Playdates.....does anyone else worry about leaving kids with complete strangers?

[neverknowinglyunderdressed]

I've got twins who are comming up to 5. They started school in the summer in a new area so we dont know anyone.

We have had one school friend here so far, once. He happened to be son of the mum i am most friendly with. Her husband is a teacher so i think that kinda allayed my fears.

Today 3 diff sets of parents asked if my kids could come over for a play date. One in particular was quite pushy so i said yes. I dont know her or her husband at all. I feel weird about letting a stranger pick them up from school and take them to her house. I know my DH feels the same way.

The arrangment is for Monday after school. Am i being silly?

Hear Hear Cory!

Don't you just love MN?

Are all these people who are paranoid about leaving their DC at schoolchums' houses the same people who go on about insisting that their DC go to the local State school because they believe in community and mixing with all sorts in society?

ROFL

My goddaughter had a play date at 10 with a little girl in her class.

Turns out the parents made a lot of money in the adult film industry. My friends didnt know this before hand !!!

They had a good time apparantly

The is a difference, MMJ, between being sensibly responsible and being ridiculously PFB.

I'm not trusting them implicitly - I am leaving my child with their child for 2 hours on Friday after school.

I think you have to know something about the house & parents before trusting your 5yo to them. I would not be put out if the mother (or father, or nanny, childminder etc) asked to attend a play date or even if they just wanted to stay for 10 minute to make sure thir LO settled. In fact this would probably make me feel better about having thier LO over.

I cant honestly belive that parents of a 5yo would leave thier kids with someone they dont know AT ALL and am that some people seem to think that having a child in the same class as thier LO is proof enough that your LO will be looked after properly!

Dont think the 'strange man' comment was meant to be offensive BTW, dont parents of all little girls and little boys tell them never to go off with a 'strange man' (or 'strange woman)?

One mother of one of ds's friends (also 5), picks him up from school with me, stays for coffee and then leaves. This is because he is quite shy but I have no problem with a parent coming a long if they say that their child has never been round to someone's house where he does not know the adults and they just want to "settle" him in.

I am neither very naive nor foolish.

It's a fairly sh*t life if you distrust everyone.

I'm not having a go at you MMJ. You were in the 'sensibly responsible' category!

I was commenting on the likes of the OP who was worrying about 'leaving kids with complete strangers'. The obvious answer is to get to know the parents/family first, not stop their kids going on all playdates.

No Kelix, most parents tell their children not to go off with strangers.

What would I do if I went and found they'd been kidnapped by aliens??

You are saying to mistrust everyone because you do not trust them to look after your child. Do you really think that a single planned visit from you is going to prove anything about the parent? Obviously they aren't going to drink/have the rabid dogs about if they know you're coming to check up on them - to believe that would be naive and foolish

I have never told my children not to go off with "a strange man" or indeed, "strange woman"

I have told them that I will never send anyone they don't know to collect them from anywhere.

I have told them that they don't have to go with anyone they don't want to.

But I have never told them to be afraid of, or not to talk to strangers.

How often do you hear stuff along the lines of "I would never have thought it of them and I've know them for years!"

REtired Goth - have you thought of laminating your CRB checks and hanging it around your neck like a company ID tag (of course it would have to be a tad bigger but its only fair that men should be branded identifiable if they are trustworthy)