tutor for a six year old

[sprout2]

I am looking for a tutor for my six year old son to help with his numeracy, writing and spelling. I have looked for tutors in the past, and have not found them particularly engaging.

I really need someone who will make learning fun, and will in turn build his confidence in the classroom.

I live in Walthamstow, so a tutor living in east or north london would be ideal.

Feenie - why are you surprised that tutors well, our tutor, uses modern teaching methods lol she?s a teacher! It wasn?t anyone with a tutor who was talking about paying someone to ??play?? with their child - that was just a silly interpretation of the phrase that was taken out of context and then extended to if you have a tutor you obviously never talk/play/cook/be with your child

I personally will only take my cars to modern garages with the best diagnostic computers

Trickerg - If the car was running well, I wouldn?t take it to a garage - it?s not about racing stripes - I think I made that clear in that ??if the car doesn?t start??

Seeker your last post makes it sound like you have actually read and understand what we have been saying

You'll be apologizing for the insults then?

No I was trying to be polite and not rehash all the crap comments you made before the last one - but hey ho

Welshwoman - I am not surprised. But I would not describe myself as a teacher who teaches through play (Y5 at the moment), yet by Umlellala's definition I clearly am. It's an unusual definition, and one that KS2 teachers wouldn't use.

"It wasn?t anyone with a tutor who was talking about paying someone to ??play?? with their child - that was just a silly interpretation of the phrase that was taken out of context.."
Umlellala talked a lot at first about playing, building bricks with children, and teaching parents how to play as a professional. Bronze said she was paying someone to spend time with and talk to her ds, since she had 4 children and felt she couldn't give him the time he needed.
"and then extended to if you have a tutor you obviously never talk/play/cook/be with your child"
No one said that, Welshwoman.

We're not only talking about you Welshwoman -IME lots of parents want the racing stripes (particularly in our 11+ area).

yes but no one on this thread Trickerg -

Feenie - I'm in an area which has pioneered the new foundation phase - ''learning through play'' is a mantra round here

Yes, it's common nationally, Welshwoman. But we weren't talking about Foundation phase.

Seeker, keep plugging that message about sharing books!!! Asked my Y2 class how many of them had ORT books at home. That response was quite unsettling too......

I didn't know until mumsnet that people were so obsessed with ORT scheme! Joining the local library would be far more beneficial.
Primary schools never used to have homework-it has come from parental pressure. Talking to your DC, playing games like scrabble and chess do far more good than more school work after 6 hrs at school. You can pick up lots of board games at car boot sales, one pack of cards can give a huge selection of card games (you don't even have to buy a book on it-I'm sure that you would find lots of explanations on the Internet).
There are lots of sites that give maths and literacy games for free that are fun e.g.this site-even tells you which age they are for
Letting your 6 yr old follow a recipe, go shopping with a list and find prices etc, grow some veg in a container are just a few of the things where you can use everyday life and much better than having the formality of a tutor twice a week.
Play charades, 20 questions-the list is endless.
I didn't realise that I had the potential to earn such easy money as a tutor-however I would feel guilty!

I realize that it is ridiculous to get upset about being called names by a faceless person on the internet, and I know I should let this go but I can't.

Will somebody please tell me what I have said to be called a thick patronizing cow who talks crap?

Nothing, seeker - welshwoman was extremely rude. Ignore - although I know it can sometimes not be easy!

Have just skimmed through and have to say am a mite amused that the OP disappeared way back. Seeker you know what this place is like, just move on. + fwiw Welshwoman, I can't see why you needed to be so insulting either, but each to their own. Sun's shining here, hope it is where you are

The irritation was that seeker implied that parents who sought tutors to help their children were stupid and that schools and parent between them were always sufficient. Which they are not. When you have watched your child get into a real pickle surely it is the good parent who gets in help? A motivated child will of course enjoy all the simple support stuff, playing games, reading recipes etc, but one that is frankly scared of words will find it undermining to have constant battles at home as well as at school. As well as making everyone very unhappy.

I do agree about the tutoring companies, although actually we had a rep that told us not to use his scheme. There is a huge difference between child centred one to one help and universal schemes. But then there is also a huge difference between the most well meaning and lovely parent and someone who has experience and training in specific skills such as reading or maths. I attended my sons's lessons and it was enormously helpful, as I understood for the first time how words in the English language actually work. dh and I have three post-grad qualifications between us, and I am a complete bookworm. But we still couldn't show ds how to read in a way that he understood. The tutor could, and she made a huge difference to ds's life in the four or five sessions taught.

nooka..but schools should work with parents and teach parents how too....and that does make a difference...

