Comfortable income for family of 3 to afford private school for 1 child (mortgage 1282)

[Private2025]

Dh is set on sending our child to a private school. We live near an excellent state primary school and it is a faith school (we belong to that faith) but given the current political situation around gaza and antisemitism, we have some concerns (dont really want to get into it here). We are sending our son to the affiliated nursery so will see how it goes. The only schools better than this faith school are either CofE schools in places like Hampstead or prep schools.

We own a small 2 bed flat in London zone 3 bought in our 20s, mortgage 1282. Service charge 160, council tax 150, gas and electricity 85. Not planning to upgrade cos mortgage rates not likely to go down and what we can get for our money isn't much in London plus would prioritize school fees.

Planning only on one child (dh got a vasectomy). We have 4 more years till reception so would like to plan ahead.

If our combined nett income was 7400 to 8000 would that be enough for a 24k to 30k per annum school fees, assuming school fee inflation. We would also like overseas holidays twice a year but don't mind staying at Premier inn/ibis type hotels.

We have a similar income, and similar mortgage and certainly couldn’t afford it. I think the only way to find out if YOU can do it is to save the equivalent amount for two years, and then you’ll know. Even if you think you’ll be struggling you’ll have the savings, so it’s a win, win situation.

What was the gap like for you personally. Did you also have one child.

Our family did this when our net income was just around the same, with a much bigger mortgage. But then that was early years in junior school and when the fees were only like 5k a term. It was very tight but luckily our income gradually caught up and right now even with the VAT and going onto senior school we're still okay but not with loads leftover. Our experience was positive, it was all very much worth it so it really depends on your view on education. If I had to choose, I would rather give my child a well balanced, rounded education than an apartment later on.

I think the uk economy is headed for japanification with irreversible collapse in the birth rate (and also collapses in birth rate in many developing countries so not many new immigrants). So house prices aren't likely to rise long term. In fact they will probably fall with the reversal of globalisation.

Due to the VAT rises, 7+ won’t be as competitive as it has been in the past and has never been as competitive as the 11+.

You’ll be fine if only considering private primary. Tight for private secondary, especially they are likely to be a lot more expensive when your DC goes.

We have 2 dcs in a London prep and I'd guess that quite a few families in your income bracket are managing to send one dc to our school (similar level of fees). I don't know the ins and outs of their mortgage payments etc but they have a similar income and are in same size properties. I think it would be fine although you'd be amongst the lowest earners (lots of families at our school have 2 parents both working in IB, partners in law firms or entertainment). In our school it's normal and seen as 'green' to buy secondhand uniform, and they dont charge extra for trips and lunches. So extras aren't much more (we pay for 3 enrichment clubs but it's optional and would be fine not to do any).

People always say that you need a enormous salary but we have managed on 3500 monthly income with 15 k school fees (although only 500 mortgage). It has been very, very tight though - VAT nearly pushed us over the edge. I know fees will be rising but my husband has finally finished his degree and will start earning in the next few weeks - we couldn't have carried on like this for much longer. I have literally budgeted every penny, one week caravan holiday in UK only for holidays.

But against that backdrop you have £800 more mortgage than us and potentially higher school fees but £4000 more income and some years to save. Of course it is doable if you want to, but you need to be honest with yourself about whether you are prepared to sacrifice other things if needed.

Honestly I think you could afford it.
I pay for fees but no longer think it is actually worth the high cost. Also extras aren’t usually that high in pre-prep and prep. Mumsnet always spouts it being high but is very dependent on school. My extras on school fees are about £300 a term, which includes the odd bit of uniform and a few trips. They become higher in secondary.

Personally I’d go state until end of Year 2, but if enjoying the experience change in Year 6. I wouldn’t mind a faith-based school for primary but think it becomes too insular for secondary.

I’m in the North, net income of £8,800, mortgage of £1,250 and a we could not comfortably afford private school fees.

We could budget for it but the wider compromises it would mean to our lifestyle would make this untenable.

Do you both have cars? We don't have one. We like travel but aren't interested in luxury holidays, would go to Asia to visit family occasionally and also to European countries and stay at budget hotels.

Yes, one petrol, one electric. Both owned outright so no monthly car payment. We pay £150 per month for gas and electric including all of the car charging, £50 a month (if that) on petrol and maybe £1,000 a year (tops) on insurance and other maintenance. Getting rid of the cars wouldn’t mean we could afford private school.

