Not bashing, school have not been in contact at all, what should we do?

[drspouse]

Highly aware that teachers are under masses of pressure.
DH is KW and currently he's quarantining in the spare room (due to upcoming hospital appointment not symptoms), DS has SEN and his school have been great, loads of work packs, calling every day.
DD has been in on average one day a week but will do next to nothing at home. She's in Y1 and has an IEP.
Today she screamed for 10 minutes then read four pages, took 45 minutes to find 3 words in a word search, did crafts (she'd happily do only crafts, ever),

I emailed her teacher 10 days ago to say she was not coping. No reply. Not a single phone call the whole time she's been off. No emails.

We can't read some of the work set on the school website and the rest is too hard for her e.g. phonics way ahead of where she is, she's only just doing one more/one less. School said they were going to give the class the same choice boards in class, we asked the class teacher to let us know what she had done (she never tells us) on days she's in. No answer to that either.
What can we do now? I'm trying to work, she's learning nothing and just getting upset, DH can't help but she won't do anything for him normally anyway, she was already really behind!

What else do you want people to say though when every other option available is all wrong for you?
I've said I'll be contacting the school again. Did you read that part?

@ActuallyItsEugene what do they do after that? Or do they just watch TV?

The Reception videos are only phonics and she's done the levels they are on. She needs to progress.

Have you looked at the Reception lessons available on Oak Academy?

Or do they just watch TV?

Sometimes just watching TV is enough. They internalize the lesson, learn through songs, repetition and funny videos.

If you want something more, then use the reception teacher videos, which seem to be at the right level and are exactly what you want from your daughter's teacher.

"So we'd have to prewatch everything, filter out all the worksheets that are too hard, find new ones, find new explanations, every day for everything."

That's what teachers do. The 30 children in my class might be learning a similar thing, probably even the same work, but all with varying levels of support, teaching and help. Matching the work to the child isn't as easy as giving them all different stuff and stepping away.

It is hard to match that at home and I've had conversations with parents where they also feel like their children are going backwards. Its frustrating for me on the end of the phone as their teacher because I know they could do so much better with me. And also because I know the work I am currently setting is more of a one size fits all approach. Totally different to how it would be in a classroom.

In a classroom I can see who understands after I've taught them. I can see who 'gets it' straight away and who needs more help. Who needs moving on to a challenge when they find it easy. I can see who just isn't in the mood today and come back to it later. Right now your teacher isn't going to be able to do that for your daughter.

I think remember that now you are the one who sees daily how your daughter is doing so you're better placed than her teacher to see what she can cope with.

You've had some great advice on here. I agree with other posters that you need to focus on what she can do and find tasks that you can enjoy together.

It just isn’t going to be possible for a mainstream school to provide the same level of support for an individual child as the PRU is able to.

(I’m another who remembers what you said about the PRU before DS went there. You do catastrophise a lot and dismiss all suggestions without giving them a chance, it makes it very hard for anyone to help you.)

Does Oak have new lessons each week like Bitesize?
Again I can see Reception and Y1 maths, 5 lessons in each,vY1 is all too hard, all but one of the 5 YR lessons is too easy, do they then do something or do they just watch the video?

If you have time, read books to your dd. Her books, your books, magazines-anything. Get her to follow along, point out words that she recognises. Put up key words around the house & encourage her to read them. Play snap with words, letters, phonic blends. Try not to make a big issue out of learning. I’ve been teaching primary for a long time & going backwards does sometimes happen, but I’ve yet to meet a child that leaves primary school unable to read. She will be ok. I hope her school offer some constructive advice soon.

@drspouse

Does Oak have new lessons each week like Bitesize? Again I can see Reception and Y1 maths, 5 lessons in each,vY1 is all too hard, all but one of the 5 YR lessons is too easy, do they then do something or do they just watch the video?

You're not going to get something that is perfectly pitched exactly at your DD's level, especially as you don't want to do anything planning or prep yourself.

@PineconeOfDoom were you one of the people telling me I had to give up my job and home educate DS?

That's what teachers do.
And I'm not a teacher.
And in school they DO provide different levels even BEFORE they see who's grasped it and other schools (mainstream) are providing differentiated work and video explanations of some things. And calling to find out how children are learning and coping.

you are the one who sees daily how your daughter is doing so you're better placed than her teacher to see what she can cope with.
I don't think that's me. I actually think her class teacher is magic and wish she was in our house getting DD to learn!

Come on @drspouse, there are 30 different maths lessons for Reception on Oak Academy already, if you spend a bit of time this weekend I'm sure you can find a few that you feel are the right level for your DD

Can I just say this again for the hard of reading
I HAVE NO TIME TO DO ANY PREP.

