Permanent exclusion - autistic child

[Mayalamadingdong]

Hi,
I'm hoping for some advice from SEND mums in a similar position.
My son, 9, has just been permanently excluded from primary school, 2 weeks before the summer holidays.
He is autistic and has ADHD. He is very clever, amongst top 1% in SATS, but has severe behavioural, communication and sensory issues which means he's been struggling a lot at his mainstream school.
He's been studying in isolation with a 1 to 1 for 2 years now. Mostly he's been doing OK, but occasionally he has violent outbursts and he would hurt staff or damage property. He's been excluded for a few days at a time frequently for years now, and now they've decided to permanently exclude after he's attacked a teacher.
I understand where they're coming from and I know they've been trying to support him.
He is in the process of getting an EHCP (we've been in the queue for 2 years, our council is shocking). The Local Authority now says they'll rush it through given his circumstances.
However, we are now stuck without a school, and we were told it's unlikely he'll have a school place for at least a few months of the next academic year.
My questions are, to those who have gone through similar issues:

1. What are you meant to do while waiting for a place? Just educating them at home yourself? We are nowhere near qualified to meet his educational needs, and work full time. How are we meant to do this?
2. What kind of school would accept a child that isn't behind academically but has a history of violence and erratic behaviour?
3. How do we keep him 'socialising' while he's at home? He has no friends and our friends' kids don't really spend much time around us as it can be risky.

Is there a way to seek out other families in similar situations? I don't want him staring at 4 walls on his own for 6 hours a day :(

Any advice would be much appreciated.

(PS in the 5 minutes it took me to write this, he's managed to threaten a stranger he would kill her, and try to choke his brother... it's endless 🫩)

That sounds really tough OP.
I sit on PX Panels at a couple of schools and we have to uphold to reverse the schools decision to PX.
We look at what has been done to date to support the childs needs and if anything more could have been done and if the proper process has been followed.
I have to say though that violence against a teacher is pretty much a red line as everyone has the right to feel safe at work and not face physical threats.
Sometimes a PX is the only way for a child to get the help that they really need and some of the kids I have been involved in PXing actually end up in environments that are beneficial to them such as specialist provision
Best of luck

Does he have a PDA profile?

Unfortunately everyone I know with a child with significant SEN like you're describing either one works PT around the FT worker as is what happened with me or if they're on their own they couldn't work at all. It really sucks.

What are your workplace options for extended leave?

Thanks @Hoppinggreen , we've decided not to challenge the school's decision as we know we won't win this. We're just trying to understand what's next given that there are no suitable schools fitting my son's profile given he has no learning disability but serious behaviour issues.
His dream was going to grammar school as he's already acing 11+ mock exams, and he wants to benefit from the local one's music programme (he plays the violin), but we know now it's not happening... we're so sad letting go of his dreams but we know it's not something he's capable of :(

@gamerchick he does have a PDA profile but the psychiatrist who diagnosed him says she doesn't acknowledge this diagnosis so he's not officially PDA. But it's definitely the case that any rules based or authority based interaction is extremely challenging for him.
Are you saying that for kids like these there isn't a full time school option?

Is there a special provision or somewhere similar you could send him? Our trust have a few provisions where we send students like your son when we can tell they’re not coping with mainstream school, these kids thrive!

I am.a governor and we recently PX a child for similar reasons.

The school had done everything and more to support and keep the child in school, however, a physical assault on a member of staff or student is literally the point of no return.

The LA are responsible now for supporting his education, so they either need to find him a suitable place or they need to offer a form if alternative provision until a suitable place is available.

However, without the EHCP it will be pretty hard to sort out.

Is he under any sort of camhs support? Are any other support services in place at all?

Do you know what his triggers are or what caused the outburst where he assaulted the teacher?

@BreakingBroken I'm an executive and my position is too demanding to do this. I'd probably lose my job, which is our main income. However my husband works for NHS and might reduce his hours if needed.
Frankly I'm not really built for round the clock SEND care and we don't have much family or friend support, and I know I'd lose my mind if I had to be the only adult caring for my son. It takes a village but we have no village...
Also I think a child should spend some of their time, even if reduced hours etc, with people outside his home so they can feel part of a community. School was definitely that for my son, and he feels bereft now. It's so wrong to just push it back to families and give up on them like this.

@PixelRainbow we've been told none have a place at the moment...

@Ihatelittlefriendsusan I know the school did all they can so we're not challenging it. We just wish they could have kept him until EHCP is sorted and a suitable place is found.
He's always testing people's boundaries and is triggered by sensory things as well as demands/rules. He's really challenging to work with, but he's equally a funny, imaginative, interesting and talented boy and all his teachers adored him despite his outbursts.
The EHCP is very close to being finalised, I'm in touch with the LA who have assured me of this. The problem is there are no suitable schools for his set of needs and I worry he'll be forgotten.

Under Section 19 (1) of the Education Act 1996 the Local Authority has a legal duty to provide children of compulsory school age with a suitable education. Leaving him without any education for 'a few months' is illegal. I would seek urgent advice from IPSEA.

