Helping your children to listen - what works for you?

[maggiethecat]

Dd as far as I'm aware does not have a listening disorder but seems to be just very chatty and excitable which gets in the way of listening.
I gather that in class she is sometimes warned for not listening and I have observed in her music lessons that she often ignores instructions and carries on doing her own thing.
At home, similar issue as she likes to do her own thing despite being corrected, told off, threatened with the withdrawal of treats etc. Even if it works at the time, she's back to her usual self very soon.

What can I be doing better?

These are the type of thing I'd suggest in school and some may work at home for you

Activities to develop listening and attention skills

1. Listening to sounds on CD ? there are commercial materials available, or you can make your own. Ask the pupils to listen to a sound and do a specific activity.
2. Sound bingo ? listening to sounds on CD and covering the correct picture.
3. Sound walk ? listening for different sounds they head on a walk, then using these to paint a picture or compose a group poem.
4. Simon says ? listen carefully for specific instructions and then do the actions.
5. Share reading ? using big books to help focus attention on the visual cues.
6. Circle-time activities ? when one child is speaking they could hold a listening shell, which means that everyone else (including the adults) must listen to what they say.
7. Story CDs ? listening-centre activities can include listening to story CDs interspersed with activities related to the text.
8. Who am I? ? miming activities can be related to a classroom topic (story characters, occupations, people in the school).
9. Parachute activities ? pupils need to listen carefully to the instructions in order ot be part of a team activity.
10. Messages ? ask the pupils to recall simple messages.
11. Chinese whispers ? pass an action message round the circle. The last pupil to receive the message has to perform the action.
12. Listen and colour ? colour a picture by listening to the instructions.
13. Listen and draw ? draw a picture by listening to the isntructions (there are some published materials for this).
14. Twenty questions ? allow the pupils twenty questions to discover the identity of a hidden object related to a class project. Pupils need to listen carefully to make deductions.
15. Hot-seating ? one pupil chooses to be a particular story character and sits in the 'hot seat'. The other pupils ask questions to discover the identity of the character. This works well for all ages, from Little Red Riding Hood to Romeo.

we have same problem. I had to get ds full attention. which involves:

1. catch
2. Get attention
3. Get to look at me
4. Say want needed (keep v short)
5. get ds to confirm what told

Some of the stuff mrz recommended is very similar to ideas given to us by ds' speach therapist.

We use verbal games where ds has to wait for a signal before he can do something.
Plus musical bumps. Sounds strange but he just can't do it even now. But it has improved his listening skills.

How old is dd?

Good ideas both. Mrz, altho class oriented I will think about the principles involved and try adapting some of yours for home situation.

frustratedmom - that's what I do with DH too - esp the "confirm" bit!

My friend got so frustrated when her dd was about 7, and decided just to do the same back. She spent best part of a day ignoring her daughter, so giving her a taste of what it's like. At the end of the day after DD was absurdly cross and frustrated, she sat her down with some treats and a hug and had an honest chat with her about how it feels. Changed her behaviour pretty much over night.

i like that idea - will try it with ds when he is a bit bigger don't think he'll get point at 4 (only just learnt to miss me)

When working with children, have found that actually explaining why we listen and what we do when we listen can help, even with a 4 yr old. Have used posters on fridge as a reminder with pictures.
When we listen we:
Look at the person who is speaking
Stop what we are doing/ keep our hands still
Keep our lips still
Think about what they are saying.

Or things along these lines.

My sister struggled at school and has told me that she would be told to listen/ that she wasn't listening etc and didn't understand what that meant, she would be looking at the teacher and all she would be thinking about was "I've got to listen, I've got to listen..." instead of actually listening.

The confirming thing works with my ds but I don't always make him have eye contact with me as this can end up being a bit of a power struggle event which leads us away from the listening.

If it is 1 child not listening in a group I give them the evil eye. I also when I have the class tend to clap a rhythm to get them to clap it back, I sing action songs to get them back with me, For example evrybody do this do this or wind the bobbin up.
I play games like I am thinking of an animal this animal has four legs ect. This gets them listening and shows me who has listening, I also when lining children up send them out individually by describing them ie this person has brown hair ect.

I also use my voice often I use a quiet voice the realy listen when I do this.

After stories I ask key questions to gage who is listening.

Hope that helps.