Welfare check after three day absence - is this normal?

[SnottyLittleMango]

Hi, I have no experience of this as DD8 has had 100 percent attendance for the last two years, but has had a really nasty virus this week and has been off since Tuesday. I've called the school each morning to let them know but we had a welfare officer turn up this morning asking to see her. No problem with that- she was sat on the sofa with DH both in PJs as he's also got the bug now, I was just surprised especially as he was a bit rude to DH, asking why he was dressed like that (in his PJs I assume) in a pretty snarky way. Is this normal for a three day absence from primary? No problems at all with the school.

Our school say they do a welfare check on day 5 of absence, although we've never had 5 days off in one go, so don't know if it always happens. I always slightly suspected it was a) to check on the child and b) to check you aren't actually on holiday.

I'd be annoyed at an unexpected visitor who criticised me being in my pj's though!

You might find a clue within the school's safeguarding policy, which should be on their website. It's most likely a blanket thing, or as a pp suggests a consequence of the school messing up their answerphone messages. I'm aghast at the welfare officer questioning a sick man about being in his pyjamas.

The pyjamas comment was very rude and poor manners

I know. That is exactly what we said. We called the school to complain and the deputy headteacher told us we were wrong to refuse. He had previously been head of safeguarding but thought we should let a stranger into our teens bedroom. He told us he had never had anyone refuse that request before. I told him that other parents need to protect their children more then and it’s those parents who they should have the issue with.

The thing that disgusted me the most was he asked why we were so against a professional seeing our child. I said my child, a teenager, is ill, in bed not dressed, and gets to have privacy in their bedroom. He said he found it concerning that our child wouldn’t be dressed in the daytime. My head nearly exploded at this point. I explained that it is very normal to be in bed if you’re ill, and very normal to not be dressed in bed, but it’s like all common sense went out the window. He said he was logging all of my comments as they were concerning him. 🤯 So it doesn’t surprise me at all that they questioned why a sick father was in pyjamas. It’s fucking mental.

@BendingSpoons I think you might be on to something there its about checking families aren't on holiday.

A few years back hospital got a welfare check done on me for PND, really it was tiredness, and other stuff that was too much.
It took the HV about a month to actually visit me.

What an absolute idiot.
I wouldn't be allowing a welfare officer into my kids bedroom either.

What qualifications do you need to be a snoop sorry Welfare Officer?

The welfare check, meh it’s very OTT but I’d just assume it’s policy and think no more about it. I would have been very annoyed about someone questioning my choice of clothing in my own home though! How rude.

Urghhh I hate these intrusive visits (not that we've had them, just read about them). You are under NO obligation to let them enter your home. You can call your child to come to the door so they can see them, then send them on their way.

I'd absolutely be making a complaint about the snarky comments regarding your ill DH being in his pyjamas in his own home. How fucking dare he question this?

Utter morons, the lot of them. Fucking busybodies.

I would be absolutely furious if they turned up (unless I hadn’t been calling/made no contact). I certainly wouldn’t be letting them in

No need to worry OP. I work in a very naive school and welfare checks are automatically triggered after 3 days. Sometimes via email but always with the welfare officer and the teacher chasing up.

It’s good they’re looking out for the kids

No thats intrusive not looking out for kids.
It wouldn't be unreasonable for a child to be off school for a few days, 24hr being sick and 48hr to be sure they are clear off it.

Schools have holidays longer than 3 days. I think its more to do with 'illegal holidays' than genuine child welfare

What on earth is a 'naive school'??

I think thats mean to read nieve?

3 days seems a bit unnecessary. If a child vomit on a Sunday night and into Monday, they’ll miss 3 days just because of the 48 hr rule. It must happen fairly regularly.

OK, but what's a 'nieve school' even?

Never heard of it.

The welfare officer would have no luck with me! My child would be at a relatives for care whilst I was at work. So they'd not be getting in more than likely!

My DH is a teacher, but he has nothing to do with the welfare officer and has no idea what would happen if we weren't home 🤣.

Ignore my spelling- never my strong point

naive
/nʌɪˈiːv,nɑːˈiːv/
adjective
(of a person or action) showing a lack of experience, wisdom, or judgement.

So because a few monsters hurt their children, every parent of a school aged child in the U.K. is expected to accept that a representative of the state has the right to access your home at their volition if your child is ill, have free entry to your child’s bedroom and pass comment on what the child and other members of the household may be wearing.,,, and oh yes, if you dare to do so much as politely quibble , some power crazed imbecile will note it down as concerning,,,..

It’s a con based on compliance of the genuinely polite and moderate. They have no legal right of access. If they’re worried they can contact the police etc. They won’t!

I wouldn't let them in under those circumstances either, and I'm involved in attendance in the primary I work in.

Yes I know what naive means, but how can you apply that to a school? Doesn't seem to make sense.

I think she meant the “naice”. A word I’ve only ever heard on MN, and I think means like solidly middle class, not rough. Waitrose is “naice”.

Oh right, well I get that then. Was confusing!

Nieve isn't a word. Naiive is, but doesn't make sense in the sentence used.

OP, do you know your child's school's overall attendance level? I wonder if it is very poor, and these extreme procedures are the result.

I'd still refuse entry to the house, though. But would get my child to give them a wave at the top of the stairs.

Maybe some of these EWOs need some training. They should have liaised properly with school so that they know the families where there is a real concern that the child is not actually in bed sick.