Transferring from private to state - things not to say to/ask the Head.

[thedolly]

I have a meeting with the Head of our catchment primary school (5-9) next week.

So what things shouldn't I say/ask the Head if I want to give the right impression.

It's beginning to feel like a bit of a soap opera now - this is my 4th thread on the same topic . I nearly posted this in AIBU .

However it does have the potential of being quite a funny thread and it may even help me from committing an unwitting private/state faux pas.

Thanks.

Its the same situation really.You are the client and he is the service provider.

LOL did anyone see the documentary 'Nursery University' where parents were competing to get their DC into pre schools which fed into 'desireable' elementary schools.The parents were advised that using hand gel after shaking the head teachers hand would put a black mark against their name .

bobthebuddha and gallery

You do have to have a thick skin when seeking advice on contentious issues on MN.

I tend to view the whole thing as a bit of a social experiment now and as such I have learned a lot about people and their prejudices.

On the whole I feel that I have very few prejudices, at worst I am 'ignorant' of certain facts and MN can certainly help fill in the gaps in my knowledge.

After a year or so I will be in the position of having embraced both the state and the private sector at primary level and will hopefully be in the position to pass on some unbiased advice to others.

Thank you to those of you who have offered well meaning advice - I do appreciate it and will take it all on board

thedolly
after 12 years of doing both state and private - state school coffee mornings/meet ups etc always have better biscuits

HTHs

"
This is not a job interview"

That is one big difference between the Sate sector and certainly some, if not most, independent schools. In the private sector it is!

What concerns me is that iirc thedolly is a teacher herself so doesnt really score that highly in the posh dept and should know herself what to ask and look for.....

hercules1 - you do indeed rc.

A-level teacher in the independent sector so not much use for primary.

Can teachers not be posh then?

I would know what questions to ask if I were looking for independent sector A level. I think from reading your threads you are trying to come across as posh, removed from the common people and ignorant of education in this country. I find it either sad that any teacher is so ignorant of state education or you're exaggerating so we are in awe of your supposed poshness and how great your kids are in comparison to scummy state ones. They're are all just kids and teachers.....

I could you tell you about state education in Northern Ireland hercules1 as that is what I have experience of.

It is a system in which I have complete faith.

In this country I have only experienced the independent sector (purely by accident) although I did do my teacher training in a state secondary school.

I don't define people as posh/scummy nor am I ignorant to the point of being closed minded. I had an irrational fear and I got over it.

I'm glad but surely you must realise the questions are the same.

I started this thread after I had arranged a meeting and I was beginning to think about what questions to ask.

I found this difficult actually as believe it or not I am fairly laid back () about the DCs education in terms of how much I get involved at school. I am always the one who is happy whilst others are rubbishing this and that.

I thought I would just ask to see the timetable and that would probably tell me all I needed to know about the academic side of things. Then it struck me that the whole sending the kids home with a copy of their timetable may be a 'private school' thing. Hence this thread was spawned.

Sorry for the ramble but I am feeling the need to defend myself a little.

A timetable would not tell you everything you needed to know about the school's academic side just as it wouldn't tell you everything you needed to know about an independent sixth form's academic side.
They will follow the national curriculum. Perhaps you need to refamiliarise yourself with this.

I am familiar with the national curriculum.

All I need to know is that there is a fairly even spread of sit down and active 'work' with scheduled play times. I would also like to see a fair amount of time devoted to science, ICT and maybe even some French in there.

I think that choosing a primary school and a sixth form are entirely different. A good sixth form can pretty much offer a 'tailor made' curriculum for starters.

I have been very open and honest in all my posts (anything else would be a waste of everyones time) and some of my thoughts are crystallising as I write sometimes.

DH and I have talked a lot about why it is that the Independent Sector seems to be more 'successful' than the State Sector. From studies I have read I am not convinced as some are that it is anything to do with class size.

One of the things we hit on when discussing it (taking into account our direct and indirect (nieces and nephews etc.) experiences was the idea that 'aspiration' had something to do with it. From there we rightly or wrongly assumed that there was more of 'it' in the Independent Sector. Hence the irrational fear and the plethora of threads.

I am sorry for coming across as if I think I am better than anyone else. I do not. Does any of this make any sense or should I just shut up now and sign off?

It is ludicrous can you not see to believe that children in state schools do not have aspirations. Really, it is.

Of course I don't mean all children - I just mean statistically that there are likely to be more children in the independent sector that do. Is that such a ridiculous notion?

You are making a vast sweeping judgement about a large amount of children.

FGS your 'notions' are ridiculous the dolly.
I repeat my emotion from yesterday.

A large amount of children in this country are being failed by something hercules1 - are they not?

I am not saying that the state sector per se is responsible, just that statistically you are more likely to find 'disaffected' students in the state sector. Is this not so?

Yes, it is ridiculous.

God help us if you are for real.

That's because most of the children go there....
I find it incredibly sad that you feel this way about the children you're own children will soon be mixing with.
I suggest you don't share your views with your children, the other children or their parents.

Yes, I feel (but cannot back it up statistically) that there is probably a higher ratio of disaffected children in state schools than private.

But I do know that there is real data to prove that bright children with motivated parents will do well in the state sector and are not disadbvantaged academically.

So, basically you are saying that the purpose of independent ediucation is to stay away from young people who are more disadvantaged, in that they live lives which have led to disafection.

your not you're (state educated you see)

I've been giving this some very serious thought and reflection

And no, I don't think teachers can under most circumstances be posh (possible exception for headmistress of a jolly-hockey-sticks boarding school like Roedean).