We do have big holiday and house spend a though each year (probably a combined £10k) which could be repurposed into school fees, and we could reduce savings and pension contributions - but these would have a long term impact on our financial wellbeing that we are not willing to compromise on.

You are panicking because you are new parents. It is impossible to know what school will suit your baby - you can only focus on what school will suit you.
If you want highly academic then pop him in somewhere like Highgate or UCS at 4 but please don't kid yourself that privates are nurturing.

The intense pressure will be off at 11+ somewhere like Highgate but the jump to secondary is huge and sometimes those children would have been better served by sitting the 11+ exam and having choice to go elsewhere. Also 11+ from state doesn't have to be that stressful - depends on the parents - as literally no child at state school will be talking about it.

£500 per month won't be enough for extras. Count on that much for clubs (if you want several sports, music lessons and after school clubs) - many of which will be external as 'teacher led' clubs are never as good as the clubs you find in the community. On top of that you have school lunches, uniforms, trips, exam fees etc, all of which will be much more expensive than state options.

Focus on pre-school and primary at this point. Yes, keep an eye on secondary but don't kid yourself that the school will get you there - you will need to tutor from year 4 at the latest. What you want is a safe, friendly primary with decent results (you will get much better results because you will tutor). Good state schools can be just as good at privates - especially when parents support their child.

Finally enjoy your child - especially if you are only having 1. Watch them develop and they will show you who they are and what they need and shower them with love and kisses. Also be mindful of the pressure you will be putting on him by watching every penny, living in a small flat just so you can chase a private education. That is a hell of a lot of pressure and responsibility on his shoulders for his whole life.

Tbh since then I have gone for a tour of the best state school in my area and it really isnt for us. And it is top 15 in the country results wise.. even the less optimal prep school we visited was better. I don't really want to go into detail abou why cos I do believe the school does try its best, it's just under- resourced and the kids are lovely and so are the parents.

It's similar to the nhs I suppose, I wish we didn't use private healthcare but we do for the most part.

Also re the small flat, I bought the small flat when I thought we would go to state school all the way. It's in catchment for Archer. A lot can change until then obviously but for now we are in catchment for Archer. I think the only comprehensive better than that in nw london for boys is APS. The catchment is tiny too so would be risky to move.

Are you talking about primary or are you visiting secondary? I would say that for primary the school really doesn’t need the same resources as a secondary. A lot is marketing and little to do with teaching or results. I’d pick a primary school with lovely kids and parents over a flashy school any day. Don’t fixate on league positions. They tell you next to nothing about the day-to-day. Also rolls are down so you can probably apply to quite a few primary schools that are a bit further away - all schools are different and I can assure you most good state ones are better than a less than optimal prep.
i have private health but the waits can still be weeks or a month or more to see a consultant. Recently had NHS referrals - super speedy for urgent ones, a bit of a wait for non urgent, have been find. Both have their pros and cons.

So far my favourite so far surprisingly was hendon prep.

We have a similar income to you, slightly more. Mortgage is the same and we have one child at private prep which currently costs about £13k a year. We manage fine.
when he moves up to the next school next year it will cost us double, but we will have almost paid off our mortgage.
Im feeling a bit twitchy about it, but we can manage.

The issue for you is that those fees are just for the prep primary years. God knows how much it will be by the time you get to secondary.

so I’d say primary you’ll be fine on that income. Secondary probably not.

Sorry I haven’t read the full thread so others may have said the same, but I wanted to add my tuppence. We are coming to the end of our DC private schooling and have stayed with it despite VAT. We were very naive at the start and thought it wld be easily affordable even if fees doubled (ha ha!). Both state educated ourselves and didn’t want to move to where there were “naice” schools - as all our wiser friends did - so thought we would stay in our lovely house and area and pay for private.

I wouldn’t do it again. Our DC have had a great education and experience but it really is too expensive and the prejudice against you and your off-spring is extraordinary (especially from those same people who bought £ houses next door to “naice” state schools).

We currently have 1 DC left in 6th form (fees get more expensive as you go up the school and often the better the school the higher the fees. That’s one of the tricky decisions at 11+ - a £2k annual difference has become a £10k annual difference.)

And our household income is just below £200k with no mortgage, a 10 year old car and 1 foreign holiday a year. Life with children in London is expensive even without school fees - extra curriculars, holiday camps, kit, clothes (!). We are objectively “rich”, but don’t feel it and don’t have the spare cash you would expect for our own treats like the ones you list.