Well of course they should and ours did fairly well on ds's behaviour, but they were totally uninterested in his educational problems, because they just didn't see them. We felt that the behaviour was directly related to his dyslexia - indeed the ed psych said the two often went together (although she got very academic on the causality issue). In any case few schools have the resources for one on one help for children who are struggling but get by - as a parent it is easier to spot that gap, and certainly more personally concerning.

And the techniques the specialist tutor was using were not the same as the school had used, as she was a pure phonics specialist, and ds got the tail end of mixed methods teaching. She had to pretty much take him back to basics, and build from there.

nooka, I completely agree with you.

Thanks Nooka - I'm glad you saw the implications of Seekers posts not just me

And you are so much more eloquent than me without being rude J

I did make it clear (I thought!) that what I said applied to NT children!

"The irritation was that seeker implied that parents who sought tutors to help their children were stupid"

As a kindness - please show me where I did this?

Ds, according to the schools system is NT. If you read some of the phonics literature there is an interesting debate as to whether dyslexia stands on it's own or is simply the result of poor (or perhaps inappropriate) teaching of difficult languages like English. In any case there is no line where a child is totally "normal" on one side and has significant special or educational needs on the other. Many kids struggle in just one or two places, and likewise many parents just may not have the skills, time or energy in a few areas, and might feel that getting someone to help there is the best thing to do.

Bandying phrases like 'angst ridden "worried well"' and saying that 'NT 6 year olds do not need tutors for ANYTHING' does suggest that you feel getting help (outside of school) is pointless, and your comments about tutoring companies being a big con does suggest that you think people who do get a tutor are at the very least gullible. I don't think that you are stupid btw, or a cow. I just think you should remember that for some of us seeing our child struggle (ds would throw serious tantrums at the very idea of reading a page or two of a book, or learn five words for a spelling test) was a bloody awful experience. I spent months looking for a way to help ds, and got a recommendation from MN in fact - no one was coming to me and offering superfluous help.

Thinking of your driving lessons metaphor, yes generally I would agree, but if the effect of the driving school is that your learner refuses to get in the car, and if you know that it really really matters that they learn, and learn now then I really don't see why you are refusing to even acknowledge that for some children a little bit of extra tailored help can make an enormous difference, and when the learning is not optional (I refused to drive for 15 years and it really didn't affect my life much, but struggling to read can cause a serious blight in the short and long term) letting your child struggle is not an option many of us really want to follow in the hope that maybe it will all work out at some point in the future (a six year old may have had almost two years of teaching to read in any case).

I still maintain 6 is too young for a private tutor as children undergo such major changes between the ages of 6 and 8. Many of the children who have been 'behind' in Y1 will have caught up with the others in Y4. IME, (and this is a very general statement!) the boys are a little behind the girls developmentally in Y1/2, but have caught up by Y3/4.

I also maintain that 1:1 tuition of any kind after school is a drain on the child, when they should be having a rest.

The Dyslexia Institute won't even assess children until they are 7 years old, for those very developmental reasons.

trickerg you wouldn't like it in New York City, where we lived for a while last year. School was 8.30-2.30, with an extra class for a fairly big proportion (both my kids), plus about 2hrs homework, and for many children additional language school a couple of times a week (my landlord's children went to Greek school for two hours twice a week), then there would be catechism classes for all the Catholic children, and for many sport and music too. This was for 7/8+ yrs olds, but it was extreme. As we left the school asked us if we'd like to send the children to Saturday school too! Now we live in Canada and there is pretty much no homework, and very little extra tuition either. I think that is generally how it should be.

ds was assessed at the Dyslexia Institute (Dyslexia Action now I think) at seven. He'd already lost a huge amount of confidence and picked up lots of ways to distract his teacher from the fact he didn't understand what they were teaching him. His problems were an issue in reception, I'm not sure that waiting two years really did him any favours, although yes of course we hoped he would grow out of them as many children will.

nooka you said your child was dyslexic - of course children facing particular challenges may need extra help.

I did not say that all tutoring companies are a big con. I said that parents need to be wary. And I challenge any parent not to become a bit angst ridden if they discover that a significant percentage of their 6 year old's friends have tutors. I see nothing wrong with reminding people that the tutoring companies don't make their money by telling people that their child is doing fine.