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Primary education

Join our Primary Education forum to discuss starting school and helping your child get the most out of it.

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Original poster

I feel sick at the thought of DD starting school.

17 replies

LynetteScavo · 17/06/2009 22:01

She'll be 4 in July, and I can't bear the thought of her starting full time school mid september. She still has an occational afternoon nap. I dont' think she'll be able to physically manage a full week of school.

Maybe it's because she's my last child and I want her to be my baby forever.
Please come and slap me, or hold my hand, which ever you think I need.

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

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emkana · 17/06/2009 22:18

I feel exactly like you about ds starting next year. So no words of wisdom and certainly no slap, just lots and lots of sympathy.

Clure · 17/06/2009 22:23

me too. My one and only DD will be starting in september. Feel so sad. Think she ready for it though. In terms of not being able to handle a full week, at my DD's school they do a gradual "induction" so for the first couple of weeks they only go in mornings, then a couple of weeks they stay to lunch then full time. i think a lot of schools do a bit of a gradual build up, the poor little mites get so tired (I teach in a primary school so I've seen them!) I've seen teachers letting little ones have a little nap on the cushions so sure your DD will be ok

Portofino · 17/06/2009 22:24

She'll be fine! I'm abroad and my dd has been at school since 2.5! And stopped naps by 4. I'm holding your hand! It is scary to let your baby go....

It's funny as I am so far removed from the UK way of doing stuff/school ages etc but my nan sent me a "summer dress" from Asda, one of those gingham things.(2 quid in sale)...anyway I imagined sending dd off to school in it - to proper UK primary school, and I got all emotional! Dd will start her 4th year in September!

kid · 17/06/2009 22:27

She will be fine. You will be surprised how quickly they get used to being at school all day.
I remember DS getting really grumpy after school and falling asleep for an hour or so when he got in. That last a few days to a week and then he was fine.

I am at the point of dreading DD going to secondary school. She will be starting Y6 in Sept

galaxyC · 17/06/2009 22:34

There will probably be lots of other children in you DD/S new classes that are in the same situation, same with the parents.
But remember the teachers and class assistants have the same thing every year and i am sure they have plans in place to deal with this.

You may find for a little while after starting that DD/S may want to nap soon after school as a sort of refresher. Or like many, they may be so excited about what they have been up to all day that they'll surprise you by being full of life and then sleeping slightly earlier and more settled in the evening.

No matter how they initially react, you'll both get into a good routine after a while.

Try not to worry to much as kids are very receptive. You don't want them worrying about you whilst your worrying about them.
Good Luck!!

Elibean · 17/06/2009 22:57

I'll hold your hand. I felt the same, and my dd1 is a December baby, which does make quite a difference, I think.

Her school was mornings only for the first term though, which helped a lot - even so, its a huge step for parents as well as children!

I found the induction evening for parents was a big help, I voiced my concerns and the teachers were so...human about it all, and so obviously aware of how little the kids in Reception are, that I felt a lot safer taking dd.

Needless to say, within a week she was fine and within half a term absolutely in love with school.

Parents don't get half the understanding the children do, IME - here, stuff the hand, take one large, unMNy hug

theDreadPirateRoberts · 17/06/2009 22:58

Are you sure she'll be fulltime? I thought it was general for children born after March to be mornings only for the first term or so?

Original poster

LynetteScavo · 17/06/2009 23:52

She'll be straight in full timeon Thurday 17th Sept. (no half days as an introduction).

The other school I was considering sending her to would have been Thursday and Friday mornings only, then in full time on the Monday. I think working mums were finding a slow intrduction difficult to find child care for. I know one school in teh area does a coupleof weeks of mornings or afternoons only, and some mums at toddler group have had to take holiday form work to deal with it.

I was abroad when they held the intoducotory parents evening last MOnday- I sent DH who didn't check out important things like whether they need to take a water bottle. Surely all schools allow water to be available now??

OP posts:

Greensleeves · 17/06/2009 23:55

I cried buckets when ds2 started

he's my littlest too and was only just 4. The sight of his little baby legs and toddler tum in school uniform was just AWFUL

but it won't feel as bad as all that once she's started - when you see her come skipping out of school with her friends with news to tell you and pictures to show you

and it doesn't change them instantly as some people maintain - my ds2 is nearly at the end of Reception, doing fine, and is still my adorable baby boy

Original poster

LynetteScavo · 18/06/2009 00:18

Thankyou Greensleves.

I tried a school dress on her, then quickly whipped it off, as it just looked so wrong.

OP posts:

katiestar · 18/06/2009 18:03

I'm in the same position.My baby starts in september .She's the youngest of 4 and it will be the first time for 15 years I haven't had a little one at home.
However so many mums have said this to me before and then within a few weeks of their Dc starting,they are moaning on about school finishing so early !

MollieO · 18/06/2009 23:39

Ds (prem born towards end June) started reception last Sept. Full time from first day. First couple of weeks he turned in to the child from hell - very very tired. Then something just clicked and he has been fine ever since. I made sure we had pretty quiet weekends to begin with but he has so much energy now he even does a swimming class on Friday evenings. I worried about him doing that but it is me who is the utterly exhausted one at the end of the week!

anniebear · 21/06/2009 12:04

no slap

will hold you hand and whilst I am will tell you ............my DD now 7, turned 4 2 days before she went into full time school (31st aug)

if she ahd been born 5 hours later she wouldnt have even started school that year
she was great! one of the first to go off in on her own and has always worked ahead of what she should be doing

Im sure your DD will be fine Hope you will xxxxxxxxxx

discoball · 21/06/2009 18:39

Please don't worry, it's surprising how quickly they get used to school and its routine and if she is so tired that she falls asleep, then they're not going to force the issue! I am now at the point where my DS has almost finished his first "year" at secondary school and I went through all the similar worries again, but for different reasons. It's really hard sometimes, isn't it? You are just a normal, caring parent! I am a TA in a reception class and have calmed down many children (and parents!) over the 6 years I've been doing it and I always tell the children that we are there to look after them and that nothing bad is going to happen and that we'll have a lovely time, etc.... and usually give them lots of "errands" to take their mind off it and they all love doing "special jobs!" I think it helps that I've been there myself and my DS's TA was invaluable and when I picked him up on the first day and she said "oh, he's lovely, can I take him home?" I thought, how lovely, to know that someone like that is working there! I really hope your DD will enjoy school and wish you both the VERY best of luck - I'm sure she'll thrive.

discoball · 21/06/2009 18:41

Sorry, meant to say... we allow water bottles (no other drinks though)and we also have fountains outside. I can't see that a school would not allow water!

epithet · 21/06/2009 18:47

Oh yes, I completely understand this. My dd2 is not 4 until just before they start and she completely has the 'baby legs and toddler tum' Greensleeves describes.

I can't bear the thought of packing her off tbh .

Doyouthinktheysaurus · 21/06/2009 19:04

Oh I went through this last year with DS2. He was 4 in July and started full-time in September.

I really worried so much and just wanted to keep him home. In fact he has coped brilliantly, he loves school and is doing really well.

He still hasn't lost his baby face though. Not sure he ever will TBH

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