fell on love with one house, my husband with another. Each house is similar to our respective childhood homes, so one is a 1930s detached, the other 1970s.

Based on location, we chose my husbands favourite...it's significantly nearer my son's school, but I'm so disappointed and upset, I've actually taken to my bed to get my head around this house which is nice enough but my one stab of buying a house and really loved the other one.

Is it normal to feel so upset....I just wanted a house I loved and would be disappointed if my husband was this childish.
Secretly I'm hoping the offer gets rejected

OP posts:
Tiredemma · 16/11/2015 09:00

I love the 30's house

howtorebuild · 16/11/2015 09:01

Has your dh though of the costs for, window dressing, decorating, new flooding, new stairs, new kitchen and sort out the living room arch?

potap123 · 16/11/2015 09:15

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Jux · 16/11/2015 09:20

I usually like the quirks in old houses. Grew up in a Victorian, currently live in a Georgian. The youngest I would normally go is 30s, but of your two, I would prefer to be inside the 70s house.

Think about the shape of the rooms.
Look at where the shadows fall.
Think about the maintenance of the garden.
Where are the shops, restaurants etc?
Busy roads, green spaces.

I think you would each come to love the house you end up living in, whether you fell in love at first sight or experienced a slow burn.

gamerchick · 16/11/2015 09:29

They both have their flaws, I do like your choice but that back garden will be a nightmare to maintain unless you get a dude in. Those stairs are proper fugly (and dangerous!) in the one your husband likes.

Personally I would be telling him no and carry on looking until you find a house you both love. Either way you'll lose your choice but better that than go into one you hate.

Original poster
SeasonalVag · 16/11/2015 09:31

Yeah, its not going to massively upset me as I can see the layout is much lighter and brighter in the 70s....I used to long to live on a quiet estate growing up but we were Marooned on quite a busy road.

What's put him off the thirties one is its too cluttered, needs a new bathroom. But he's crazy....there's a fully boarded carpeted and windowed loft which cannot be advertised as there are no stairs, but bang on some stairs and we've got five. Bedrooms....the garden is not overlooked at all....the views are fields not other houses.....the list is endless.

Don't know if its better to have a house were both a bit meh about or one that st least one of us adores.....we're easygoing by nature and tend to put eachother first so whoever house we end up on will be ok.

I love the way you've all guessed correctly that mine was the thirties one!!

OP posts:
Original poster
SeasonalVag · 16/11/2015 09:32

Also .Mine is 30k cheaper....because they'll move on price quite easily where as the other one has just been reduced from 550

OP posts:
TondelayaDellaVentamiglia · 16/11/2015 09:38

the older house is much more homely!

the new one is just boxy...a bit box, but not a nice box! And it looks very open plan....that great archway, and the horrible stairs, and it is close to the road

the older one has much more potential, and a proper front garden/driveway.

y0rkier0se · 16/11/2015 09:42

Yours is beautiful. I couldn't leave the chance of that house to live in the first. Sorry OP that doesn't help Blush

SoupDragon · 16/11/2015 09:51

What's put him off the thirties one is its too cluttered, needs a new bathroom

Clutter will go with the current owners and the house he likes is not without its faults with regard to needed decoration/refurbishment.

SoupDragon · 16/11/2015 09:55

Why does the 30s one need a new bathroom?

longestlurkerever · 16/11/2015 09:57

Going against the grain here but I don't love the 1930s one on the inside. The outside is gorgeous but the ceilings look very low in the sitting room and the eaves bedroom. The 1970s one has more light. Your dh is totally wrong about the respective work needed though. (Am in London so mainly just agog at the vastness of each house in reality- shameless property porn!)

TattieHowkerz · 16/11/2015 09:57

I do like your choice a lot more.

But most if what is unlikeable about the 70s house is the decor and the kitchen. Redecorated with nice furniture and fittings, it could be lovely. The proportions are great.

SoupDragon · 16/11/2015 09:59

the ceilings look very low in the sitting room

Do they? They look the same as mine, about 8 1/2 ft

SoupDragon · 16/11/2015 10:00

The 70s ceilings look about 7.5ft (a foot higher than a standard door)

RoseDawson · 16/11/2015 10:01

Your one is much nicer. Your DH must be blind!!!

longestlurkerever · 16/11/2015 10:07

Sorry, ignore me. I was looking at LEM's link. Is the op's one in West Kirkby? I can't click on her link but think I found it. I love the garden. Can't get past the fussy decor and pvc windows but it is a good house. I'm not sure it's so much better than the 1970s one but I would definitely want to be redecorating the 1970s one which would take it over budget probably

OTheHugeManatee · 16/11/2015 10:23

I like the 1930s one better. The 1970s one says 'successful vacuum cleaner salesman' to me Grin

Jibberjabberjooo · 16/11/2015 10:32

I like the 30s one better.

We bought a 60s house it was tired and isn't too attractive on the outside but we gutted it and started again and now it's wonderful. Houses are what you make them. And I don't spend a long time looking at the outside of my house as I'm in it.

FloweryPowery · 16/11/2015 11:02

I like the 70s one, so much space and it looks so bright. Replacing the bannisters would lift it a lot.

But then our current house is a 'box ticker' rather than a 'falling in love with' type of house. DH loved it, I thought it was meh but I could see it gave us everything on our list. It was difficult at first, especially paying so much for something I didn't love (and yes, totally first world problem) but it's grown on me hugely. Getting a wood burner helped. I think the falling in love thing is a bit of a luxury and not the norm. It's a house, a machine for living in, and ours does its job very well.

Is this really about the fact that you're not earning? If so, address it now or it will fester. It wasn't that at all in our case - I could see how practical his choice was. Even though I'd have preferred a smaller, better located, prettier house, I could see that his choice was the better one for the whole family (and a much better investment). And FWIW I defintely don't regret buying our box ticker house.

Duckdeamon · 16/11/2015 11:35

Suggest doing some rough estimates on (1) essential work and (2) "nice to do" work (eg your H would like a different bathroom in the 30s house). Does that change the price comparison?

Proximity to schools/transport etc is pretty important if you're hoping to stay many years.

wowfudge · 16/11/2015 11:36

The 30s detached is beautiful. It doesn't need a new bathroom - it doesn't need anything apart from the clutter and ott window dressings paring back. If I were spending that money, that's what I'd buy.

WingsClipped · 16/11/2015 12:05

Your house is sooooooo much nicer. Your DH's choice is fugly.

DrGoogleWillSeeYouNow · 16/11/2015 12:10

Location, location, location. Your husband has picked the right house, sorry!

Sallyhasleftthebuilding · 16/11/2015 12:36

You need to view back to back. Get a real sense of the differences.or keep looking.