cursive handwriting, lack of support from school and 11+ prep

[potatochipsandcheese]

My child is in a rural primary school. its small for the area with only one form per year, but it has large classes (30)

He has recently had some issues with bullying in the school, which is something we have been unable to deal with by going into the school personally. The head states that 'there have been no cases of bullying in 35 years' and refuses to do anything about it.

Anyway, as a result of this, my son has decided to go for his 11+ and try to get into the grammar. I am happy to coach him through this as is his dad, what we are finding is that he is totally behind in literacy due to his school insisting on him writing in cursive handwriting. I can see his frustration, he spends a third of the day bored in mathematics as his grasp on this far exceeds his classmates (though he struggles to show his working out for the same issues as the cursive) and then he spends a third of the day feeling not good enough because he cant seem to get his litracy work marked (they wont mark if its not in cursive and if its in cursive its illegible) then they do a mix of science/re and sport for the rest of the week. He says he spends more time learning about God, than he does supported to be better in maths, science and English.

So we are desperately trying to bring him up to speed in english (most importantly) get him writing legibly (not in cursive) and accelerating his love for mathematics in a way that challenges him and inspires him.

The issue we are having, is with his attitude. I suppose 5 years of school have taught him that hes not good enough and even when he 'understands something' he is not able to qualify to them exactly what he needs to do, so he is immediately marked down.

Because of this hes given up on trying and if you correct him, he gets stupidly upset, throws things, overreacts and just generally makes everything a complete nightmare and a chore.

I am frustrated with the school, they have (in the past and recently) made it quite clear that safety, consent and respect arent important to them. They are not teaching my child to excel in his chosen fields and allowing him to flounder in those he isn't naturally getting (despite being immensely bright) because of (what I consider to be quite draconian) targets, like cursive handwriting.

I find it difficult because if he asks me why he is spending 6 hours a week learning about religion, I can't answer him and if he asks me why he needs cursive, I cant answer him either. It just makes absolutely not difference to adult life from what I can tell.

The school are not allowing him to even write in a pen because he cant write in cursive (which all his friends are allowed to do) he is just utterly disillusioned by schooling and education, despite being really bright and engaged in subjects that interest him.

Im preparing to go into battle with the school. For the last week I have removed him from the school at 15 mins past the afternoon bell, in order to school him at home as its the only time he seems to get anything relevant done.

Nothing more frustrating than seeing a bright child unable to form the letter 'e' or feel he has to join everything up so his writing is not readable.

Has anyone else found this with primary education? Any advice?

Home schooling is going well, he is really learning beautifully and his rages are getting less and less (though he hates being wrong and argues with us a lot)

I am just worried about the ensuing conversation with the school where they question his absence in the afternoons.

Sounds like you need to homeschool

Have the school not approached you in the past about his poor written skills? Has he never had any extra help with his writing? Surely (and in the kindest possible way) these things have been flagged up to you over the years?

You must absolutely go and speak to them - and not before time by the sounds of it.

Though unfortunately for your son he is going to find that secondary school of any kind isn't going to let him just do the subjects he likes and is good at!

If the homeschooling you are doing is working out, why are you sending him to school at all? Keep him home, teach him as you're doing. The school clearly isn't right for him, and to be honest having a kid leave at the start of the afternoon is probably a PITA for the teacher.

He isn’t interested in being totally homeschooled and, I’m not sure emotionally or financially I can commit to that.

I do realise he will need to do subjects he doesn’t enjoy, at home we do almost all literacy, handwriting and 11+ tuition, so he’s not doing subjects he enjoys, more ones he is failing in.

The school have only ever mentioned cursive handwriting to me. That he NEEDS to do cursive or he can’t proceed with literacy. I would far rather he just learn to write clearly and well.

What is the issue with the cursive writing? Is it he can’t control the pencil properly to form the letters accurately? In which case he might be hyper mobile and need an OT assessment. Or is it something else? What is the school’s explanation for why he is so far behind with handwriting, and what support measures have they put in place to help him?

They’ve just let him founder from what I can see.

They’ve put nothing in place to help with his handwriting, just subtly punished him for not writing in cursive (he’s not allowed to write in pen like his friends) then if he does write in cursive they say it’s not legible and refuse to Mark it. I can see why he feels like he can’t win

Because of his despondence, he’s not trying in literacy, I suppose he feels whatever he does, it will be wrong so he has developed unhealthy learning methods.

How long has this been going on? In my DC's school they start writing in cursive from year 2 and they are already prepped for it in reception and year 1. You need to look into what the issue really is that is causing him to have problems with writing. He does need to write in cursive but the school should be supporting him.

I can’t see any reason for him to write in cursive, it’s not on the curriculum and it’s not relevant in adult life.

Seems they’ve Taken a punitive approach to something fairly unimportant

And what have they said to YOU over the years about his issues? What questions have you raised to them?
Because, sorry to be blunt, but you're his parent. The school may have "let him founder" but have you explored ways in which he could be helped not to?
How insistent have you been that he knuckles down also with the subjects he doesn't see the point of? Beyond acquiescing and letting him get his own way and not do them?

And yes, they have told me about his lack of cursive skills but I assumed they would still be teaching him basic literacy.

At almost 11?