I think all you can do is continue to email the school to create a paper trail of your concerns - class teacher, sendco and head. Be the squeaky wheel - I freely tell my DC's teachers that I know it's often the only way to get help.

Ask for the reception work instead. While you may feel this is too easy, current schooling appears to be more about not losing skills already learnt than teaching new ones. I would see the easier work in terms of giving your daughter some quick wins and show her that she is capable. It might build her confidence a little. She does not need to know that the work is for younger pupils.

I do understand, as I have 2 sen children myself and after Easter when they changed the programme of work sent home from 'death by worksheet' - a hurriedly put together pack when schools closed, DS1 really lost the plot and absolutely refused to engage in the new work set. DD2 also had a major meltdown over it and spent much of our learning time underneath the dining table or just reading a book. We rolled with it and I looked at the national curriculum guidance to see what they should be learning for their year groups. Using that, I was able to prepare some simple activities which piqued their attention but didn't appear too 'school-like'. DS1 spent ages colouring in sheets where he had to solve the sum in order to know what colour to use. Is this something which would appeal to your DD? They are freely available on coloring squared, an american site but helped us out of a bind.

In terms of work, ours are set 4 pieces every day - Spellings/Times tables, Reading, Maths and English/Grammar. Every year group has those same 4 headings plus what they call 'one a day' where it will be something like create an obstacle course, make a wind chime using sticks, draw a picture of what you can see through a window, yoga videos, tour a museum online etc.There's about 12 options to choose from and none of them look anything like the topic work I know they would be doing if they were in school pre pandemic closure.

Right now, we are crisis schooling. We are not home educating and even the most intelligent of people are having to balance home, work, educating their children. I am lucky in that while I am a key worker, I am currently required in less than once a week and that I don't have any work to do at home. DH works outside the home as a key-worker. I have the time to set a routine and ensure our children are doing ok.

It's natural to worry that your DD will fall further and further behind, especially as she is already on the SEND radar, but it is ok to say that this isnt working and go with something that does. It it means endless crafts because she engages with them, then roll with it. At least she is engaging with something that she enjoys, and surely that has to be better than turning her off learning entirely?

I actually think her class teacher is magic and wish she was in our house getting DD to learn!

But she isn't.

As others have already said you seem very focused on what you can't do. Simply saying I can't do it is a terrible attitude. You may not be able to do what her teacher would, but approaching everything with such a defeatist attitude is only going to make the situation worse.

were you one of the people telling me I had to give up my job and home educate DS?

Nope, I thought you should give the PRU a try. I didn’t think you had any other realistic option. (Many names changes ago.)

You don't want to do any prep yourself, you don't want to use ready made lessons, you don't want to just read and do crafts and the stuff from the school isn't good enough

@drspouse

Can I just say this again for the hard of reading I HAVE NO TIME TO DO ANY PREP.

But there's plenty already out there that doesn't require any prep. It might not be specifically targeted to your daughter, but nothing ready made will be.

You just seem to be looking for any excuse not to use it.

I would love to use ready made lessons. DD won't do workbooks/can't do the ones from school. If she would or could I'd be ecstatic.

Try not to get so stressed, your child has years ahead of them to catch up.

I thought you should give the PRU a try. I didn’t think you had any other realistic option
We had no other option, realistic or not.
Academically it's been OK, I don't think they are pitching some things high enough for him, he needs to learn keyboarding (and the OT said so too but then vanished but that's what our OT does) but they "don't do keyboards".
Behaviourally it's a big pile of DOH as in, the strategies they told his previous school to use and that we try to use at home work well to keep him calm and if the previous school had listened he'd have been fine there and all this trauma would have been avoided.
But socially what I feared has happened - he's been hurt by other children - and it's not great for him seeing a lot of the behaviour. He's one of those children that's really noise sensitive and yet shouts at everyone with little understanding that we don't like it either. So maybe he will come to understand that his behaviour affects people too, or maybe he'll just end up traumatised!
Work wise it's a disaster as he was already home from 3pm every day even before all this happened.

Use Classroom Secrets.

I can appreciate what you mean.. I have two very motivated kids normally but without the extrinsic motivation of a teacher wanting work by a time, marking and feeding back on it we are struggling.

Other than that, I think you do need to take some responsibility. Could your DH not help looking for resources etc?

You're not going to get differentiated learning right now.

Or could you pay to get her in an online school, so she has that face to face through a screen?

I don’t really know why you bother asking anything on MN drspouse. All your threads follow the same pattern. People try to help but never get the answers you want and end up being so bloody unpleasant. Every time.

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