Not bashing, school have not been in contact at all, what should we do?

[drspouse]

Highly aware that teachers are under masses of pressure.
DH is KW and currently he's quarantining in the spare room (due to upcoming hospital appointment not symptoms), DS has SEN and his school have been great, loads of work packs, calling every day.
DD has been in on average one day a week but will do next to nothing at home. She's in Y1 and has an IEP.
Today she screamed for 10 minutes then read four pages, took 45 minutes to find 3 words in a word search, did crafts (she'd happily do only crafts, ever),

I emailed her teacher 10 days ago to say she was not coping. No reply. Not a single phone call the whole time she's been off. No emails.

We can't read some of the work set on the school website and the rest is too hard for her e.g. phonics way ahead of where she is, she's only just doing one more/one less. School said they were going to give the class the same choice boards in class, we asked the class teacher to let us know what she had done (she never tells us) on days she's in. No answer to that either.
What can we do now? I'm trying to work, she's learning nothing and just getting upset, DH can't help but she won't do anything for him normally anyway, she was already really behind!

Bitesize is pick up and go though if they just click their year group. I’m afraid expecting year 1 to work completely independently may be unrealistic. Which of course is the fundamental problem with the government’s idea that you can educate multiple children at home while trying to work as well.

I do realise it is a nightmare. My own year 2 child is so difficult to engage in anything that the school have sent too, even more interactive stuff.

This may not be helpful at all - if not, please ignore.

My BiL has asd. As a child he was a v reluctant learning to reader but obsessed with electronics (a bit like your dd w the crafts). My MiL taught him to read by making v basic instruction sheets for electronic projects, inc labelling diagrams with letters (attach d to r for instance). He read them because he wanted to do the activity.

She also used to hide components around the house and made him find them by reading clues and solving word puzzles. He's still annoyed by this 50 years later.

When you speak to the headteacher, maybe have some concrete requests. What will be achievable and most helpful for your DD?
I’d ask for something like a weekly personal video or phone call from a member or school staff.
Twice weekly/two pieces of work a week submitted by you and commented on by school staff via email.

If you want work that is very low set up/input from you, then I would do Bitesize. They’re short, and include lots of games & videos. Maybe allow 30 minutes in the morning and 30 minutes in the afternoon to do it with her?

If she’s very resistant to reading school books to you, then take the pressure off and just read lots of stories to her. She’ll pick up lots from watching as you read. You can point out the occasional split digraph as you read . There are also lots of maths tv shows you can let her watch - numberblocks, Team Umizoomi, Odd Squad.

Really so you want stuff she can do by herself but are not prepared to sort it you want the school to you say they give you work that's to hard for her when what you have to think about is they normally have a teacher for 6 hours a day showing them how to do it TEACHING give her the easier work to do or make a game out of it. Btw my ds is 1 yr behind already I also bought learning books a year below him for him to work though no kick offs as he know this stuff and he is still learning

I need something at her level, pick up and go, every day

BBC bitesize does exactly this, but expecting her to complete work and find things independently is unrealistic.

You say she is very behind, but that the reception work is too easy?

Sometimes doing an easier activity can boost morale, as she will feel great that she actually understands it.

I don't want stuff she can do by herself.
I want stuff that she WILL do with me and CAN do with me.
She can't do the work the school have set (some of it isn't even openable - embedded files don't work on a tablet and there are some formats we don't even understand)
She won't do stuff I find, though it's also possible she just can't do it.
I want stuff that's obviously, to her, from a respected teacher, and contact and feedback from the teacher, including some way for her to see that the teacher wants her to do the work at her level and cares if she's done it. That's what's helped DS.
As I said, we tried Bitesize and it didn't seem at all helpful. We have zero time to prepare, sift through, check it's easy to understand, find worksheets etc etc. We need stuff to pick up and go. Bitesize isn't that.

It sounds like the school aren't going to be able to do what you want.

If even Bitesize, which requires no set up or preparation, is too much for you then honestly I don't think you are going to find anything suitable for your situation.

Can you send her in to school more?

At home, I would just read to her and let her do crafts and watch some vaguely educational TV.

Hi DrsSpouse,

Gosh you’re really going through it aren’t you?

I can’t help with the school but maybe this phonics app will help with giving DD some work to do.

www.sounds-write.co.uk/page-82-app-for-ipad.aspx

It’s so good that I’d buy an iPad to use it if you haven’t one already.

How do you get a lesson and activIty that is right for a Y1 child on Bitesize? Because we haven't been able to do it.

I agree with SandieCheeks

It does sound like school aren't going to be able to offer anything close to what you want for her, so if at all possible I would send her to school for a few more days. Otherwise just focus on the reading, let her have fun with crafts and perhaps play some educational themed games or watch programs like numberblocks.

@drspouse do you mean none of the Yr1 lessons are at the right level for your DD?