They do sound very unsupportive. Children are individuals and the school has a duty to recognise the child’s learning needs and seek to support them with those.
Using humiliation (making him the only one not allowed to use pen) and punishment (refusing to Mark his work), won’t help him at all. It sounds a very old fashioned school. Will it be a dunce’s cap next?!
Meet with the head again and ask for a specific written plan that addresses your ds literacy issues. You want to see strategies that are specific to his needs and that will actually support him.
For what it’s worth I agree with you about cursive writing, my ds is 11 and only just able to do it, but a lot of his letters are not formed properly. There is nothing wrong with printing, my eldest son is a hospital radiographer and has printed all his life! Obviously it didn’t hold him back.

My DS has hyper mobile upper limbs. Our experience with private prep school was as negative as yours with state setting.

We switched in Yr 5 and he had daily handwriting practice along with all the class which improved it a great deal. Secondary school has been fab and got him onto typing his tests right away.

If your DC needs support choose carefully as far as independent and/or grammar school settings are concerned. If they have a good learning support staff base the overall setting is likely to be better than one that just goes all out for academic excellence

My main concerns in primary have been
-kindness
-basic reading
-basic maths
-basic literacy

Part of the reason I’m now pulling him out is because there just isn’t the time after clubs and dinner to do much focused study.

The four hours a week I take him out are so important to his ability level and his learning. He finds it very difficult to learn

It sounds like they are just viewing it as he ‘won’t’ knuckle down and practise cursive till he’s good at it, rather than ‘can’t’. I’m not sure which it is either, tbh, from your posts. Have you made sure he practices it a lot at home? Or have you let it go because you can’t see the point of it ( I agree, btw, that it makes feck all difference once they’re older, but I support DD in learning it - in reception.....- because the school want it).

I am a TA in a primary school and do lots of short interventions with children to improve their handwriting. Try getting him to practice writing his letters cursively but not joined. Focus on starting on the line, the size of the lowercase letters, defenders and ascenders (once you get the hang of it they flow quite nicely as they all begin on the line). Once he’s mastered it he can then squish them back together as they will then naturally join. Iv done this with a few kids in my group and it’s work really well within the space of a few weeks and their writing is now beautiful. I know it’s frustrating for you and that you can’t really see the value but with practice he can achieve it and then get his pen licence.

As for the maths, it sounds like he is being asked to show his working out (method) and reasoning skills which again may seem pointless but are important skills in themselves.

MasterTom

The grammar here has a much better pastoral support system than the comp and also will inspire and challenge him in lessons which just isn’t happening at the state primary.

Cursive writing is a requirement for primary but not secondary. Once he's at secondary school it won't be an issue. My youngest is now in Y8 and I was only commenting today how legible his writing now is compared to the scrawl he produced when expected to do cursive at primary.
He did numerous handwriting interventions at primary, all focused on bloody cursive, to no avail. He's done 1 intervention at secondary based around letter formation and speed, no mention of cusive, and his writing is now clear, fast and mostly printed.
There is also the option of typing using a laptop becoming his normal way of working.
Sod the cursive writing, it means nothing.

Secondary schools do not care a bit about cursive handwriting. Legible, well presented and a decent volume of writing matters.

Cursive has caused a lot of problems here. DD’s writing only become legible when she gave up trying.

He’s fed up with the standard style of learning.

Find mathematical and literacy games. Make it fun. There are apps you can down load or books you can buy of amazon. Then focus on his handwriting only a bit at a time. Get a white board and time each other to spell things.

You’ve got a lot of work to do to get him grammar ready if he is lacking in basic reading writing and maths.

@whatsleep we are using basic handwriting books to get his letters up to scratch, we do a few minutes every day and just as you said, we get him to write 'cursively' but not in cursive. Mostly because it teaches him where the bits flick out and in, the lovely formation of the letters.

I'm going over with him the size and shape of letters, trying to get him to see that a 'c' is the same size as 'd' but the 'd' has a line up etc.

I dont see myself ever telling him he must now join them up though because, from what I can gather, as soon as he leaves primary, no one cares one jot about cursive after secondary school. I am (rightfully) annoyed that this obsession with cursive has lead to his inabiltiy to progress in literacy. Had I been told he was acheiving such low schools for literacy because of his lack of understanding about the subject, I would most definitely have jumped on to help with that. But all they're focused on is his cursive. Which I find infuriating.

Yes the problem with maths is definitely his working out, we are running through this with him, its helpful because in his 11+ coaching, he is sometimes failing to read questions correctly (rushing ahead) so getting him to write ever question out as a formula to then solve, is proving to be very useful.

Unfortunately the same issues with number are occuring with letters. So he is more likely to get a positive response if he just gets the question right (he gets maths very quickly) than if he writes everything out and gets marked down for his numbers not being formed properly. This then upsets him as he understands the question but is chasisted for his neatness constantly and feeds back into this 'cursive is the reason for all the issues' thing.

@LouReidDododo Yes I know - huge amounts of work and time needed to actually get him together and able to pass the 11+ and then not flounder at a grammar. But realistically we have a few months to get him ready for a multiple choice (they all are here) 11+ test and then we have a bit more time to really knuckle down and focus on the literacy. His maths is more advanced by mine (by a long way) he just needs to learn to slow down and focus on writing everything out. Which I definitely see the necessity for, his basic understanding of maths is really quite impressive though. He is incredibly gifted when it comes to maths.

Oh and his reading/vocabulary is above expectations - no issues whatsoever with any of that.

biggest concerns are

Literacy
proper formation of basic letters and numbers
and showing clear working out in maths