State schools in London have improved massively and if you do your research carefully you will find good and excellent state options for your child. You may well need to move but in the long run it will be better. And you will have plenty of £ to supplement the odd weak teacher with extra tuition and to provide extra curricular activities not provided in school (although if you choose wisely these may also be offered in school).

At some point, as you get to know your child, it may turn out that because of their character or needs or some other reason, a large state school doesn’t suit them and you may feel a smaller, nurturing private school would be better. Perhaps put aside some money for this just in case. But, honestly, I would at least start with state school.

I live near good state schools.. even without the faith aspect (belong to a religion which allows me access to a state school that is better than brookland) .. i am in catchment for Brookland and archer academy and maybe fortismere since their catchment has expanded. Maybe Richmond would be better but from a north London perspective I am not sure how it gets better than that. Perhaps individual primary schools may be better but as a whole where I live has good primary and secondary school. I planned it this way when I bought at 26 hence why I live in a tiny 2 bed flat cos it was the only flat which fell in catchment for all the target schools while still being cheap enough that I could conceivably afford private when earnings improved. For private looking at hendon prep. Secondary not sure, will also have access to faith school plus archer in addition to private school. As the faith school at secondary level is a lottery, I am loathe to move as I want archer as a back up and moving to alexandra park for aps would be too far from hendon prep if we go private.. I would always make sure I am in catchment for good state schools just in case. I couldn't deal with the insecurity otherwise.

Yet I really don't think at least at the primary level they are what I am looking for.

Just checked in catchment for fortismere.. I doubt birth rates will be increasing in the next 10 years. Royal free Just closed its maternity unit cos north London birth rates have crashed.

When we bought our flat 6 years ago, all I was looking at was whether it had 2 bedrooms, was in catchment for the best schools possible in barnet (which is already one of the top boroughs for state schools) or was near fortismere (am glad I didn't buy the 1.5 bedroom flat which was right next to fortismere given catchment has expanded so much) and the freehold had been bought by the residents. Nothing else mattered.

That's why I am looking at private now cos I did all the state school hunting years ago. I am not sure how I can do better short of moving to Richmond or Kensington for fox primary or something (and then what do you do about secondary). Rail fares are ££££ and likely to increase above inflation plus a lot of the best schools outside London are in grammar areas (which has its own issues)... that may work actually at a later stage as many grammar schools like the ones in bexley and Orpington don't have a catchment for those taking the exam and I can save the move if my son gets in..

St albans and harpenden are so expensive I am not going to get much more for my money and will have £££ rail fares on top..

@Private2025 so you live near JFS (just guessing from what you’ve said) but your husband would prefer private? I lived opposite JFS when it was in Camden and it was a fantastic school then. If this is the school you’re talking about and ok the wage you’re on I’d consider state school.

You don't need to live near jfs to go there and it's a secondary school. It's in Kingsbury now, they moved there when my dh was 11 lol so a long time ago. It operates on faith based lottery (which is why when i chose my flat, i made sure that it was in an area which was on a school bus route to jcoss/jfs as well as being in catchment for a non faith school like archer just in case). I would prefer jcoss personally as it is more aligned with my religious beliefs and also Sunday times best school of the year. My dh went to jfs and didn't enjoy it..

I live in catchment for a Jewish state primary which is very highly ranked in the league tables. It is also affiliated with our synagogue. We did go there on a tour and didn't like it hence why we are at a loss. It is top 15 in the country and has lovely kids and parents so I am not sure how we are going to find better than that. the worst thing is dh thinks this school is worse than jfs.

I am just thinking maybe we should accept that the government has defunded education to the point that all my careful planning re state schools has come to nought and can only exist as an insurance option

Given your baby is new born.

Literally see if you can put 30k net per year into ISAs / savings now.

If you can you cam afford it and by the time your child starts school you have a 3 year buffer (assuming you dont have enhanced maternity leave pay)

Those savings will have stress tested affordability and provide a significant suffer meaning your child will 💯 be able to complete private primary.

Personally I think you are nuts to do this given your income and given you want a second child but your money your choices.

We have 12k take home and 2 kids and have ruled out private primary entirely we specifically moved to north london so we didnt have to. And as Jews you have superb options!!!
You have good options and honestly I think its a bit foolish to not even put your child in for a year or two to see especially given your income... which while healthy isnt setting the world alight.