Transferring from private to state - things not to say to/ask the Head.

[thedolly]

I have a meeting with the Head of our catchment primary school (5-9) next week.

So what things shouldn't I say/ask the Head if I want to give the right impression.

It's beginning to feel like a bit of a soap opera now - this is my 4th thread on the same topic . I nearly posted this in AIBU .

However it does have the potential of being quite a funny thread and it may even help me from committing an unwitting private/state faux pas.

Thanks.

Mainly from the home. Then a school with inspiring hard working teachers who can teach. Can be state or private. Surely as a teacher you know this.

FairyMum, of course you can. It is simply an irrational fear of mine that thinks it will be more of a struggle.

yes, but many 'graduates' of state schools would say the same thing.

It took me a long time, when I went to university, to get to grips with the reality of the lives that lots of people lived. I was deeply immature as a result. The things that I found out and learned from being in a far more inclusive environment made me the person I am today!

Thedolly - you are going to find that in the state school there will be parents who passionately care about their children's education just as much if not more than you do.

OK, time for a bit of personal info.

Everyone on here has got the totally wrong idea of me. I am from one of the 'roughest' areas of Belfast. I was born in 1968, the year the troubles began and I lived in the same very small terraced house until I went to University. Is it so wrong to want to give my children access to what is 'beautiful' in life.

I think we are often afraid of not giving our children the same lives that we had, and fear that if they don't have the same life, we are failing them, or jeopardising them in some way. We don't have experience of the differnt life, so that's understandable. But perhaps we should credit our children with more resilience, originality and ability to make the best of anything that life throws at them.

Actually, that's what I consider the best sort of preparation for life, and if DS grows upwith that, I will be happy.

Blu, did we x posts?

x-posted ther, thedollly.

Nothing wrong with wanting children to have what is beautiful. Nothing at all. But I am mystified that it can only come through private education.

OK, I have to go to bed.

Night!

Hmm..i am afraid you are the sort of parent who made me decide not to privately educate my children even if I can easily afford to send them to Eaton if I wanted to. You are not posh at all, just apirational. I stay away.

Thanks for your input Blu - goodnight .

thedolly - you are making a mistake about what are the beautiful things in life and trying to give them something you never had. What is worth far more to any child is a supportive, loving, stable home. Trees and pretty buildings are not the beautiful things in life. A happy and secure home is.

I can't believe you are still going on about this thedolly... it's been days now and you don't seem to have taken on board any comments.
You're going round and round in circles.
Why don't you leave it and come back when you have actually looked round a state school and spoken to the head because your views remain totally limited.

FairyMum, I don't understand what you mean? What is just aspirational?

ingles2 - how can you say that?

thedolly - I think you are taking this a little too personally. If you don't mind me saying you seem rather insecure. Would this be right?

hercules1, a happy and secure home is what they have, the rest is just the icing on the cake. But I happen to think that the home will be happier with me still in it as opposed to out working, which is why they will be going to the local primary after Christmas.

Thanks for the chat .

Insecure about parenting although my children are adorable and adored by all .

Fairly confident about most other things though.

Because I've just read the last few posts and you are saying the same things and having the same argument you were having in the first few pages of the first thread.
I can only conclude you've learnt nothing.
Take a break from it and actually go and see the school. It might make things clearer. Just don't be a pompous twat and ask about string quartets or whatever it was.

I am going on Wednesday morning at 9.30am....what more can I do?

thedolly - don't think you've failed and don't let the chidlren know that you're disappointed to send them to the local school. The education they will receive is at least equal to a private primary education, so there's really no reason to stress at all. Let us know how you get on with the meeting with the h/t and your look around the school. (Forget about children happily shinning up trees, etc, just look at how they look in the learning environment!)

Oh, and I've handed in their notice at school and told them and they've told their friends and I've told my friends.......

It doesn't mean it still doesn't weigh heavily on my mind.

Just think of it as moving your children from one state school to another and maybe you'll understand how I am feeling.

trickerg - I am not sure I am disappointed and the children are as excited as I am....there will be lots of benefits .

I have moved my dc from one state school to another. The difference being I had confidence in my decision.
Until you know the situation and have seen the school, you will continue you to blow this completely out of proportion in your head. As I said... take a break

I have confidence in my decision, I have confidence in my decision, I have confidence in my decision .