More advice from the National Autistic Society here: https://www.autism.org.uk/advice-and-guidance/topics/education/exclusions/exclusion-england/permanent-exclusion

I had to leave my job as my daughter’s needs were similar. She hasn’t been PX but we get calls quite often as she’s emotional and has outbursts that can be hard to settle. She has an EHCP which helps as she gets a lot of support but my only advice is one of you needs to be home. It’s not easy I know xxx

It's not really diagnosed officially. It should be. I don't understand why myself. PDA needs a total different way of handling.

It can challenging to find a school that can meet the needs of a kid with a PDA profile though. Even SEN schools can struggle, even if there is a bespoke EHCP. It's either home educated, ETOAS or reduced timetable. Ultimately there's no working full time for one parent.

However I'm probably in a different area to you. You might find that school that can meet need.

Unfortunately schools are not there for childcare but if ehcp funding is secured the LA can allocate it to things such as care packages to help support you and give specialist support to your ds.

There are advocacy programs out there who can help navigate the arena, but the LA have to provide a placement, but you will have to be belligerent in your pursuit of them to find somewhere. Just be aware it may be outside your normal area and then they will have to provide transport

LA does have a duty of care BUT if no places exist, what do you suggest they do @enoughtomakeasailorspairoftrousers? That’s not me having a go by the way! It’s awful how some children are just left to fall through the cracks and makes me want to scream. Here it’s either mainstream that can be unsuitable or a very specialist setting that takes extreme cases so isn’t suitable either. Friends have been offered a few hours a week at private forest school or thrive places but if there isn’t full time provision that is suitable and available they are stuck! Close friend currently going through hell trying to sort out AP and getting nowhere since her daughter was PX

I wouldn’t be too sure about giving up on a grammar school. They are very different environments from primary, and if he’s capable academically then why shouldn’t he have a jolly good crack at the entry exam? If he passes he should be treated like any other child for admissions unless an EHCP names another school? He might find a grammar environment easier to cope with.

I’m not a SEN parent so I get it’s easy for me to type this when I’m not living the constant battle with school when behaviour goes south.

I think you need to sacrifice your full time job to be honest.

When we had a gap between exiting mainstream and going to a special school I had to reduce my hours, rope in family and my dh had to change job. It was about 18 months in total.

In that time the LA provided a 1 to 1 tutor for 3 1 hour sessions a week. A behaviour support specialist for 2 hours a week and we managed to get a day on a animal care place. Apparently there was a sports option run by a charity.

People if there are really no schools get EOTAS packages which means education other than at school. A lot have to give up work to facilitate this.

Otherwise you search further and further afield for a school that meets needs or sacrifice academics for the right environment and therapeutic support on the basis you get that right, its easier to get tutors.

Everyone is entitled to parental leave. It’s usually unpaid but one or probably both of you need may need to take this until you’ve sorted new schooling. You can take up to 4 weeks a year which will buy you a little bit of time.

What will the EHCP say about the kid of school he needs op? Are you looking at specialist?

He might cope better in a grammar school. I don’t think you should give up main income. Could DH ask for a sabbatical for a few months?

This is when they have to: fund a private school, fund education other than at school, or find an out of area placement and fund transport.

@MayalamadingdongI suggest you or your OH start researching alternative provisions and SEN schools now. Do not ignore those that are full
I would also seek out your local NAS or Specisl Needs support groups for parents who can advise.

to be frank most parents of a SEN child with your son’s level of need end up with one parent (not always the mother) giving up work or running a very flexible business around the child.

Also do not forget that behaviour is a form of communication. They were failing him long before he got violent.
my daughter had occasions of being violent at Primary school, but almost none at secondary (mainstream) and is now headed for a top University.
Just take one day at a time.

I note your comment at the end of your post.

What sort of help is in place to protect the lives of people he comes into contact with generally? He is clearly physically able to carry these threats out hence the PX due to a teacher attack. Surely there is something that can be done before someone innocent is seriously hurt? (I say this as I know of someone who died hitting his head as he fell following a punch.)

If that can be controlled then, presumably, education could be provided too.

In the meantime, presumably he has 24/7 supervision?

The LA is responsible for providing alternative provision to permanently excluded pupils. This applies even without an EHCP. You do not have to electively home educate.

The EHCP process is governed by timescales set out in law. If an EHCNA request was made 2 years ago, they were in breach of these a long time ago. Email the Director of Children’s Services. IPSEA has a model letter you can use. When you say close to finalised, what do you mean? Has DS had all the necessary assessments? Do you have a draft?

Have you had social care assessments as part of the EHCNA? If not, request them. On their website, Contact has model letters you can use.

A minority of specialist schools who cater for academically able DC. If it is inappropriate for provision to be made in a school, there is EOTAS/EOTIS. You don’t have to give up work with EOTAS/EOTIS. Parents are not responsible for the education. The LA is. Parents can’t be compelled to facilitate provision by giving up work. You can’t even be compelled to accept provision in the home.

For schools that are not wholly independent, being full isn’t enough for the LA to refuse to name them in an EHCP. The LA has to prove the school is so full admitting DC is incompatible with the efficient education of others or use of resources. There is a point LAs can do this, but it is higher than LAs and many schools admit.