This is yesterday's Y1 maths lesson
She couldn't even begin to do this.
I can't explain it without two terms' worth of lessons.
If I do it with her it will be her screaming she doesn't want to, me telling her what to write, and she'll have learned nothing.
www.bbc.co.uk/bitesize/articles/z6rrn9q
How is that easy?

Go onto the main BBC Bitesize page. At the top of the page should be ‘latest lessons’ then a drop down bar where you pick your school year. Then you get the lessons. Sometimes it will tell you that you need to print off an activity sheet etc but tbh you can easily get away with not doing this. Very minimal equipment is sometimes needed eg they used dry pasta for a maths lesson last week but again you could just ignore that too.

My ds is in year 1 and the school are okay at sending work out but I'll not lie if he doesn't want to do it I cant force him to. Sometimes he will sometimes he wont, the bitesize daily lesson are good and he thinks it's more fun being on the laptop. My dd is in year 3 and alot more willing, they are still so young and I'm sure they will be able to catch up quickly when they go back, as long as they read and do some writing every day.

Sorry cross post. My year 2 child wouldn’t do that without screaming either. But she would watch an explanatory video which is part of the daily lessons. I agree the Friday maths lessons seem to be quizzes which may well not be suitable.

But there's no video! and it's not going to give her subtraction and times tables in 5 minutes anyway.
I keep clicking to find any more and that's all I can find. Today I'm trying to keep the DCs from killing each other and shattering my eardrums. After bed I will be making the house safe for DH. When am I supposed to plan this teaching?

@drspouse

This is yesterday's Y1 maths lesson She couldn't even begin to do this. I can't explain it without two terms' worth of lessons. If I do it with her it will be her screaming she doesn't want to, me telling her what to write, and she'll have learned nothing. www.bbc.co.uk/bitesize/articles/z6rrn9q How is that easy?

That was a weekly challenge rather than a lesson. There are lots of other maths lessons on there - counting in 2s, writing numbers, number bonds to 10 etc.

If those are all way beyond where she is, then just stick to watching something like numberblocks.

It does sound more though that the issue isn't so much the content of the lessons, but that you can't get her to do anything?

@drspouse

But there's no video! and it's not going to give her subtraction and times tables in 5 minutes anyway. I keep clicking to find any more and that's all I can find. Today I'm trying to keep the DCs from killing each other and shattering my eardrums. After bed I will be making the house safe for DH. When am I supposed to plan this teaching?

Here's the link to the daily lessons for Year 1 www.bbc.co.uk/bitesize/tags/zjpqqp3/year-1-and-p2-lessons For Maths there is a lesson Monday-Thursday and "challenges" on a Friday.

There's also a daily TV lesson as well on iplayer.

You haven't said whether she can go to school more often?

Another thought, have you tried sites like PhonicsPlay?

It's mostly game based learning, so it seems more fun to the child, and they focus on the different phases so you can select ones which suit her ability.

My son has SN. None of the work set by school is at a level he can understand. I asked them to differentiate it, they said they wouldn't do that. I dont bother opening it now.

I do everything myself, lots of craft and hands on science experiments, Maths Factor, BBC bitesize, nitrotype and times table rockstars. I largely follow his interests. He is doing a fraction of the hours school expects with a lot of free play breaks, I have work. It doesn't look anything like the school want it to but it works.

Most of my friends who have children with any sort of SN are doing it by themselves, its this or nothing.

In terms of contact, I copy the headteacher into every email I send the SENCO/class teacher...which sounds extreme but I've gone from being ignored completely to an answer on the same day.

Ive been doing this a long time and I have zero time, patience or sympathy for the school any more.

Nothing from school is at her level.
If she had something that was clearly from school, from her teacher and had feedback, she would (like DS whose difficulties are much greater) do work, I feel.
So the problem IS the content as well as her engaging.

I looked at Oak but she doesn't understand multiple choice!

You can skip the quizzes and just do the videos, if that helps?

It sounds like the problem you have is just 'mummy not teacher' lots if teachers can teach a class of 30 or hold the attention of 300 in an assembly but can't get their own kids to do their homework.

I think you need to get the Headteacher involved. But work out exactly what you want first- don't be vague.

If you get nowhere with that could you afford to pay someone to be her 'new teacher'? There are a lot of people out there who could do what you would like the school to do. It might not cost a huge amount, but the 'authority' & 'accountability' might get you through this.

Otherwise I think you've going to have to be sneaky with her learning and do as a PP suggested and write notes she has to read to enable her to access the crafts she wants to do or a recipe etc.

Honestly I don't think anyone on this thread can give you what you want.

You want differentiated video lessons, work and feedback from her class teacher - which doesn't seem likely to happen.

You don't want to do any of the available online stuff.

You can't get her to do any work at home.

You can't/won't send her to school more.

So - what you can do is read with her, do lots of arts and crafts, and let her watch some educational TV.

There's no point getting yourself stressed about what isn't happening or what you can't do.